Planning on going out in public soon!!:)

So a bunch of my GG friends want to take me out and go shopping. I have never been out in public all dressed up, but they finally convinced me that I should just go out and be me:) I am extremely nervous!!! I have planned out like a thousand different outfits in all my excitement:) My friends have even offered quite a few of their clothes to help make a perfect outfit:) We are planning on doing this in about two weeks from now (thats when all our schedules match up). But I have a few questions, and since many of you on this forum have gone out in public, I figured I'd lean to you for help:)

1. If passable enough, should I just use the ladies room?? Or still just go into the guys?
2. How did you teach yourself to walk feminine?
3. How do you over come your fear?
4. Best ways to stay tucked for a whole day?
5. Should I do jeans or a skirt?
6. How do I make my voice more feminine?

P.S. I am a bit passable from what my opinion. I want to be as feminine as possible, it has always been my dream to spend a day out as a girl. I've attached a few photos, let me know what I need to do to look better:) Thank you!!!!:)

Here are a few more pictures:)

Relax, Mia, you're going to be fine!

First of all, your pictures show a lovely young woman with a sense of style and damned good body language.

Secondly, the best way to "pass" is to be with a group of GGs. Many CDs think, "Oh, no, I'll stand out by comparison," but no, if you are hangin' with GGs it's like you've already been vetted so anyone else will see you as just one of the group.

1. If passable enough, should I just use the ladies room?? Or still just go into the guys?

I would not suggest going into the guy's! Best bet, when one or more of them heads for the ladies' just go right in with them. Only possible problem then is being a part of the conversation while you are in the stall if other women than your group are present (Persephone's Rule: Don't talk where you can't be seen).

2. How did you teach yourself to walk feminine?

Practice, practice, practice at home before you go! Basically, keep your legs from top to knees together. I try to think of myself as sort of ice skating (something I've never done) by sliding off the inside of my foot. That seems to add a bit of a wiggle to the walk. You can work to get it down while you are at home but when you are out try not to think about it, just enjoy your friends and let your walk take care of itself.

3. How do you over come your fear?

You should be pretty carefree after the first few minutes, you have the best of all possible worlds, a posse!

4. Best ways to stay tucked for a whole day?

Depends upon your physiology. There are whole sticky throeads on here about tucking. Pick your favorite method and try it at home.

5. Should I do jeans or a skirt?

When you are with other women this is often a group decission. Ask your closest friend in the group what she is wearing and go with the pattern.

6. How do I make my voice more feminine?

There are a few threads about voice on here that have some helpful hints. But in general women engage each other's faces and eyes when they speak to each other and lip-read more than men do so if you speak softly your message will still generally get across, even with waitressses, SA's, and the like.

Smile, be pretty, and get them to use your femme name and you'll be more than fine.

You are going to have a great day! Please share it with us afterwards! Preferably (but not necessarily) with pictures!

Hugs,
Persephone.

1 - your way more passable than me, but I still use the ladies toilet.
3 and 4 - get bigger balls and wear smaller underpants.
5 - go with similar style as the GGs.
2 & 6 - don't bother, or get out with the girls and practice

Look people in the eyes and smile, it really is amazing fun out there :)

Thank you!!:) I really appreciate all the help! I will practice walking for the next two weeks then!:) Thank you again!!:)

Mia,

You look great. I think you'll do well. As many of us here have found out, our greatest fear is in our mind. We make a big deal out of what usually is nothing. Go out & enjoy yourself.

A bit of constructuve criticism, I see a little beard shadow in your pics. Maybe it's the pic. If it isn't the pic, try a little concealer. Your GG friends can help with that.

Kim

FYI, If they go with skirts, you won't need to tuck. A tight pair of panties will do, especially if the skirt is flowing or A-line.
You may not even need to tuck if your slacks aren't tight.

I agree with Kim, make sure your beard is covered. It will stick out like a sore thumb.

I think one of the biggest things is to be able to relax and be confident. Fake it if you have to. :) I know it's not easy when you're first starting out, but will hopefully come with time. And don't worry if things don' go perfectly. They rarely do, in this or anything in life. So, if you can go with the flow and take it in stride, with a sense of humor, you can not only survive it, but have a good time, too.

Bottom line - have fun and don't take any of it too seriously.

What a treat to have some GG friends to help you! :)
Hopefully you can think of some ways to show your appreciation of them, to them.

I'll just say that you look amazing! You won't have any problems in the outside world along with your GG friends. So enjoy the ride. Make the best out of every second out!
Hugs!
Gabriela

yes Mia, you look awesome and you'll have some of the best protective service there are for cd'rs, GG friends. You'll know they will totally have your back

You look fabulous, good luck and have fun :)

I can only add two minor things: (a past girlfriend told me these two) 1. In the bathroom, be careful to point your toes inward while sitting - it helps push your knees together. 2. While walking, "point your toe, and plant your heel" - in other words, take smaller steps than you normally do, and point your toe where you intend to step, but put your heel down first; you don't want to prance. If you keep your upper legs and knees close together, your hips will automatically sway, because they have to, in order to place one foot ahead of the other, (but not in a straight line, or overlapped - you aren't on a fashion runway)


By the way, if you are practicing walking at home, it really helps if you can make a video of yourself walking away from the camera and watch it.

Mia, you look fabulous. I sure you will have a great time. It's awesome that you have GG friends that support and help you.

Thank you everyone for the compliments and advice!:) It all means a lot, and I will definitely be using all this information to help me out:)

"How did you teach yourself to walk feminine?"

Don't give yourself a role to play, just be feminine,let it come out. Sounds to simple but try it.

Nothing more to add other than my best wishes for a wonderful day with your friends.

I'm so jealous!

You look FAB-U-LOUS but as a few already pointed out, some concealer for the shadow is needed. Other than that, you look GG all the way!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Mia27

...
1. If passable enough, should I just use the ladies room?? Or still just go into the guys?
2. How did you teach yourself to walk feminine?
3. How do you over come your fear?
4. Best ways to stay tucked for a whole day?
5. Should I do jeans or a skirt?
6. How do I make my voice more feminine?

P.S. I am a bit passable from what my opinion. ...

---

1) as many will agree, you use the restroom of the gender in which you are presenting. Do your business and leave. Go in with one of your girlfriends if that make you feel better.
2) You walk. One of the main difference sis the male stride length. Wearing skirt actually helps moderate your stride as you feel it when you stride too long. You don;t have to exaggerate your hip swing or anything like that. Walk with your feet closer together than normal and take shorter strides.
3) Your fear is in your head. No one cares. My only advice is to stay away from where drunk men are congregating.
4) Tucking is over estimated here. Unless you are wearing a spandex mini skirt or dress, you don't need to do any more than push your penis down. Wear snug underwear and you'll be fine. Tights or pantyhose will will further flatten. If you re wearing pants, like skinny jeans, wear a long shirt to cover your front.
5) I prefer skirts and dresses but it depends on where you re going. Ask what your friends are wearing and go with that.
6) It takes years of practice to do it well, but one thing you can do is simply push the words out less hard. Don't use your throat muscles, just breath. Start in a higher register if you can.

Now, about passable. None of us are passable. Don't worry about that. No one cares. Don't be looking for people looking at you. Some will, many will just keep their heads down. Smile, make eye contact. The more at peace you are, the easier a time you will have. It's all about confidence. You will find that you forget you are dressed at times. Have fun.

hi mia, try this for voice,
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...ighlight=voice
you got nice teeth show them off, if you feel uncomfortable or feel someone staring just look at your cell phone, youll blend right in

Mia, I can't add anything to all of the great advice you've had from everyone else, except to say that it gets better and more more natural the more we get out. It's great that you can do your first time out with your GG friends -- they'll be a wonderful source of support. More of us should be so lucky!

And -- oh -- those eyes! Keep smiling and enjoy!

Hugs,

Claire

That sounds like such a wonderful plan. You are indeed fortunate to have not just one GG friend who is so supportive but a group of them. You've received much good advice regarding your questions so I'll not repeat them but just add one regarding your personality and behavior when out with them - just be yourself. Don't think you have to act 'girly' . Most likely you will overdo it if you conscienctiously have to think about it. Clearly they already like you for the person you are so don't mess that up with trying to be someone you are not. Also be a careful observer of how they handle themselves. For example how they carry or manipulate their purse, etc. Ask them for 'coaching' in real time if they see a major fopa. Relax and savor the day.

Just to start off I think you look great and I'm sure you will do just fine. I really hope you have a great time. I've still never cross dressed outside of my home I think I would be really nervous to do so and probably chicken out. So I have to say I admire you for making the steps towards your first time in public. Once again good luck and most importantly enjoy yourself.

Lots of good advice here already Mia, so just try and have fun; smile, and a positive attitude really goes a long way. You look just great!

Jamie

you look very pretty and feminine I wear tight pair of panties to tuck

You look fairly passable to me, so just go out and have fun! There's some videos on youtube to help you walk feminine, basically try to take shorter steps with legs closer together than when walking as a boy. As for what to wear, look at what other GGs are wearing at this time of year to get some ideas on that

For your first time out I would recomend jeans. They are the norm for women shopping and you dont need the added stress of trying to navigate this new experience in a skirt. You can try that on your next outing.

I learned a decent walk by trying to keep my thighs touching while I walked. And dont look down, keep your head up and smile. Females generally smile more than males.

Enjoy! You'll love it!

Sounds like a dream - friends who want to help and will even loan their clothes to you.

Enjoy and have a great time!