Is CDing really a hobby ?

I'm going to start by apologising to any one I've offended when they have called CDing their hobby.
The first time I read it, I saw red !
I like so many have been to hell and back and not only hurt inside but also hurt others, so how could a hobby relate to that ?
If you haven't been through turmoil and your dressing started and continued in pleasant stages I can see now how it can become an enjoyable but totally consuming pastime. Perfecting the look is extending the hobby, the more you do it the better it gets, I can also see now why many say the sexual content has gone, a hobby is not about that.I have never lost that, I do enjoy dressing but my pastime is painting, combining the two is my small slice of heaven.

Hi Teresa,

No offence taken here. Is it a hobby? I suppose an argument could be made in favor of that stance but I think it would a be a personal call. I personally don't see it as a hobby for me as it is part of me. I have plenty of hobbies and they all wax and wane at different times of the year. Taking on the Isha mantel is consistent and I never loose any zeal in doing so. So for me not a hobby.

Hugs

Isha

Hi Teresa,

Again, it is about definitions of 'hobby' I guess. For me 'CDing' is not something I do 'for fun'.. it is as integral to me as eating. I have never been able to give it up; it is just part of who I am. I am also a musician and play live regularly in a local rock band. I have always been a musician (well since 15) and again I do not see this as a 'hobby'. I cook and take photos and do lots of other things that people would regard as a hobby as well. But I have changed careers a few times too! I guess many people would say that anything you do that isn't your main source of income is a 'hobby'... but would include raising your kids, being married, etc.. I wouldn't see those as 'hobbies' either! So is a hobby something we can give up easily as it is not part of our main life's work? If that is the case... CDing is not a hobby for me. It is an expression of who I am and as vital to me as the air I breathe.

For me yeah its a hobby, at least now having just accepted it.
We are different and for others it's perhaps more serious. For many men it's just a joke at a party once or twice in a lifetime. I have a friends who's wine expert and he gets offended by people who don't take it seriously when ordering wine at restaurant.

Teresa - only you have your experience, every other CD is not you.

I guess it depends on who you ask...for some it is, for others it could be a way of life...I guess it depends on the person....for me its like a hobby, then sometimes not cause there is some internal connetion that isnt sexual but extremely femminine....It combines alot of my (hobbies) together into one..fashion,makeup,art..i guess we all define it in our own way...i will be darned if i figured it out yet....

Just as much a hobby as breathing, eating, and thinking are! Lol!

maybe in the sense that i collect heels, as one would collect coins and stamps... :)

For myself CDing is a hobby in the sense that I collect nice things, mostly wigs. It's an art form in the sense of expressing feelings by presentation (clothes and makeup) and it's kind of a way of life in that it's an ever present condition regardless of which mode I'm in. :battingeyelashes::)

I don't really consider it a hobby, It is more just a part of me,
More just who I am, rather then something I just enjoy to do.
When I am dressed I feel more like me, then when dressed in drab.
the drab clothes are just all wrong for me.

for me it is a COMPULSION!!!

For me a hobby is something you do in your spare time for fun and you clean up and put it away when you are done.
For me it is anything but a hobby. It is a part of who I am and I am trying, every day, to find ways to integrate it into my normal ( If I can call it normal ) life.

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Originally Posted by Adriana Moretti

It combines alot of my (hobbies) together into one..fashion,makeup,art...

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I really liked Adriana's point of view in the subject but like to add that most hobbies in general are accepted by society, our lifestyle...not so much. People often question our sexuality because of the wide spectrum of CDing, by that I mean we have different reason why we do it and some involve our sexual identity. To me it is more a therapy, it allows me to be who I am inside for a few hours. And isn't it so much fun?

I suppose there are aspects, that are similar to a conventional hobby, like Kate collecting wigs. And I know some hobbies can become controlling obsessions, even to the point of addictive behaviors. Perhaps for the occasional CDr, the term hobby fits. It doesn't work for me, because like so many others I feel that this is an integral part of who I am, not just something I do for recreation.

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Originally Posted by Erica Marie

For me a hobby is something you do in your spare time for fun and you clean up and put it away when you are done.

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What a perfect description of CDing :battingeyelashes:

More than a hobby, less than a compulsion. Of course, I'm speaking just for my own self :) I do definitely have a need to let this part of me out. I'm definitely in the closet for now, but one day.. you never know :)

I think there are many different points of few for that.

In the eyes of transsexuals it is almost much more than only a hobby, because when they do cd-ing they can feel the "correct" gender. They then are in the "correct life". I can understand that for these people, it is hard to understand that others say it is a hobby, because it is much more for them. And i apologise now for the next lines by them...

But i do it as a hobby. When i have time and i like to, i dress me up. But it is only the feeling of high heels and womens clothes which makes it interesting for me. If i have enough of this feeling, i put away the things and everything is "normal" again. For me there is not the transsexual "thinking" behind cd-ing...
But as i mentioned before, i can understand people thinking different to me. I have contact by mail and chat to some transsexuals. We are talking about heels and clothes we like and so on. For them cd-ing is much more than a hobby.

So please don't throw stones at me, when i write that it is a hobby for me, because from my point of few "hobby" is the most fitting word for cd-ing...

According to "Webster", a hobby is "something that a person likes to do, a favorite pastime or avocation". For me CDing is a major part of who I am and at times does control my actions and needs. Enjoy.

For me saying that cross dressing is a hobby would be equal to saying that me being heterosexual is a hobby.

Back when I was hindered from dressing and passionately embraced every opportunity I got, CDing was a very real compulsion. Now I'm free to dress whenever and wherever I like and I have. It's not such a big deal now. It's very much like my other hobbies.

For me, it is just a hobby.

No offense, but I suspect that many CDers describe it as "just a hobby" to defuse the emotional impact when telling their SO. If it's *just* a hobby, like collecting stamps or restoring old motorcycles, the wife doesn't need to worry that you're gay, or in line for SRS, or just some kind of low-grade perv. To paraphrase a 50-year old presidential campaign slogan, "in your hearts you know" its something more -- something fundamental.
. . . . . Tamara Segunda

One aspect of transgender folk is their incredible diversity. I wonder if transgender people aren't more diverse than the rest of the LGBT spectrum. I'll bang on about transgender being a useful term because it includes both being and expressing a gender identity other than the one assigned to you at birth without requiring a transgender person to do both. It includes people who think of their dressing in clothes not usually considered their gender as a hobby, as performance, as art and it includes people in physical transition from one gender to another. It also includes people like me who are not in transition, do not identify as their gender at birth, do not identify as the opposite gender, do not want ever to pass as the opposite gender but mostly wear the clothes of the opposite gender and have much of the presentation. It is certainly no hobby for me but I do not get to tell you how you define your gender identity or your gender presentation. You own that. You get to define yourself and your presentation in exactly the way that makes you comfortable.

I do think this is the most useful thing that transgender people have to teach the rest of society. Each of us owns the way we describe ourselves. None of us have the right to define another person's identity. I guess we do, as social creatures, get to pass judgements on the actions of other people if they are harmful. But presenting as another gender is so innocuous, so not harmful that the rage, condemnation and frequently violence that it elicits just blows my mind. It may be human to want to define ourselves by the fact we don't present ourselves like that weirdo cross dresser over there but I do think people can be taught doing this does not actually help you become happy with your own identity. Happiness, as they say, is an inside job.

I suppose I could get upset that someone else appears to devalue my identity by saying what they do, which is much like what I do, is a hobby, but I just cannot see how my getting upset will make me any happier with who I am. I do see how my getting upset continues a very long and very troubled history of human beings believing that the way others think of themselves is anybody's business but their own. So if you think cross dressing is a hobby, go for it and I will continue to think it is an essential part of my identity. We can, as they say, live and let live.

I apologise to all before I start.

I have found it a great past time.

The hobby aspect comes from making clothes jewellery and creating personnas.

So there! :)

What an intriguing question! I would not have thought about CD in that way, but I can see the picture. I have my share of hobbies, and I can see how it could be considered a hobby depending on what your end goal is (i.e. where do you want to take the CD activity as a part time (hobby) or full time activity (compulsion)). Hobbies I have involve some sort of competition, to do something better, to collect things, to win things and so on. Part of my CD activity is collecting items, and learning to utilize them and testing the effort in a public forum.

For me, I am still sorting this out, and if my collection of clothes, shoes, make-up, etc are the parts of a hobby activity, so be it. This has certainly got me thinking.....

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Originally Posted by Erica Marie

For me a hobby is something you do in your spare time for fun and you clean up and put it away when you are done.

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I wasn't gonna say it was a hobby until I read this. Today I had some spare time, I dressed, it was fun and I cleaned up and put my clothes away (actualy I stressed about hiding them haha). I guess it is kind of a hobby.

I can see that for some the "Hobby" thing would apply. However for me it is part of my life, not something that I do on occassion and put away. I come home from work, kiss my wife, slip into a skirt and blouse, fix dinner, clean up the kitchen, have coffee and desert in front of the TV and slip into something soft and slinky to go to bed. It is part of my daily routine. It is part of who I am.

Hi Teresa, Trains and CDing are my two favorite hobbies in no special order.

I'm a habitual dresser as much as everyone else here and I'm certainly not immune to the more compulsive aspects, but I do treat it as a regular hobby and I try not to let it affect the rest of my life too much. If this habit and this level of dysphoria is the worst thing that happens to me in life, I know I will die happily indeed. I try to keep it fun and interesting because it actually is fun and interesting, and I know I'm in too deep if I had to wear ladies' underwear to work to function properly.

It's an addiction for most here. "Most" of the ones with female names and a hobby for most w/o female names. It's just our Human Brains at work trying to "reconcile" stuff/allow us to "feel good"...

Pretty UNcomplicated actually.

Crossdressing a hobby? No... not for me. Some friends of mine might call it that way.. but since I cut my friends a lot of slack with regards to this side of me.. I don't really mind. Would they consider expressing themselves however they feel a hobby? Would they consider raising their kids a hobby?

In the same vein, I don't consider doing martial arts, making music or even doing science a hobby.. it's my way of life. It's ingrained in me, it's how pretty much everything I do is guided.

Not really sure where to put playing video games actually.. been doing that since I was 5. :p

Now, for example, messing around with make-up and shopping. Those are hobbies for me! Taking and editing pictures and videos.. more hobbies! :)

A hobby or a passion it's what you want it to be, use it to enrich you life..be happy

If it was just a hobby to me, I would not feel such withdrawl when not fully dressed.
I always have something Fem on.
In the words of Lady Jessica " I"m just drawn that way".

Yeah it's hobby-ish I suppose.

A hobby in that I enjoy the time I spend on the activity, and sometimes spend more time on it than I should. Not a hobby in that I can't just sell my collection and quit and find a new hobby. I mean, physically I could, but not without severe costs to my general disposition and mental state.

It certainly is not a hobby for me.
It's not at all like stamp collecting, woodworking, or anything else that I view as a hobby. For me it is part of my life. It's something I find I cannot do without unless I choose to deny who I really am. I don't believe that hobbies define us the same way that I am defined by my dressing and expressing my feminine self.

I would definitely call it a hobby. just something fun to do every once and a while :)

It's not a hobby. You can quit a hobby.

No. Collecting stamps is a hobby.

Putting on a dress, wig, makeup, etc., and trying to act feminine, that's not a hobby. You can call it whatever you like, but I call it "acting normal."

Crossdressing is my favourite and most fun hobby of all my other hobbies. Always puts a smile on my face and is so awesome to share with others!

According to the definition posted on Wikipedia, I consider my CDing to be 100% a hobby. For instance, the first line in the Wiki article "A hobby is a regular activity done for pleasure - typically during leisure" describes my time spent as Victoria accurately.

The next important part of the definition "One alternative to collecting physical objects is collecting experiences of a particular kind. describes why I spend the time to dress myself up and step outside into the real world as Victoria.

Like woodworking, photography and jewelry making, "Some hobbies result in an end product. I consider this to be the end result of a session in which my wig has been styled, makeup applied and seams straightened.

So for me, according to Wikipedia, I am a cross-dressing hobbyist. Another thing to point out to those who say you can just quit a hobby, no harm/no foul. Anyone who has amassed a collection of stamps, or coins, or baseball cards or sprockets, does not just give it up. A tremendous investment of time, money and knowledge has gone into it.

Thanks for the response, I haven't done a count but it looks like 50-50 ! For me it still isn't a hobby but I have learned through this forum how different other people's lives can be and how the adage live and let live is so true !

Hi Teresa, that is a great summary... What this thread has emphasised to me is how important this is to me... It is so easy to think that we all think the same... when we are a very diverse community! Thanks for this xx

For me personally it's not a hobby because wearing makeup and women's clothes is how I feel like myself. At the same time though, it doesn't offend me that some people treat it as such, everyone experiences/expresses it differently and what CDing means to that CDer isn't really anything to do with me, whether it's every day or once a year. All that matters is if it makes you happy, if it's not hurting anyone then it's not for me or anyone to judge or question.

I've used the word "hobby" in the past but always in quotes like that and for lack of a better term. I didn't understand myself at the time and I still don't in many respects. So if you catch me saying something like "our little hobby" in an old post please don't take it the wrong way, it's merely an expression of insecurity on my part. I think I am slowly being convinced to seek some shade under the big TG umbrella but I'm not quite there just yet.

One man's opinion:

There are indeed a great many parallels between crossdressing and hobbies. It is quite easy to see how crossdressing may be considered a hobby. They both provide pleasure, consume resources (time, money), and in some cases become obsessive. Hobbies and crossdressing may each be the center-point of marital discord. There are interest groups for crossdressers as there are also interest groups for hobbiests.

There are also differences. Unlike crossdressing, hobbies are a behavior; a behavior that can be changed. Hobbies may be performed for enjoyment where crossdressing may be performed in response to emotional distress. Hobbies don't burden the hobbiest with shame and self loathing. In some cases, crossdressing is a precursor to significant gender identity issues that lead to transition or self harm if transition is not available. I would guess it's quite rare for a hobbiest to be overcome with uncontrollable tears due to his hobby, but that is a common occurrence among crossdressers.

In some ways, crossdressing may also be viewed as an addiction, where the crossdresser keeps chasing that 'high' he experiences, or suffers a form of 'withdrawal' when he cannot. He may also suffer a shame similar to an addict as he tries to hide it from others, or anxiety as he tries to deny it to himself. Like an addict, a crossdresser does not have the power to quit. However, while there are many programs that have good success at relieving the addict of the addiction; that is not the case with crossdressing.

I apologize to any that I have offended. The topic touched a nerve this morning. I'm preparing to take my anxiety riddled head to another therapy session later today.

Best wishes
MsVal

So, I have had and still have hobbies. I made a stamp collection and I built a model railway for my children and for me. In both cases it was an amusing pastime that was shared openly with many people including my children. They did not introduce tension into family or married life. There was no deep seated sexual aspect to them. I could pick them up and put them down at will.

Cross dressing on the other hand has always been a deep need for me with a strong sexual aspect. Whereas stamp collecting is well understood and accepted by society at large, cross dressing is not. I did not need to go to a counsellor for help in understanding my stamp collecting or model train building hobby. I have not found any books or articles on the psychological drivers behind stamp collecting and nor does anybody in my city offers counseling for stamp collectors.

As far as I know, neither stamp collecting nor model railway building have driven people to wish to change their gender.

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Originally Posted by Kaz

Hi Teresa,

Again, it is about definitions of 'hobby' I guess. For me 'CDing' is not something I do 'for fun'.. it is as integral to me as eating. I have never been able to give it up; it is just part of who I am. I am also a musician and play live regularly in a local rock band. I have always been a musician (well since 15) and again I do not see this as a 'hobby'. I cook and take photos and do lots of other things that people would regard as a hobby as well. But I have changed careers a few times too! I guess many people would say that anything you do that isn't your main source of income is a 'hobby'... but would include raising your kids, being married, etc.. I wouldn't see those as 'hobbies' either! So is a hobby something we can give up easily as it is not part of our main life's work? If that is the case... CDing is not a hobby for me. It is an expression of who I am and as vital to me as the air I breathe.

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I agree with KAZ CD is a real integrated part of me ..and not a hobby ...I even need more time to express my feelings ,,,,,It cannot be a hobby ...it is a need ,internal rehabilitation of the real me who is imprisoned in the darkness of my body ....SO if I'm jailed how can it be a hobby .....Well a slight exaggeration but it is the truth ... ..

Well said :-)

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Originally Posted by wanda66

a hobby or a passion it's what you want it to be, use it to enrich you life..be happy

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Umm. I'm not sure a "hobby" fits something that is an almost primal necessity for some and something that is gender inappropriate for many in contemporary gender binary society.

The answer to the hobby question depends on where a person is in their crossdressing. For each of us, CDing is on a continuum... some dabble a little and others are consumed 24/7.

There are probably points at which the "hobby" becomes more than that... just as a casual photographer over time may well become a professional. But that doesn't mean that the professional photog is just a serious hobbyist.

So if you are dressed 100% of the time, you have probably progressed beyond the hobby stage. But if you are content to wear panties or pantyhose once in a while... maybe sleep in a nightgown on occasion and be perfectly content and satisfied with that level of dressing... then it may well be a hobby for you as well.

I have little desire to go beyond my current level of dressing and would/could probably cut back on that if circumstances changed. That is obviously not the same for everyone here so it is hard to identify CDing as a hobby for everyone... but it probably is for some of us.

Lacy PJs

While one can draw many points of similarity between a hobby and cross dressing I believe they are superficial. Cross dressing, even in its most benign of manifestations is quite different to a hobby. Huge amounts of analysis are spent trying to understand the impetus behind the desire to cross dress. Counsellors, psychologists and psychiatrists have spent countless hours trying to understand the driving force behind cross dressing.

For all of the respondents to this thread who truly believe that cross dressing is a hobby I have one question. Are you now prepared to tell family and friends that this is one of your hobbies along with wood turning and all of the other popular hobbies?
If indeed it is a hobby then why does our community spend so much time trying to conceal it from others?