The Time May be at Hand

I am going out this weekend on a date. She doesn't know about my alter ego and I'm not ready to bring it up yet. I need to find out more about her and her opinions on life. The problem is that we are planning to do something active during the day. Not sure what the weather will be like here in Minnesota on Saturday or Sunday but it is about 60 degrees and just right for wearing shorts if one wants too. I have been shaving my legs regulary and it will be obvious to her that they are shaved. I really don't want to mention this hobby on our first date. I can lie to her about hygiene and having very think body hair and the need to shave it or that I just don't like hairy legs. We have only talked on the phone, but I really like her and I hate to lose her so quickly, my dating life has been rather non-existant lately. If it isn't cool, out I can get by with jeans. She knows about my theater life, but not about all the times I have dressed up as a woman. I guess I will just wait and see what the day is like and stop shaving for the week.

Shelby

P.S. Sorry if anything is misspelled, my monitor is dead and I am viewing this on a video projector on a red wall. It is hard to read, but Sara Jessica and Julie (Zenith) still look hot despite the video resolution.

Shelby, why, why stop shaving. Being honest on a first date if I noticed, I don't think, heck I know i would not make a comment about it, believe it or not she is probably very nervous herself and will be wondering if you can spot X Y Z wrong/different with her. Relax and enjoy your date :)

IMHO- wear jeans regardless of the temp.

Shelby: I would continue doing what you normally do. There is no reason to hide your legs. She will most likely not notice or at least not mention your legs. You never know what the conversation may bring.

I vote for wearing your jeans or any long pants regardless of the weather. Where I grew up in New York, close to the city, it was considered sissy to wear shorts even at my young age of 10-11, so I never wore shorts. That carried on into my adult life ( not that I thought it was sissy) and I live in the tropics of Florida! Later, I became a golf pro and owned my own golf shop. The PGA Tour does not allow it's members to wear shorts in competition, so for a more professional look, i never wore them in my shop or on the golf course. so what's the big deal about the temperature?

I like your attitude in wanting to feel her out on life's issues and see if she is open to alternate things before you come out and tell her. But by all means if the chemistry is there between you and it looks like you will be seeing a lot of her and maybe start an exclusive relationship, it needs ot be told before those feelings get so strong that you or her can end up hurt if she rejects you for cross dressing. I applaud you for wanting to tell her early. I also applaud you for not wanting to start a new relationship with a lie. So if you do decide to wear shorts and she does notice or asks you about your shaved legs, you are not lying in simply telling her you prefer them shaved and that it feels so much better then all hairy. That is the truth without telling her you also cross dress. The cross dressing talk can wait until you know her a little better.

I do wish you luck and hope it all works out for you.

I think that you should not worry, continue shaving your legs as you always do, and just wear your shorts. I have been blessed with the Asian gene, and I have very little body hair to begin with, and can't even grow a beard or full mustache! However, I do get a little bit of leg hair, and have almost always kept it shaved smooth...

When my father was remarried, my step-mom #2 actually had him shave his legs (lol in my head, and yes, he and I'm sure she knew about my crossdressing) and always told me to make sure to shave, especially underarms all the time....

so, you never know, and if needed, you can always use my story as a cover....

That's when I reach for my parka! Brrr!:eek:

Altho, I'll bet if u ignore your legs, she will, too!:)

Put my vote in the "be you" column.
If she's not into you and who you are as of now - chances are pretty slim she isn't going to be talked into it.
It's either going to be "good-by - been fun", and keep looking for miss right, or.... Hellloooo to the rest of our lives with her! :D
Come on. If she's not the right one then you're wasting a lot of valuable time not still searching.

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Originally Posted by docrobbysherry

That's when I reach for my parka! Brrr!:eek:

Altho, I'll bet if u ignore your legs, she will, too!:)

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Yes Doc, I realize that it may seem crazy to you that we wear shorts in that temp, but anything above 30 is balmy up here. It is T-shirt weather at 40. We can always pick out the warm-temp tourists in the summer, they're wearing layers while we are complaining about a heat wave.

Thanks for advice everyone. I haven't shaved in a few days and the stubble is there, my legs feel like sandpaper and I hate it. Perhaps I'll throw caution to the wind and shave anyways and see what the weather is like and what activity we decide on. If my lack of leg is noticed, I will simply tell her that I don't like hairy legs. She does have a quirky personality, so I will see just how quirky.

Shelby,

I would wear jeans, and approach the subject at some later date. There is no reason to spring this on her so soon - but then I am a chicken anyway!

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Originally Posted by Lilygirl

IMHO- wear jeans regardless of the temp.

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Nooo. Don't listen to her... She has sucumbed to the feminine "comphy" zone... Run away.. Run away...

I'd wear shorts.. And not denim ones! Maybe cargo shorts.. And some short socks.. with a slight v-neck top.. A femish male look.. Let her get a sense that your not the manley flanel shirt man (why does "I'm a lumberjack and I'm ok" pop into my head when I say flanel shirt?). That way she won't be shocked as much when she does find out...

WHY is everyone so afraid to be themselves????

OK, You shave your legs, big deal.. so do a LOT of other people. WHO CARES???

Unless she's only attracted to the Wolly Mammoth variety of person it's only an issue because YOU are making it an issue.

Relax and be yourself. DON'T start the relationship hiding things!!! You don't need to point it out either. Be YOU! Be comfortable.

Saturday will be in the mid 60s. I'm not sure about the shorts but I'm planning on wearing capris to the Zoo in Apple Valley for my granddaughter's 5th birthday this weekend.

I doubt that anyone will say anything about your legs at all even if you do wear shorts. You should wear whatever is comfortable for you and keep those legs clear of stubble that cant be comfortable at all either.

Don't worry Shelby. If it comes up just say you like them shaved.:hugs:
Angie

I say shave your legs smooth and wear pants. if you and her are doing an activity that then shows off your legs like swimming, which I don't suggest yet, then just be honest and say you don't like hairy legs and they look better anyways. Have fun on your date. :)

IMHO, I think if you are going to wear shorts, you should shave, I don't think you can get past the I didn't care en ought to shave my legs stubble, in just a week, and if you think your legs feel like sandpaper, what do you think she will think if you get close enough to brush against each other and she gets a rug burn off your legs. Once you have shaved nothing but time can make it look like you didn't. Anything else can bring questions to mind.:2c:
Tina B.

I opt for your shaving, wearing your shorts if that's what you're comfortable in, in other words, be yourself, and enjoy your date. If you are into HER, she will love you whether you shave or not. :) Besides, it can be a "first clue" which makes it easier to ease into it down the road. Above all, DO NOT LIE TO HER!

A lot of good points offered. We are planning an indoor activity of mini-golf on Saturday. She indictated that she would rather be indoors. So pants would be appropriate as would shorts.

The comment of not shaving and get in contact and her getting a rug burn was a good point. I guess when I have seen a woman's unshaved legs, I can't help but think that she didn't have time to shave and iit is all the more obvious on a lady. So if I shave then, perhaps it won't be noticed either.

I met her online at Match and she actually contacted me first. She wrote that she has a quirky attitude and is open-minded and liberal point of view. She even has 2 pet rats for goodness sake (not sure how I feel about that, I'm a cat person). She also said that she is eclectic. I think for the first date, I will still wear jeans and at least get to know her first. Once I know who open-minded she is, then I can open up to her.

We both have a love for the theater arts and got to talking about make-up. I mentioned that at a school I work at we had a bunch of girls helping the guys with their make-up needs and she was surprised and said that shouldn't a guy be able to do his own make-up? I mentioned to her that I can and find it kind of fun. She seemed cool with that and kept on with the subject.

So I'm looking forward to Saturday afternoon, wish me luck!

Shelby

I say keep shaving!
I am a very hairy in male mode so I cannot pass with shaved legs saying I like it better but I do shave them all winter and let the hair grow for summer. I takes a lot longer than 1 week to let the hair grow back so that it looks like normal male hairy legs.

Remember
Truth always prevails even when a lie is told to only one, eventually the truth will come out causing an EXTREME red faced person.

Lovingly
waiting for lazer treatment
Katari

Shelby, you are cute.
If something happens and she gets weirded out and you two quit dating...
Well, I am available, and trust me, with you shaving your legs, that is NOT a problem. :love:

Agree with Freddy12 . . . it is a first date. See how things go. You aren'y moving in together, just getting acquainted, and there is more to you (to all of us) than crossdressing. Let her get acquainted with the rest of you first, and wear the jeans.

[SIZE=4]Just be yourself and be honest if any questions come up. No need to be nervous about your life.[/SIZE]

Has she ever seen you before, if not she has nothing to compare you to, (before and after) be you wear shorts!!, shave!!, enjoy!!

Shelby,

I'm sure that the one thing you don't want is to start a relationship with a falsehood. At the very least, if the conversation takes a turn you don't want, be honest and say that you'd prefer to put that topic off for a while, or something to that effect. You want to be YOU from the start, no? So just be yourself and be comfortable!

However, I do agree that a question about why you shave your legs is not at all likely to come up in conversation. :)

tina

Been shaving my legs for years it's never ever been a problem with women. My experience has been most women like it.

Shelby, I think you'll have a great time, so just be yourself, and don't worry about what she might think. When the time comes, you can tell her everything and I'll bet she'll be OK with it. Have a great time Sat and let us all know how it went. :)

So I went on my date with this GG and we had a great time. It was not that great of a day, so we went bowling. We spent 4 hours with each other and will see each other soon. While we were bowling, my hair kept flopping down in my face and I complained about it. She suggested that I binder up my hair on top of my head "more power to ya" she said. Well I did eventually - dorky looking. Later in the pub area, she commented on her hair getting in her way and wished she had a binder. I offered her mine, but she declined say that it would be weird to share hair accessories on a 1st date.

There was one opportunity to mention my cding for a murder mystery some years ago when she mentioned the show subject. I told her that I had been in 2 but didn't say anything more about it. I'm still testing the waters with her yet.

It sounds like she may have a few skeletons in her closet that she wants to tell me but not sure how or when, so this gives us some common ground. All in all, we had a great time and I am falling for her. I just need to spend more time with her before I drop the big one on her. Thanks for everyone's interest.