Maybe Full time would not be as fun

My CD activities have been in 4 to 12 hour compacted events.

I really enjoy my time in dresses and skirts. Getting Barb to pretty if that is possible) is the objective and then some affirmation at a restaurant or while traveling or shopping. Frankly, I put a lot of effort in looking my best, a lot of preparation and concentration. Even having to dress down to nice jeans loses something.

I have started thinking that living as a full time woman would be a lot harder, more work and a lot less fun. The fun or energy would have to come from someone who appreciated you, your efforts and what you put into looking like you do. I could see getting tired and feed up with the whole "dress to impress", especially if there was no one who cared.

Then there is real life: a job where you did not dress up, have to do laundering, cooking, going to Wal Mart. Youi know there is a big difference between how you "could" be looking and how you end up looking. I could see that being real depressing, a downer.

As a guy I can put on whatever, go to Lowe's, change oil, and have no expectation placed on me by anyone else. At least I do not feel any.

I think as a woman I would feel like I am being evaluated all the time, especially by other woman. Men look for an attractive gal and if she is not, then he just say “OK" and moves on. But as a woman, I think she is always comparing herself to other woman, how they prepared themselves or how she behaves (ladylike). She also knows others are doing that evaluation on her.

Or I am missing this all together?

If you really had to live as a woman all the time, would you want to?

Barb123

I agree, Barb! I spend SO MUCH TIME AND ENERGY preparing for a "Sherry session"! At present, I only dress about every 2 weeks, so that's OK.
But, I can't imagine doing that on a daily basis! Altho, I know MANY girls here DO!

Definitely!! I've done two and three day continuous stretches and I can't wait to put it all away and become a slob again! Lol. I'm just too lazy to be a woman full time.

I agree. After dressing up & making up every day and trying to be as femme as possible, it sure does feel good to take a break and return to my old male 'slobdom'. It only takes about 24 hours, though and the thought of my tight girly jeans hugging my butt while my silky cami carresses my skin and the feeling of bra straps reminding me......... and I;m quickly drawn back to being Donna once again!

I agree, it is nice to be a girl when I want to be. Perhaps if I didn't have the beard of Fred Flintstone (a friend once said I look like some of the wanted posters at the post office !!) it would be easier, right now I have to apply my beard concealer with a putty knife.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by AKADonna

I agree. After dressing up & making up every day and trying to be as femme as possible, it sure does feel good to take a break and return to my old male 'slobdom'. It only takes about 24 hours, though and the thought of my tight girly jeans hugging my butt while my silky cami carresses my skin and the feeling of bra straps reminding me......... and I;m quickly drawn back to being Donna once again!

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I seem to be doing the same. I find that as full time as I like to be every so often I look forward to not shaving and crossdressing as a guy. The "fun" quickly wears off and I'm lucky if I can last the day without letting Michelle back out.

I dunno, I think most gals are just plain busy wearing their many "hats".:)

I would like to try.

Seeing that women can dress up or down as the need arises, I think I could get used to it quite easily. If you go to the store, not all women are dressed up. In fact, most are not well dressed and some are down right horridly dressed.

I don't need to dress up all the time to be a girl, I just need to be me.

[SIZE="3"]It seems to me, if one goes full time the novelty would wear off and thus be less fun. [/SIZE]

What makes you think a GG dresses up all the time? If she has to change the oil in her car she is going to put on grubby clothes the same as a guy. A quick trip to Walmart will tell you that GG's don't always dress up.

John

you do have a point there girlfriend, however here lately I've been living about 95% enfemme, and it seems that when I have to go back to drab mode for work it is depressing me more and more. So, for me at least, it seems all the extra effort is worth it.

The part I hate is the constant face and chest shaving, otherwise I would love to be a girl all the time. I feel feminine in both nice dresses and jeans.

[SIZE="3"]I'm with Jacky83 here. Too much of a good thing changes it. It just doesn't seem that it would be nearly as much fun to be traipsing about in hair and makeup and baggy jeans, pullover top, running shoes, and cotton underwear!

It may be more comfortable and more appropriate for a trip to Lowe's, just not what I signed up for. When I get dressed, I wear heels and whatever it takes to go with them![/SIZE]

I'm as close to full time as I can get right now. 6 days a week. most of the time I go out, it's en femme. Certainly there's more time involved in getting ready, I shave more and take showers more often, but worth every minute to me... I just feel better en femme.. am happier and feel good.

While I certainly do not desire going full-time, it might be fun to be enfemme for several days in a row. In one of the other threads, someone is going for the weekend to Biltmore house and will be enfemme from the moment she leaves home until she returns. I dream of having that kind of experience. I've been able to dress much more recently and the 'thrill' hasn't worn off.

I'm with those that say one doesn't have to dress up for every moment. Dressed for housekeeping or yard work is about as gender neutral as you can get. But (in my mind) it would still be a thrill to dress for the occasions that expect it or can be exploited for it.
The discussion brings to mind a question Barb; obviously most of the writers dress to a higher standard en femme than they do drab, is that because the thrill is gone from dressing to impress as a male or was it never there?

To many here, it seems that the only look requires heels and a skit or dress. And everything has to be perfect. To be a guy requires any old shirt and pants. On the transmen side, they all talk about wearing ties. Ties are the things that say 'I'm a guy." I suspect that very few of the responders here where a tie every day.
I don't understand the thinking that you can only xdress if everything is perfect. Most women don't wear high heels, pantyose and a skirt or dress everyday----and don't want to. No more than you want to wear a tie.

If given opportunity and acceptance, I would go fem. It sounds like alot of work, because it is when a person is living with two lives. One fem & one drab, and switching back & forth.

If I could get away all my male mode stuff and think fem without a time limit, I would take the advantage. As mentioned earlier, just like my SO, I would wear more realistic daily clothing like pants instead of just skirts. A decent makeup job for me is about 15 min., after a shave and being oriental, the body hair isn't a big deal.

C'mon girls, no one ever heard of the GG's celebrating that its cold outside, thus wearing pants so they don't have to shave their legs? That's reality! We CD's try so hard to emulate what we want to be that we forget the most basic things of what women really want to wear. Sensible and comfortable. Like a t-shirt to sleep instead of a camisole or babydoll.

WW

I'm really happy with being en femme on a part-time basis. When I dress, it's my "thing" to do so very glamorously... it's sequin dresses, stockings, heels, feather boas, full make up every time. It's all part of it for me. We all approach it differently. :)

A lot of it, I think, is getting into a routine, which is I think might take away part of the thrill of crossdressing for some, that it breaks the routine.

I cannot remember the last time I wore men's jeans or trousers, or men's underwear for that matter. So, to some extent, I am crossdressed 24/7. However, I do not present as a woman anywhere close to that. Around the house I'm usually dressed in more casual jeans (shorts in summer) or jeans skirt and t-shirt, almost always wearing forms but rarely makeup and hairpiece. This is actually how I feel most in balance most of the time, both masculine and feminine simultaneously.

However, right up to the point that I'm ready to put on makeup, my morning routine is the same whether I'm going totally fem, totally masculine, or somewhere in between. I keep my legs shaved, and I shave my face as close as I can whether I'm putting on makeup or not. My chest gets shaved only as far as needed for the top that I'm wearing that day (my wife likes my chest hair), and all of those other places that hair seems to sprout get cleaned, like ears and nose. Other than putting on makeup and my hairpiece, my morning routine is the same.

My wife and I went on a 5 day Dignity cruise last month. Including the day prior to departure that we spent in New Orleans and the 2 days driving home afterwards, I was totally en femme for 8 days straight, and there was little extra effort above what I do at home. Just added makeup and hair, which meant getting up a half hour or 45 minutes earlier than usual.

I have to add that I try to wear the least amount of makeup that I can get away with. I had a makeup lesson at a MAC store a few years ago, and when the makeup artist asked what look I was going for, I said that I wanted to cover my (heavy) beard shadow, but look like I'm wearing either little or no makeup. That's my style that I'm the most comfortable with, and it changes little whether I'm going to the grocery store, to church, to the theatre, or to a dinner party. So, once the foundation is on to cover the beard shadow, I'm ready to go in about 10 or 15 minutes.

So, no, I disagree. I think I could easily go full en femme full time if that's what I wanted. But, like I said, I seem to be most in balance when I'm somewhere in between. For now, the time that I spend almost completely masculine seems to be offset by the time that I spend totally en femme. And most of the time I'm somewhere in between.

Bobbi

:eek:I guess that I am with the "lazy" ones as When I dress up it takes so much time to get the look that I want especially if I am going out. As far as being home anything goes as right now I have a jean skirt thigh highs and flats. No makeup and I definitely need a shave.:o I think it would just take up to much time. I have been to a weekend as my femme self and it was fun but did get tired of all the close shaving.:eek:

As someone who is in transition, I can agree that the "fun" is different to what it was when I was part time, but I would definitely not want to go back.

Yes it takes a certain amount of effort to be presentable every day for work, but the freedom of being the real me more than compensates the extra effort.

At the moment, I am planning my wardrobe for the departmental Xmas weekend away, it's great fun working out what I'm going to wear for travelling, whether I'll wear my evening dress for dinner as well as the party or whether I'll change between the two; and things like how many pairs of shoes a girl can get away with taking on a 24 hour weekend :)

Those who have said that you don't have to "dress up" all the time are right - sometimes I'll just put on a denim dress and trimmings to nip out to the shops. I'm not so sure about needing slacks to be warm in winter. We have had sub zero temperatures around here for the last week to 10 days, but I find my long winter skirts and knee-high boots provide plenty of warmth. Yesterday, I wore my linen skirt with the embroidered handkerchief hemline, it was a bit of a pig to iron, but the feel of it swirling around as I walked was absolutely wonderful.

I guess you can't know for sure unless you tried it.Some girls who have srs regret it and some have finaly found peace.I like to daydream about it

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Originally Posted by Barb123

I think as a woman I would feel like I am being evaluated all the time, especially by other woman. Men look for an attractive gal and if she is not, then he just say “OK" and moves on. But as a woman, I think she is always comparing herself to other woman, how they prepared themselves or how she behaves (ladylike). She also knows others are doing that evaluation on her.

Or I am missing this all together?

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I hope you don't mind me answering this from a GG's POV.

I think what you're missing is that most of us GGs don't feel as if we are being judged by others when we go about our daily business. If you just look around, you'll see women dressed casually with minimal makeup, if they're even wearing any. They feel comfortable in who they are.

It's true that everyone enjoys seeing a beautiful and well-put together person (male or female), but that's just the cherry on top of the sundae. Most of us do judge others based on their demeanor, what they say, their body language, their actions, basically who we perceive they are inside. Not on how they look. Little things like fashion or makeup are inconsequential, really, in our day to day lives. It's not to say that when a woman dresses up for an outing, she doesn't care about her appearance, and if she is competing with other women for men's attention she might have a glance or two in their direction to check out the competition. But, most of the time she does go about her daily business just like everyone else. :)

I think it is CDers, more than anyone else, who place such a priority on looks and have such a critical eye for what others are wearing. And this does makes sense because CDs are constantly taking notes to see what they are missing, to determine how they can pass in a gender different than assigned at birth. And perhaps in the process, in order to feel better about themselves, some CDs (not all) get into the habit of comparing themselves to GGs who do not place such a priority on their looks.

Well, I suppose there are some non-CDs, namely small segments of people who also form opinions of others based on what they have and this extends to how they look, but for the most part, if I look around at all the people I interact with in my daily life, I do not feel judged by others based on my appearance.

Does any of this make sense to you? :) If you feel evaluated, it is perhaps not on a scale of makeup or fashion expertise, but maybe it is more about people trying to understand why a GM would want to dress as a GG. You and I, and the people in our community understand all of this, but people in the mainstream don't. My SO and I go out together dressed frequently, and she always presents and dresses beautifully. But, if we are stared at, I believe it is because she has been read and people are just trying to understand who they are seeing. They are not evaluating her makeup, her nails, her jewelry, or her choice of sweater, shoes, or dress, as a CDer would.

Maybe this is why many TSs cease to place so much importance on their looks. They've altered their appearance with HRT, electrolysis, perhaps FFS, so they begin to feel comfortable in not looking like men even with nothing on, and this gives them the confidence to just be who they are without so much emphasis on fashion and makeup?

I dress every day for 4 continuous days per month when I'm off on work trips. Unless I'm at a business meeting, I'm fully dressed. That really is about the right amount of time. Taking an hour or more (when things go wrong) every dressing is a lot of time. However, when it is time to fly home I'm always a bit sad. Sorry that my girlie time is over.

well i try to be loni as much as i can, even doing car work in-fem. (sorry karren) but i do cut fire wood while i am in a pair of skinny jeans, would hate to get my skirt caught in the chain..and i do not want someone looking up my skirt if i am under the jeep.
but if a gg must do such i try to do such. yes wig forms and all.

so i guess i can say i am almost living full time. but the job is almost all drab. company required outer things.

I agree, it's so much work to present as a fully made up woman 24/7 but even women have their down time. We just over compensate our looks hence we have to work harder at it.

When I wax my beard and take a trip to japan I'll go for a few days en femme!

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Originally Posted by Angiemead12

I agree, it's so much work to present as a fully made up woman 24/7 but even women have their down time. We just over compensate our looks hence we have to work harder at it.

When I wax my beard and take a trip to japan I'll go for a few days en femme!

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yes i agree it is alot of work, i guess if i were much more passable and felt totally confident being fem it would be easier to stay en fem all the time.

I know each of us is different in our need, circumstances and our innate physical and emotional make up. I envy those of you who can blend or pass...I can't realistically. But I have spent 24/7 (minus occassional public time)with my wife, entirely enfemme for days on end, months really, and honestly, I never tired of it...or more accurately, I never thought for a moment of being any other way. so to paraphrase another Kim says above, I don't necessarily need to dress up all the time, I just need to be me.

Being a fulltime woman is hard work. Being a part-time crossdresser would be simpler for all of us. Not that it is easy to be a crossdresser at any time. The time,expense,and dedication that is expended in our mutual endeavor is mindnumbing.

A 24/7 crossdressing woman, a transitioning woman, a transitioned woman, or a GG has more than just appearence needs. It encompsses not only looks but includes every aspect of our lives social,business,family to you name it. We can't ever not be a woman and all that it entails for us.

So NO it is not as much fun but YES it is very much worth it.

Danni

I understand this topic seems to assume a generalized perspective vantage point. If looking at acumen and physical “labor” females devote toward even their basic appearance, I agree that recognition is certainly due. Compared to a female, a male pales in devotion to detail devoted to physical appearance before going out in public.

But if the due diligence in “female appearance maintenance” is being viewed in terms of a comparison between a genetic male and genetic female, where both share a common goal (displaying a public image which is socially perceived as “female”), a few basic factors seem to have been overlooked here. One critical factor being “genetic sex”.

Attempting to “compare” the effort required by a genetic male to “pass” as a female…with the effort required by a genetic female to present as a “female” within the context of implying both are starting from a “level playing field”, is applying an invalid assumption.

A genetic male has a host of obstacles to mask or modify prior to reaching a point that even vaguely resembles a “level playing field” starting point (where both begin “getting dressed & ready to go out in public“).

In my opinion, much of the “preparation” and “maintenance” required to be female, may not be as exhaustive to females as it appears to be for the genetic males endeavoring to “pass” as females. Genetic females have the advantage of having female physical attributes to start with. The also have acquired the tips and shortcuts gained over a lifetime of growing up female. Thus, what takes a CD hours to accomplish (in appearance), can be perfected in 15 minutes by the typical female. It has just become a simple “routine”, like face shaving is for a male.

Many of the things females have mastered and do easily, will always require substantial effort on the part of a CD. :sad:

Hey, let’s face it, being a CD is not an easy job. But somebody has got to do it, right? :heehee::thumbsup:

:love:

I agree . It IS a lot of work. Maybe that is one reason that GG's are presenting the way they are nowadays. There are surely a lot less June Cleavers amongst the populus in the 21st century than there was 50-60 years ago. More women HAVE to work, and many less stay at home, maybe equals a little bit of a time constraint for them too.

I wonder sometimes, The initial thought is, living full time would be great. But I bekieve that you are right, after the initial break in period. I am not sure that the fun would still be there. I would love to have more "Raychel Time", But as far as giong full time. I am thinking that is probably not the best idea.

I agree with Eluzion and add in that it all has to do with "natural femininity"..A gg USUALLY has it already!lol We don't[some of us],so our work is in creating "passability".There are some more natural beauties on here that can pull off a range of looks with little effort while most of us can't...That is where the sunglasses and hats come into it..lol Or the sweatpants with something like PINK across the butt..[attractor].

I'm with Karen. It is too much work. "Lazy" is my middle name.

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Originally Posted by jacky83

[SIZE="3"]It seems to me, if one goes full time the novelty would wear off and thus be less fun. [/SIZE]

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isnt that the reason ggs get makeovers and such and new hairstyles and colors and different nails, women get bored with them selves too hence the shopping and always getting new shoes

I think you'd have to do like most GGs do, which is have 2 or 3 modes:

• For weekends and every day stuff, you'd have to develop a look you can throw together in 30 minutes (not counting the leg shaving routine etc) for knocking about, errands, etc. A quick shave (see below), throw on some light makeup, a skirt or shorts or jeans, hair and a couple of accessories, and go about your business. I might even skip the breastforms a lot of the time.
• If you're working femme, you'd just have to accept the fact that your day is going to be an hour longer than guys, cuz you're gonna have to spend that long getting ready in the morning. GGs do it all the time.
• Then there's the glam mode, which is less often but requires "the works", including trips to the salons and shopping.

The biggest problem to me is the facial shaving twice a day. I think a good electric razor, as suggested in another thread, would be the answer, else you'd eventually run out of skin! Use electric for every day, and the blade(s) for special occasions.

when I transitioned back in the early 80's, the first several weeks were 'fun and games'. The key difference once the novelty wore off, I was more comfortable as a her than as a him. And yes, I DID change the spark plugs and oil in the car once in a minidress and 4 inch heels just to try it...and never did it again!

Jenn

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Originally Posted by Barb123

....... As a guy I can put on whatever, go to Lowe's, change oil, and have no expectation placed on me by anyone else. At least I do not feel any.

I think as a woman I would feel like I am being evaluated all the time, especially by other woman. Men look for an attractive gal and if she is not, then he just say “OK" and moves on. But as a woman, I think she is always comparing herself to other woman, how they prepared themselves or how she behaves (ladylike). She also knows others are doing that evaluation on her.

Or I am missing this all together?

---

Next time you go to Walmart, find a place to sit and watch the "genuine" women shopping there. Who are they trying to impress?

Check some of the photos here:
http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/

You can live as a woman and dress however you wish. Just remember to shave and sit down to pee! :heehee:

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Originally Posted by Kim_Bitzflick

I don't need to dress up all the time to be a girl, I just need to be me.

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Very good point which illustrates a valid difference in some of the mindsets within our community.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by eluuzion

A genetic male has a host of obstacles to mask or modify prior to reaching a point that even vaguely resembles a “level playing field” starting point (where both begin “getting dressed & ready to go out in public“).

In my opinion, much of the “preparation” and “maintenance” required to be female, may not be as exhaustive to females as it appears to be for the genetic males endeavoring to “pass” as females. Genetic females have the advantage of having female physical attributes to start with. The also have acquired the tips and shortcuts gained over a lifetime of growing up female. Thus, what takes a CD hours to accomplish (in appearance), can be perfected in 15 minutes by the typical female. It has just become a simple “routine”, like face shaving is for a male.

Many of the things females have mastered and do easily, will always require substantial effort on the part of a CD.

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Very well stated. Shaving one's face is a perfect example. Not only is it a pain and typically requires heavier coverage makeup along with more application time and technique, it grows back quickly which can make that all day presentation difficult at best.

Speaking as one who is undergoing electrolysis on my face and tweezes the rest when I go out and about, I can tell you that once this is done, the time it takes to "put on the girl" is drastically reduced. There is so much advantage to being able to toss on a light powder foundation to smooth out one's complexion, not to mention perfecting other makeup techniques which are quick, easy & appropriate for daytime looks. Wearing lower-maintenance casual clothing makes the whole thing that much easier. Travelling along this path makes that effort which many of us find so exhausting pretty much disappear, thus being more conducive to a full-time presentation and/or life.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ReineD

Maybe this is why many TSs cease to place so much importance on their looks. They've altered their appearance with HRT, electrolysis, perhaps FFS, so they begin to feel comfortable in not looking like men even with nothing on, and this gives them the confidence to just be who they are without so much emphasis on fashion and makeup?

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This is true to a certain extent but it also speaks to the fact that the woman who transitions simply settles into a presentation routine similar to that of any other woman out there.

That said, there seems to be pressure from the community as well which discourages exhibition of any fondness for the trappings of femininity. Otherwise, once cannot truly be a TS, right? Of course this is nonsense. I will stand by the fact that just as there are differences among natal females when it comes to presentation, fondness for clothing/shoes (or lack thereof) and the wearing of makeup, the same goes for the TS woman.

I would stay with my part time dressing status. Dressing up every day would be too much work. LOL

I for one have lived full time as Nicole on many occasions for a week at a time and once was able to live en fem for a little over 2 weeks. Yes, I did need to get up a little earlier each day to apply my makeup and do my hair, but that is me just living the life I wanted to live. I won't claim to have changed the oil in my car while dressed as Nicole, but then I don't change it myself when in drab. I have had to changed a tire while in a dress and 3" pumps, but that was only because I didn't want to wait for the auto club to arrive.

I have visited Lowe's and the Home Depot many time while fully dressed and was accepted as any one of the woman who were also there at the same time. I go shopping wherever I like and purchase whatever I need and don't worry about it.

The way each of us chooses to live our lives is a very personal issue. What is good for you may not be good for me, and this is fine, we are each after all different people. If being part time works for you so be it, enjoy your chosen lifestyle. I personally am living part time due to necessity, this I hope will change in the near future. For me, living my live as Nicole full time is what is right for me and I can't wait to begin my new life totally en fem.

I only have so many hours in the day and if I were to try to bring my daily presentation to a level where I could go out en femme, I'd need a 26 hour day. I can't give up sleep nor can I not be there to help my wife or others in the family. I suppose there might be some ways to develop shorecuts, like permanent beard removal, but that doesn't fit the budget for now. Full time might be very satisfying and even fun on occasion but not only is there a lack of acceptance and understanding beyond my wife, there just isn't enough time.

I retired 3 years ago, and wear nothing but a dress around the house. I do not go out dressed. As is the case with most GG's, I don't put make-up on most days. Occasionally though, I'll put on everything including long nails. On those days I usually will do a fancy dinner for my wife and myself. She loves it. It is those days that makes me feel super feminine. The other days I an just Linda. When we go out shopping, I always wear panties, and my wife will ask me to put on a dress when we return home. Life is great!

Since I retired I will go 24/4 or 5, as Tina, just as any other women does, many days it's just a pair of Capri's knit top and a pair of flats, no wig and no makeup. The house work gets done I feel feminine, and I'm dressed as fast as when in drab. Some days it's nylons, heels and everything that goes with it, thats days I'm not mopping floors or something. Five years of it and it hasn't gotten old yet!
Tina B.

Isn't it really locked into our goals as male to female transgenders? For those of us who really do not like presenting as men, it's got to be heaven to be able to be the women they wish to be, regardless of the struggles. In fact, those struggles would become a badge of honor in the process.

For the rest of us who want to be a part of both genders, the method, frequency, and duration of transformation will reflect not only the desires of our transgendered selves, but also the situation in which we find ourselves. I would surely like to attempt a set of longer-duration transformations in order to gain the understanding of what that means, especially all the little details that would be required to maintain the feminine gender smoothly and consistently. Since I don't want to lose my masculine self, I'm pretty sure that my femme self find that a turnabout had happened: right now I yearn to transform to Tina as I'm mostly male at this point, so I'm pretty sure the as Tina for a period of time that yearning to go back to being male for a while would grow.

We are who we are :)

tina

I am pretty much dressed all the time. Neither sex is fun all the time but instead I see myself as female so it is right more so than fun.

I dress whenever I feel like it. My femme clothing is a cross between street casual (which I shlep around at home in), and dressy/socializing/cocktail. I yearn to go out in public as much as possible, not because I am an exhibitionist, but because I crave anonymity as a woman. It's something tat takes some skill, and I'm up for the challenge. I want to look as believable as possible to anyone, at any given time, and am planning on doing electrolysis & laser after the holiday season. I've even lost close to 30 lbs in a year and a half just to look more feminine. I grew tired of looking like the bloke who did bench presses and free weights, then ended up looking like a fat shlub after I fell of the excersise routine and quaffed a few beers....basically I looked like every other bloke out there. Now I'm hoping to grow my hair down past my shoulders.

Oh yeah, and there's still a strong part of me that likes to be a guy, and do manly things......weird, eh?