Crossdressing is DANGEROUS
Crossdressing is definitely dangerous, in more ways than you may think… :doh:
Recently I picked up a rather malicious virus on my computer, the third major event of this nature in the past five years. I had to take my laptop to Wichita for emergency repairs, since I couldn’t even get IN to my computer. I didn’t have my laptop for four days, an interminable time when so many things are going on, and so many important things are pending. For one thing, I couldn’t visit this site as I like to (dressed), but I was able to view things and post, meekly, using my sister’s computer in her room. Ah, technology…
What does this have to do with crossdressing? Well, all three times that my computer became infected was the result of Freddy looking up something about crossdressing, usually searching around for a decent story or two – you know, for inspiration. I should stay here and twiddle my thumbs, I suppose, but there are precious little “happy” MtF CD stories to be found in these here confines. So, I venture forth, in search of imaginative fun, not really the truth, but a reasonable facsimile. A happier crossdressing world, where boys can be girls, must be out there somewhere, right?
Apparently not. Oh, I’ve been looking ever since I logged on to the Internet many years ago, in fact the very first thing I looked up online was crossdressing ANYTHING. At that time I was in a dark CD wilderness, and I needed to shed some light on my own existence. Way back then, when I fancied myself as an innocent girl (still do), I found some really beautiful stories about crossdressing. This was very reassuring at the time, and it propelled me along on my continuing journey. Although I’m not really going anywhere specific, the journey is endlessly fascinating, so I keep going. Based on these early online experiences, I keep looking for some GOOD stuff…
Unfortunately, they (whoever they are) have prepared a trap for me, and if I go a little too far I will fall into it. I seek “vanilla,” and I get poison in return. Every time I’ve been trapped, for lack of a better word, I was in the process of looking at something beautiful or innocent. Trust me. Right after that, the world came crashing down. This amazes me. What is so awful about MtF crossdressing? Has some societal watchdog decided to punish all who dare to even think about such delights? Why else would I be ensnared by my own curiosity? Am I being punished?
I mean, I have to wade through nearly the entire lexicon of human depravity to come upon the pretty flower of MtF crossdressing (in my view), only to see it crushed under the boot of public opinion. It’s an adult “thing,” I suppose, but can’t we secede from the nation of Pornographia, at least long enough to enjoy our frilly panties? We largely closeted types aren’t hurting anybody with our precious daydreaming, so can we please be allowed to think our girly thoughts in peace? I may be perverted, in the eyes of others, but I assure you that my chosen perversion is healthy and natural…
This most recent event (with the virus) was so damning and so malicious that it shook me up for days. Looking at the screen of my laptop, and reading the words put there for my displeasure, I was thinking that I must be a criminal of some kind – what I had been looking at (which was benign in the extreme) must have been created for sick minds, or worse. I half-expected the doorbell to ring, and maybe field some questions from the police, or get some unwelcome phone calls from people in authority. Do I hide my CD stuff? I DID! I assume no one cares about my porn stash, but how do I explain my CD closet? Oh, I was worried for a while, but that was whole point of this “attack.” Breathe deeply, Freddy…
Anyway, I drove to Wichita with my computer, got it fixed, and (thankfully) all is well. However, I’m left with this nagging feeling that MtF crossdressing is a dangerous enterprise, no matter what angle you may approach it from. It’s even dangerous, and costly, when you’re nosing around looking for something beautiful, but I guess few people see the beauty in what we (or some of us) do. There must be others who see things the way I do, and ignore all the ugliness, but is it necessary to set up minefields around our imagination, and funnel us into approved pursuits? I know it’s dangerous out there, no matter what we MtF crossdressers do. Even a person like me, with no SO, no sexual identity crisis, and no brakes on my imagination, is subject to extortion from those who have no imagination at all…
Crossdressing is dangerous. I get it. I’ll be keeping a low profile from now on… :sigh:
