Age appropriate dressing

At the risk of raising the ire of some people I must ask the question ,but first some background for asking
I was out with my wife last night at a new Blues Club which had opened ,I work in sound with a friend which was why we were there
She nudged me and said "that's either a bloke or a very ugly woman " and proceeded to comment on the shortness of the skirt . Now this woman was in the late 40 to early 50's and it was a CD as I observed her coming back from the toilets ,later she was up with a friend another CD and they were dancing
Now the people in the room didn't care in particular but there was some sniggering but both their skirts were micro mini's which begs the question .....why micro mini's why not something more age related to the knee . The legs were not pretty enough by any stretch of the imagination for such lengths

Now obviously I dress and my wife knows but I dress in a manner reflecting my years now ...I wore mini's in my 20's but would never do so now

I understand some girls prefer a shorter skirt/dress but is it really a good look to take out ?


Ok hit me

Short answer from an outsider's perspective: no it's not a good look to take out.

Some CD's just wear whatever they want to wear, even things their 20-year-old daughter can't get away with. They're obviously not fooling anyone and it may not look really flattering, but not everyone's got that high on their priority list.

Hi,

From a womans point of view.

as many know Im involved with two groups & we dress in the times of those periods 1900 to 1914 Edwardian & Renaissance 1400 to 1700. all our dress's - skirts & for men are long . my background & family were all long, so the dress for the times is fitting for us.

go back & see how fashion has changed & youll see the differences ,
Now some who would like to wear those clothes of the times see the mini skirt & will wear that regardless of the dress sence of the times or the person ,

so haveing said that for our groups & what we are about & trying to reinact the times we dress accordingly & it looks right, my clothes reflect myself of the day now could i wear those clothes every day my Edwardian skirts & dress's are lovely yet for the day or time i wear them its pretty good more like not every day ,

Now my renaissance or garb = clothes yes i could because of my background & the style is in keeping with my style & look .

Iv allso been traveling around Austraila as well . & ill do it again, next year, why, well its a good talking point & the clothes stand out so its different,

Now some people have no sence of style or are the clothes befitting the person wearing them , well some have no idear, dont care ether, though i dont wear those type of clothes of the 60's to 70's nore will i , I do see some who do. yet its not up to myself to belittle them in what they wear,

I dont know ill take it these are men dressing yes i know some would see them as , ...what.... are they trying to prove,

Ill put it this way we women do talk with each other a lot about clothes & we ask each other if what we have made or are wearing for the day is right for the times / looks with in keeping with who we are, or if its not quite right we help each other, & sugest idear's to help.

When you have the backup from your group it does help in many ways, with out that it can be quite hard, getting it all together,. i wonder what you'd say if / when you see me walking around or on planes dressed as i do. hey i do get nice comments....... in Tasmania or Sydney.......Oh, Melbourne yes been there,

...noeleena...

An interesting take on things ..not knocking it at all but , this was not a transgender venue so all I was thinking silly me is if your going to a venue like this dress to blend and not stand out that's all
I have a friend who blends both male and female dress all the time nails painted the works but he is not trying to be fem so he goes through shopping centres and such un noticed

I'm in my mid 30's and I had a friend come over a while ago, first time I've dressed in front of her too.. (We've shared pictures) she was saying that I wear my skirts too short, and that they should be about 3 inches or so above the knee at the most.. Anything else is a touch ****ty. Plus you need a really good tuck!

I started replying, then deleted it. I'll always be nice. Unfortunately, when I spot others out and about, I usually see age, venue, time of day inappropriateness.
You can dress any way you want, anytime. If you get comments, just don't jump onto this forum and b*tch about how unfair people are, a GG dressed like Britney would get stares too!

To each their own I guess. Its not always age appropriate but venue appropriate. Some of us dress to pass, some dress to show off. I recently went out my first time with a cd friend. We went to a alternative club. I was way over dressed as far as the others that where there. Yes the skirt was a bit shorter than my usual but it was to fit into the surroundings. My friend he dressed to show off. Short frilly skirt, cleavage and alot of leg. He admited thats why he goes there. To be seen and to draw attention. Thats not my idea of fun, I would rather just be myself and dress casual and spend a nice day in the park or the mall. We each are different and thats what makes up the diverse world we live in.

When out in public, I think dress for the occasion and appropriate for you age. When at home, you can wear anything your little heart desires. Daviolin

I agree with ya. May be they just felt younger with a short hem line.

I am in my late 40s and legs are my best feature. Trouble is that I have found it hard to buy skirts or dresses much above the knee. But now I found a short skirt a good 3 inches if not more above the knee but not mini skirt. I brought it in Asdas. I am not a tucker but you can not see the crown jewels. I've been out and about and even got a wolf whistle (genuine not mickey taking).

Maria

Age inappropriate dressing is something I don't understand. But the good news is I don't have to. I don't dress like that, but if it is someone else's cup of tea, let them have it.

I agree some older people do wear their skirts too short.
If you have great legs take advantage of it but if you have a butt ugly head,to go with them it still won't work.
Like you I do sound support.
I am older and have to replace sound systems when they go down at a club.
Rarely dressed in these situations but I do sometimes feel like a pedophile amongst the younger ones when working.
Another age appropriate problem but can you find a 20 year old with 20 years of experience.

Hi Terri I don't go out so I can dress any way that I want to at home but when you are out you should dress appropriately .

I'm guessing that some folks dress a certain way as they actually want to be noticed. I always dress in a way that looks nice and makes me feel comfortable. To each their own.:)

I agree with the basic concept that whatever you like is fine...in the privacy,of your own home. In public it's a different matter. I am sure I elicit enough sniggering from those who recognize I'm a bloke, so why add to it by trying to dress like a teen.

There are exceptions, i suppose to any such rule and perhaps there are public occasions where these girls would fit right in.

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Originally Posted by terri_sandal

Now this woman was in the late 40 to early 50's and it was a CD as I observed her coming back from the toilets ,later she was up with a friend another CD and they were dancing

Now the people in the room didn't care in particular but there was some sniggering but both their skirts were micro mini's which begs the question .....why micro mini's why not something more age related to the knee.

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Guilty your honour. Over 60 and frequently wear skirts up to 8 inches above my knee. Out and about most days too - photo is from my favourite venue, the Australian War Memorial. If you are interested here is why:

• I'm breaking society's fundamental rule that males must not dress as females so, as a male in a dress, I'm already profoundly guilty
• I have worked hard over 12 months to lose 70 pound to have a reasonable body shape as a 'senior'
• a DVT in my leg requires me to wear compression stockings to stop swelling
• I missed my female 20's (and 30's and 40's) so never had the chance to dress in young age appropriate clothes
• I am over 6 feet tall, so a skirt 8 inches above my knee does not require a good tuck
• my legs are my best feature
• blending used to be an objective as a defence mechanism but now I'm sufficiently confident to dress how I want.

I do wear longer skirts (3 to 4 inches above my knee) in some situations such as when I'm flying pretty. My makeup is always neat, accessories carefully chosen and, from comments I receive, I don't look trashy - just age inappropriate. The ultimate compliment was being called a bitch by a friendly sales manager in reference to my legs.

So, am I bringing discredit to the CDer profession? I do think on this but my view is that I am a good ambassador - smiling, friendly, engaging and above all, visible. I've made a large number of friends and acquaintences dressed, far more than male me. I take the opportunity to educate - many are very surprised for example that I'm heterosexual.

You are absolutely right though - people don't care in particular. I find that those who do usually have a positive response to me the person. That's empowering.

So tell me, am I wrong? Actually, don't answer because I dress for myself not others.

We all should dress to be comfortable and confident in whatever we choose to wear, but the outfit IMO, should be age appropriate and suited to the event! However some appear to throw on what ever happens to be clean(er) and fits.

I try to dress age appropriate only because that seems to be a part of being a classy old broad and a naughty librarian! Sure, I wish everyone did, but there's a ton of stuff I wish for with no hope of fulfillment.

The only rule should be: people can dress how they want, as long as they're willing to accept the consequences (ridicule, etc.)
If the thread starter isn't judgmental itself, it certainly provoked judgmental replies.
The whole idea of crossdresser fashion police is laughable.
And, again, some people can't seem to express a style less conservative than their own without using asterisks.

I've seen plenty of GG's that dress inappropriately for there age, so I guess an occasional guy dressed age inappropriate in a dress isn't hurting our image all that bad, it says more about the individual than the whole movement.
I mean we are talking about a guy out in a dress, the world finds that inappropriate already, so what's a short skirt going to hurt?

I'm not totally "age appropriate" unless you mean the age I present at and not the age I am.
As for the mini's well, again, to each their own, but when you dress in a manner that is obviously too young for your presentation then you are just showing off and inviting ridicule. Of course some go the "I don't care, I wear what I want" route and that's up to them, but for me I feel it not only opens them up to comment, but does so for the general group as well.
I've seen girls out in public here wearing tutu's and such shopping at Dress Barn and it just makes me wonder where their self-esteem level is.

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Originally Posted by terri_sandal

why micro mini's why not something more age related to the knee . The legs were not pretty enough by any stretch of the imagination for such lengths

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Let me ask you another question. If this was a woman who say was in her 50's and she had great legs would you ask the same question? This age appropriate BS is just that. Really? Maybe they looked at your outfit and said...my gawd... a 1980's tour shirt from Kiss?? Why doesn't he grow up?

Is it a good look to take out? It was for them....your opinion doesn't amount to a hill of beans (as stated in an old blues song). Best to clean your own house and not worry about other's.:brolleyes:

Does my avatar look age appropriate? Well here is the rest of the outfit...yes the skirt is short but it looked good Attachment 208742

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The only rule should be: people can dress how they want, as long as they're willing to accept the consequences (ridicule, etc.)
If the thread starter isn't judgmental itself, it certainly provoked judgmental replies.
The whole idea of crossdresser fashion police is laughable.
And, again, some people can't seem to express a style less conservative than their own without using asterisks.

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NicoleScott you are awesome! /agreed

-Donni-

I ALWAYS wear skirts above the knee or fairly short shorts (got two pair). I'm in my 40s, but most people think I'm much younger, especially when I'm dolled up. But, I don't care what most people think. As long as my BF (tee-hee) thinks I look okay, fo-get-a-bout-it. Yesterday at breakfast, Paul and I had a nice time. I wore some clean white shorts and flip-flops with a cute blouse. We didn't get any grief at all. It was wonderful! I too think my legs are my best asset and I'm going to show them off until I can't. That doesn't mean I'm going to wear micro-minis, that flamboyant style isn't me... but I will wear shorter skirts.

Now I am having a round of self-doubt about my hemline. After reading these comments, makes me wonder if its time to switch out for all maxi-dresses and floor length skirts. Perhaps the matronly look is what I should dress to.

Does this raise other issues like: Is it inappropriate for a girl of my years to show cleavage? Do my skirts need to fall below the knee? Would a high slit be a source of ridicule?

What's an older girl to do? Perhaps what ever she is comfortable with, damn the torpedoes!

Hugs, Robin

So, what you're saying is I shouldn't have worn this out to dinner and a club the other Sat. nite? Because I'm 70?

I say do what real females do. If you've still got your figure, FLAUNT IT!:D

Attachment 208746

Terri, there are basically 2 kinds of people in the world. It makes no difference whether they are male or female or whether they CD or not.

The first group, [which I believe you usually/always fall into] will buy and wear stuff "trying to conform or fit in".

I fall into the second group. I buy and wear stuff that I like wherever I want to. If "people" like what I am wearing? Great.

If they DON"T like what I am wearing or THEY think it is wrong or not age appropriate? Great. They have the option of looking elsewhere.

IF a woman is thirtyish but still looks like a teenager what would be the "right" age appropriate clothing for her to wear?

Almost no-one here is in the position to tell anyone what they should and should not wear and no-one's asking for that. Still, I do think were allowed to form opinions on other people's outfits, and other people are allowed to ignore your opinion if you happen to express it. If that's 'judgmental', so be it. I'm not really worried about the 'fashion police' as much as I'm worried about thought policing.

Dressing 'age appropriate' is no different than any other fashion rule and you may get away with breaking the rule. That however is very subjective, and in my opinion, not many can get away with miniskirts or ultra-miniskirts or whatever.

We CDs dress for fun probably more than most women, but public appearance should be considered. My first avatar showed a cheerleading outfit I bought after years of wanting one, years after I could think of actually wearing one, even if i was a GG. It's for home, and maybe Halloween or a costume party, but even then- i think one should give a nod to one's age (i'm about 50, youngish 50, but still...)

The CD in me says get what you want, but the 50 year old says 'let's not weird out the neighbors'. So I wear these things inside. I've found a few wearings usually gets the 'fad-ness' out - and interest wanes- (this is another reason you hear advice like spend ggod money on classics and basics- but not on fads)

That said, there are lots of different ways to wear a skirt, and probably quite a few different ways to wear a miniskirt. I've seen older women (or should I say 50s & 60s instead of 'older') wearing shorter or short-ish skirts, quite well, but the cut was appropriate for their body shape (no longer twiggy), and the accessories (tights, shoes, blouse, coat, gloves, etc.) were more classically or sedately styled- Ralph Lauren, for instance, instead of Versace (gianni).

But take it from Cher - not the singer- the Character Alicia Silverstone played in "Clueless"- never trust mirrors always take pictures. Fortunately- digital cameras are cheap and tons of pix are even cheaper (use rechargable NiMH batteries). Show a few outfits to friends or post here to get feedback. It'll save you a lot of grief, unless you are the person who says 'darn the torpedoes', and then, well, more power to you. But that's not the image i'd prefer to project at this particular point in my life age and circumstance wise.

FWIW- i'd LOVE to be able to pull of a nice miniskirt look, but i'm resigned to the fact that my body shape will never be the way I'd want it to be to pull it off the way I would want to in order to wear it in public.

-k

i suppose i dress age appropriately and to be comfortable, and i'm not just talking about the clothes.
its about my comfort level and what i feel i look good in.
trust me, if i had some of the beautiful shapes that you girls do, i would be wearing mini's and showing my boobs :)

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Originally Posted by NicoleScott

The only rule should be: people can dress how they want, as long as they're willing to accept the consequences (ridicule, etc.)
If the thread starter isn't judgmental itself, it certainly provoked judgmental replies.
The whole idea of crossdresser fashion police is laughable.
And, again, some people can't seem to express a style less conservative than their own without using asterisks.

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That is my take on the world we live in too. If you don't like it, don't look. If you laugh and make derogatory comments, just remember that someone is probably doing that to you as you walk down the street in your "age appropriate" crossdressing clothes. The reason I and others here take objection to "judgmental" opinions such as yours is that this is a support site where most of us are hoping and trying to get acceptance out in the real world and we then can't even get it here. Acceptance not for "how" we dress, but rather acceptance to dress as we please as long as we are not breaking any laws. As someone else said above, as long as they don't complain about any negative reactions, it is all fine with me, and I don't think I have heard anyone on this site really complain about being laughed at because they wore something that was not age, or even venue appropriate. If they mentioned it, it was more of a comment and they accepted the reason as valid. Genetic males and females dress inappropriately all the time, and yes, they also get laughed at behind their backs. But, on this site being judgmental is also many times interpreted as "follow my rules and opinions" and that is not acceptable to me. It can be interpreted as complaining and whining on your part, even though you do not think that it is. Life is like that, live with it. I do and I am very happy.

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Originally Posted by robindee36

What's an older girl to do?

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and exactly WHEN does one become an older girl? I know that women "dis" other women at all ages for what they wear.

Proclamations about how one ought to follow the rather arbitrary rules of fashion always strike me as a bit disingenuous in a place like this.

Isn't the whole mission statement of crossdressing something like "do what thou wilt?"

This is a hot button issue here, but I am firmly planted in the age appropriate camp. I think the term is often confused with "frumpy" but women in their 50's can look both sexy and appropriate, as an example.

And this would apply to ANYONE of ANY gender. If I was out with my jeans hanging below my ass, I'd look pathetic, not hip.

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Originally Posted by Jenniferathome

If I was out with my jeans hanging below my ass, I'd look pathetic, not hip.

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Difficult to say Jennifer. Might depend on what one's derrière looks like ;)

Hugs girl. Robin

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Originally Posted by KaliBrooke

Isn't the whole mission statement of crossdressing something like "do what thou wilt?"

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I thought it was "wear women's clothes", but if it's "do what thou wilt" that might as well include following rather arbitrary rules of fashion if that suits you and commenting on other people's outfits if you're allowed to do that.

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Originally Posted by Zylia

Dressing 'age appropriate' is no different than any other fashion rule and you may get away with breaking the rule. That however is very subjective, and in my opinion, not many can get away with miniskirts or ultra-miniskirts or whatever.

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What do you mean 'may get away with breaking the rule'? Damm, I'm a man in a dress. How many rules does that break?

I've never been ridiculed (but I'm not a mind reader either). I've had really positive comments.

Thanks to all you lovely legged young at heart mini skirt wearers for coming to my support. Enjoy how you dress and have the confidence to go forth as you want to present.

Wear what you like, and what makes you happy. What is age appropriate? Leggings, and a tunic look good on a 17 year old, and a 70 year old. Make sure it fit's nice, and flatters whatever you are flattering! Instead of "age", I'd say "venue" appropriate!

I see a lot of people--GGs & guys--who don't seem to care about their appearance; who opt for clothes that reveal underwear & unsightly physiques. I disapprove, but I don't go over & tell them to shape up. People cut me a lot of slack when I go out in skirt & handlebar, so I figure I should do the same.

Would you tell Sharon Stone or Tina Turner or Cher they aren't dressing "age appropriately?" No? Well if you look as good as they do at their age, you can wear that short skirt.

For the rest of us, wear what looks good on you, not what you think will. Wear what's appropriate for the occasion. And if you are going to dress out there, don't complain if people don't react well...

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Originally Posted by Jenniferathome

This is a hot button issue here, but I am firmly planted in the age appropriate camp. I think the term is often confused with "frumpy" but women in their 50's can look both sexy and appropriate, as an example.

And this would apply to ANYONE of ANY gender. If I was out with my jeans hanging below my ass, I'd look pathetic, not hip.

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As an inter-gendered woman having just hit 50 this year... I believe that I look pretty darned good for my age, BUT.. the stuff I wear to the club would not see the light of day without some serious embellishment (This is a PERSONAL choice not a rule everyone needs to follow). I love the whole gothic/Edwardian/Victorian look and can make that work most of the time. For other times that are just casual with friends I tone down to very nice n casual clothes. Clothes are for the occasion, and not set in any particular rules. Someone else here posted that women of all ages comment about other women all the time whether they are wearing the "right" clothes or not.

My two cents..

*hugs*
Bethany

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Originally Posted by terri_sandal

I understand some girls prefer a shorter skirt/dress but is it really a good look to take out ?

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I'm in my 50s. There are two rules in my book and I adhere to them:

1) Neither the young nor old should wear minis unless they have the legs to sustain them. This means no cellulite (unless it is hidden with hose), no pudgy flabby legs, no varicose veins, no skin going south as the result of gravity, no thighs that jiggle while walking. Opaque leggings are OK since they hide a multitude of sins, but only if the body is weight proportionate.

2) The older the woman, the longer the hemline, irrespective of her legs. Styles that 20 year-olds wear look ridiculous on a middle aged woman, even if she has a great body. Here's a picture of what I mean: http://images3.chictopia.com/photos/...rd-pri_400.jpg.

The styles must not only match a woman's body, they look best if they also match the age reflected in her face else the whole effect leaves something to be desired. An inch or two above the knee is fine though.

That said, the above advice is for people who want to be seen at their best advantage and who want to maximize their attractiveness. Obviously if a person doesn't care, s/he can wear what s/he wants to.

I observe people a lot. And the vast majority of GGs that I see dress appropriately for their ages. There are people who champion individuality and personal freedom and of course it's a free worlds. But, I can't help but think that Kirsty Alley, for example, would have looked much better had she worn something else:

http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:A...ASY-1YCSLGUlnE

http://www3.pictures.zimbio.com/pc/K...Mg637X_afl.jpg


... and of course, anything goes in nightclubs. The above refers to being out and about in the mainstream.


:2c:


Edit - And this applies to men as well. I think this man would look better if he wore something else:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_gxhS2LZ8ML...20in%20speedos

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Originally Posted by Michelle (Oz)

What do you mean 'may get away with breaking the rule'? Damm, I'm a man in a dress. How many rules does that break?

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I'm really not interested in discussing a specific example here, but you can get away with it if you have great legs for example, or if it's not entirely inappropriate for the occasion, or if it doesn't read as '16-year-old schoolgirl', or if it looks like you did in on purpose, etc. etc.

It's always easy to dismiss everything because you're "a man in a dress", but some of us do try to present as a woman with an overall sense of and respect for fashion. It's just a choice you can make, but you surely don't have to.

I think when I first started to get comfortable with my dressing I always went with the short skirts or tighter then I could really pull off. But as I matured a little. The little girl in me started dressing more normal. You see I never got a chance to go through everything normal little girls go through. So I do now sometimes. But I have grown and the girl in me has also grown. So when I am able to go out. which isn't that much. I now dress more my age. So I don't think there is anything wrong with some of us dressing younger. And if you can pull it off more power to you.

Hard to find anything about knee level, it is either well above the knee or way below the knee.

While I think it's a free country or countries that most of us here in live in and you can dress as you like. You do have to prepare to be judged, even if anonymously, if you stand out in the way you dress no matter what the gender.

When I was learning do drive my Instructor was an older woman who was always perfectly dressed. As we drove around with me failing to park probably and reverse correctly, he and I had a wonderfully bitchy time commenting on women whose, shall we say, dress sense had let them down. I carry on this even now when out driving. My wife is a kinder woman but even she has been known to comment. There is a woman around here of indeterminate age but ever morning she is to be seen out walking dressed in what only can be described as an eighties teenager's outfit. Age appropriate? It's not even era appropriate.

Upstairs hidden away is pastel coloured little mini skirt and a matching pastel coloured top. I've tried them and pretty as they are. I cannot see myself walking down the street wearing them. Pity.

If you really want to see inappropriate dressing, google 'Traveller girls Ireland' Bear in mind many of them dress like that every day.

We are not fashion police or thought police. If this was a thread about fashion or style, all opinions are appropriate. But this thread seems to be a rather judgmental referendum on whether a mature CDer should wear a certain outfit. Many responses are rather judgmental and close minded. Unless the question is about passing, "age appropriate" critiques seem inappropriate.

Simply observing that some people (CD or not) don't adhere to a set of arbitrary rules they may not care about as much as you do is just that. Thinking someone is dumb or vapid because he or she doesn't dress age appropriately would be judgmental.

There was an interesting discussion on the radio the other morning. Someone was reading a list of things a GG over 40 should not wear.......long hair, cleavage, short skirts etc. Pretty much the same outcome. I wear things that make me look good and that fit the venue. I don't wear mini skirts to the mall but I do wear skirts and dresses there. I don't feel a requirement to wear the "uniform" of the day, jeans and a T. To a club I'll wear anything I like that looks good on me. Age has little to do with attractiveness so styles that are pretty will always be my choice.

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Originally Posted by Sally24

Someone was reading a list of things a GG over 40 should not wear.......long hair, cleavage, short skirts etc.

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Thank Gawd I am not 40 then :D And people wonder why women lie about heir age? Because some idiot made a "rule" that when you reach X you can't do something anymore. Wouldn't it be great if there was a rule about men not wearing certain things after a certain age????