Feeling weird at my parents home

Hi all!

Hope you're enjoying holidays!

I wanted to talk about this situation that's maybe very common for many of us.

I'm spending my holidays at my parents, away from my gf who's on a trip with her parents. My GF is the only one who I can share with my passion for CDing, so I don't really have a person to share my feelings right now. Plus, there's a lot of women in my family and they keep talking all the time about clothing, makeup and other girly stuff... I have tried to blend in their talks but I just feel weird, because they obviously don't have a clue about my feelings and likes, and here I'm just a regular guy. :straightface:

I really want to enjoy my vacations with my family, but at the same time I'm missing my GF a lot and my CDing time at my home :battingeyelashes: :battingeyelashes:.

It's kinda frustrating to be away from the things and the people you enjoy the most. I know there's a time for everything in life, but at this pint in my life, when I'm really starting to express my femme side, I'm getting really anxious about it! Luckily I have this site to share with you all :)

Hugs!

Humana

I just have to put the CD thing behind me sometimes and just be my male self. Especially around family and friends during holidays. Sometimes I enjoy pretending to be feminine and I just look at it like this is acting to be the male side of me. I think some are more on the female side than I am so could be harder for them but I feel Jaylyn is just a part of me and I feel she is not the major percent of my life. I'd say I'm 65-70 % male and maybe the rest is a female feeling side. Luckily I still can control when I want Jaylyn to appear and disappear.

Hang out with the girls, talk about shoes, hairstyles, and babies.
I did this for years, and all they figured was that I was gayer than a French horn.
We all have our own comfort levels.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by I Am Paula

Hang out with the girls, talk about shoes, hairstyles, and babies.
gayer than a French horn.

---

ROFL!!! You made my day with that one Paula.
Thanks for the comments guys! Great to know that I'm not alone!
I've been talking to my mom a lot, she tells me about her facial creams, perfumes, clothes... I think they see me as a very feminine guy...
I just hate to have to hide a part of me that's so important. Maybe it's because of me recently getting out of the closet with CDing and I'm gonna need to control the need to yell it out loud to the world :o

Yep, I got frustrated, then asked my dad for permission to wear sports leggings (black cotton) and a shoe string singlet - he replied "whatever makes you comfortable"
so not the full girl, but close enough to relax me.

Well, absence makes the heart grow fonder, they say. So, after the holidays you'll appreciate your GF and the independence that allows you to express yourself. You can handle a few days, really you can!

French horns are gay? I love French horns....hmmmm.

I understand that you probably feel alone and frustrated but take heart soon it will once again be your time to shine.:)

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Kate Simmons

I understand that you probably feel alone and frustrated but take heart soon it will once again be your time to shine.:)

---

Thank you Kate! To put it in perspective, this is worth the wait, 'cuz getting crossdressed rocks!!! :D :D

The beauty of being CD is that you can turn it on and off, it's not something you need to do every minute of every day unless your not really CD at all. Enjoy your time with your family as is, things may change in the future, maybe, even as early as next year, you may tell all of them about this and be sitting there dressed, you never know.

There is always time for dressing at a later date and time ;)

the MOST awkward or nerve-wracking was a few Christmases ago where-in my Aunt & mum were talking about... CROSSDRESSERS!

one had said something about a woman whose husband was a crossdresser and how it was messing up their marriage (!) .. I think my mother said that (she's super against it!)... and my Aunt said something about ALSO knowing a woman whose husband was a CDer! ... small world!

and there I am nervous as all heck ... probably red-faced... wishing I could say SOMETHING or jump into the conversation ... but nope!

such is mango

When we go to a party or other mixed gathering I tend to hang with my wife, or the other ladies. Whenever I'm asked why I'm with the ladies instead of the guys I simply reply "The ladies are better looking than you guys!" I add my comments into the conversations as I deem appropriate.

I couldnt imagine any thing better than wearing heels and hose ect ang beig accepted

It is tough, but enjoy your time with your parents it often ends before you are ready (both my parents are deceased)

I agree with Bridget time with parents and family can be very short

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by DonnaP

I agree with Bridget time with parents and family can be very short

---

Yeah... I guess it's just that I'm so excited all the time about CDing (I got out of the closet with my GF like 1 month ago, so you can imagine :P). But everything in life has its moment, so I'll just relax and have fun with my fam!

Hugs!

I totally understand.....
I just got back from a 10 day trip to Orlando for a family reunion. Of course i was in male mode the whole time. I have my toes painted generally & my girlfriend asked if i was planning to wear polish or take it off before the trip. I juat had an awesome pedi, and I said that i will just wear sox, as my parents & my girlfriend & I wera all sharing a condo. So it goes, sometimes.....even though we may not like it, we have to just be in guy mode. I thought about revealing just my toes.....but i figured WHY....its just a few days. Anyway, back hoem & in fem......jus the way i like it.



Happy Holidays & all the very best to you!

Humana,
You really don't have to share your lifestyle with your parents, it may be frustrating but only a short stay really.
Save it till you get into familiar surroundings.

I had to quickly change clothes last night and go over to my Uncle's for a family get together. I mostly nodded my head as I stood in the kitchen listening to stories of hunting and fishing. I also had to be aware of any fem mannerisms that I might have adopted haha. But I learned a few things like - did you know you can fly fish for steelhead near a damn, and that steelhead really go for the color purple? I did get to compliment my female cousin on her festive sweater, but the night was more about fitting in with the men. Family is very important and must be appreciated before it's too late. Merry Christmas.

While my SO and I were out last night at her family gathering, her nephew, whom has very liberal parents was expressing his enjoyment while dressing up in different non-gender articles. My SO and I had great fun communicating non-verbally with each other about our dress up time, which is unknown to her family. Making the most of the moment, whatever it is.

Put on your lovely Christmas Dresses people it's the Holidays!

yee-haw!

Humana, most of us here - especially the closeted ones - can fully identify with your frustration, but it's all part of the burden that we carry as crossdressers and engaging in an activity that most people consider "peculiar" at best. The good news is that we have made great strides in becoming more mainstream in recent years due to increased lobbying for equal rights and opportunities across the whole human rights spectrum on the part of the LGBT community that we are also represented by, as well as having more and more of these enshrined in actual legislation. Maybe in your lifetime - but likely not in that of the more senior members here like myself - men openly wearing make up or what has traditionally been considered female garb will become as common as them sporting earnings and long hair already is, and that is something for you to look forward to.

That said, if I had a nickel for every post I have read here (including some of my own - LOL!) where someone expressed their frustration over having planned a full day of crossdressing in the expectation that they would have the house all to themselves, only to have a family member return home unexpectedly or else cancel a planned trip, I'd be a very wealthy CDer indeed. Yes, Murphy's Law is very much alive and well in our world as well, so we just have to learn to roll with the punches, look past the present, and as the saying goes "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again!" ;)

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Humana

I've been talking to my mom a lot, she tells me about her facial creams, perfumes, clothes... I think they see me as a very feminine guy...

---

Just be yourself and enjoy! :)

Major clothing designers (dominated by men):
http://www.celebritynetworth.com/lis...est-designers/

Top hairstylists (also dominated by men):
http://www.therichest.com/expensive-...-in-the-world/

Top chefs (not one woman in this list):
http://www.epicurious.com/articlesgu...s_thomaskeller

New Zealand is an easy place to be a CD, we are all fairly tolerant.
I got over the barrier of being with the women by doing some amateur hairdressing. I have always coloured and styled my wife's hair so I have been asked to style some of my aunties' and cousins' hair when we all get together.
Doing that has helped me to join the ladies if I want to,
Try it Humana, it may work for you too.

Humana - maybe you can sneak out to do a little shopping to help get you by? Keep posting here - that often helps too. Best of luck the rest of this holiday season !

Just goes to show "you can't go home again". Once you've left and started your own life you are no longer the same person and neither are those you've left, however fond (or not so much) your memories may be.

My in laws are coming here for a belated Christmas... and I have to stay closeted at my wife's request, even though her sister is an out of the closet lesbian dating a MTF transwoman. I feel the frustration, as I am spending today "de-femming" the house where needed. :(

Just girl up, Humana! The Holidays r the time of the year we must suffer our families. Only one lousy week?

If WE can do it, so can u!

One step at a time Sherry! ;)

I agree with just about everything written here--ok, everything.

Though I am so far behind you all, I can appreciate your sentiments and experiences. When I was a young man (early 20's), I bit the bullet, changed my major, and began my formal study of classical music. Where and when I came from, it was called "long hair" music, and automatically I was considered and treated as Gay--though that wasn't the term in common practice back then. When the "hippie" movement came in, the term "long hair music" took on a very different meaning, but I was still considered odd and suspect.

If only my old relatives and friends could read this :-)

Perhaps a different take on your comment: I enjoy my manhood. I like the feeling and rush of adrenaline rushing through my body when I tackle a strenuous task. Yet, I am one to cry at movies, and at classical concerts (tears flow freely and in anticipation of the end of "Die Gotterdamerung."

My point is this: we have many sides to us, so why not embrace and enjoy them all?

Vanessa

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Allison Chaynes

My in laws are coming here for a belated Christmas... and I have to stay closeted at my wife's request, even though her sister is an out of the closet lesbian dating a MTF transwoman. I feel the frustration, as I am spending today "de-femming" the house where needed. :(

---

surely if people can accept a lesbian dating a transwoman they can accept a straight gal dating a CDer!

come now!

I have been visiting family since Christmas and have not fully dressed en femme since then. I have been wearing female slacks and some female tops. I really miss being dressed as a lady but am going home tomorrow and will get to do it for the next few days.