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I have periodically purged when the need to dress was at a low point.I threw my brown open toed high heeled sandals out. My all in ones met with the same fate. My bestest tightest white Adonna panty girdle got disposed of in a fit of passion. I regret each of these purges. I can go weeks with the need but when it returns it is all I can think of.
What's a girl to do? Guess I am just an emotional female even if it is only temporary
Purging usually never works my last one was years ago, never again.
It's best to just store your things if you feel the need to put a halt to things, or just embrace this as a part of you and
enjoy it for what it is
You are so right
The worst kind of purge is when your spouse finds your things and destroys them. :sad:
:)one thing to ay...it never goes away
Been there done that. I too have thrown countless amounts of clothes that I ended up regretting. Now I know that I will always wear women's clothes on and off forever.
You're right, it doesn't. I haven't logged on here in years, and yet, here I am. The keys for me were learning to accept this is a part of my personality and that I am a worthy person even with this characteristic, but it doesn't have to control me. I spent a lot of money talking with a psychologist about all of my crap -- things that had nothing to do with crossdressing -- and that helped. In the end, I ended up applying my therapist's comparison of this to alcoholism, that the desire will wax and wane. It can lie dormant for months at a time and still surge. For this reason, I will not purge.
Another thing I learned from all that therapy was that the urge to dress up or transition is tied to how fulfilled I feel in the rest of my life. If I am marking time and going through the motions of life, or if I am unhappy, Nancy surges forward. If, on the other hand, I am doing well, enjoying my work, helping out with the charities I like to support, and enjoying my true passion (bicycling), then she remains in the closet, waiting until I need her.
I hope this is some help to you. Learn to accept yourself, and don't ever, ever give up.
Kendra Sue,
I lasted about 7 months last year but could not stay away..
@ Helen,
My wife found my stuff & threw them away decades ago.
Still hurts but what IS WORSE is when you give away all your stuff yourself !
At least I have an additional tax deduction for last year.
Hugs, Connie Marie
Exactly. Mine comes and goes. Right now, I'm feeling the urge, and will play a bit. This will go on with me until I become too busy with my other life. One cannot ignore the everyday world. One thing I will not do, is purge. If you can, put your clothing away in a closet. Out of sight, out of mind. It will be ready for your return, you won't wish that you tossed something you loved when you got it. Or, you might just go back, and start saying to yourself, "Why did I save that?" and you'll toss it-but replace with something you like better.
It doesn't go away. I'm just glad I've accepted that fact so I don't think of entirely purging. Occasionally I'll get rid of a few things, but I've cone to grips with the fact that this is something that's a part of me.
To many times i purged never worked .The last time i purged was the day i split with my wife 10 yrs ago .She said your going to regret throwing that out and this is after always her saying i could quit if i wanted to .Hmmmm it will come back !:)
Sue,
My feelings are 24/7 so it never goes a way, no ebb and flow and no purging besides for some years they were clothes from my wife anyway.
Sue,
No it will never go away, it is a part of my make up, how I am wired, how I want and feel I want to be. Its a need to feel and be feminine for some it is as and when for others of us it is all the time. I have said previously it is something you cannot fight against, and why should one?. I just go with the flow and enjoy every moment I can of being dressed.
I've done three or four purges in my life but I always end up back in panties slipping a skirt on. I don't regret the purges as they are what I needed at the time but I don't like to think about the wasted money and dozens of bras, panties, skirts and blouses that all hit the trash or goodwill. The urge to dress en femme never fully went away and it always returns bigger and stronger.
I've purged more than I would like to have for the most part due to a move. I had no idea how to move my stash without getting caught. The urge never went away and I lost a lot of nice things that I will never be able to replace such as some lovely garter belts and stockings and beautiful floral print Vanity Fair panties that they no longer make. But as soon as I found a suitable hiding place, I have always done what any gurl would do - go shopping!
Hi, Kendra! Do not purge! It is a waste of time and clothes! The urge will return to you and usually stronger than ever! I was married for 34+ years and only wore panties 3-4 times for those years! Then wham like a tidal wave it hit! Had to run to K Mart and buy panties and the urge just grew from there! It is not going away! Hugs Lana Mae
Hi Kendra Sue :hugs:, Crossdressing is like the Mafia, YOU JUST CAN'T QUIT ! ...:daydreaming:...
Purging NEVER NEVER NEVER works my dear. The desire to dress again will return and when it does it comes back with a vengence. I say this because I have done exactly the same thing (PURGE) everything. I have come to accept who I am, NOTHING IS GOING TO CHANGE THAT but I will "satisfy the purge god when I do get rid of some things that I don't wear, don't like or worse still something that doesn't fit. (did you know that when something hangs in your closet to long without wearing it "shrinks"). I discovered that over the years.
Mollyanne
And then you get to a point where you understand that the desire to purge is only temporary. You wait it out and sure enough, you're glad that you didn't pitch anything. Eventually your collection gets so big due to the desire to shop, that you start running out of room. I'm at the point where I'll be gleaning out all of the stuff that I just don't wear anymore and donating to charity. It's where I got most of it anyway. Of course, there are those things that just have a sentimental attachment and won't be parted with.
Never purge because the urge will never go away. No matter how long it is between dressing sessions. I will often have weeks go by where I don't dress or can't.But the urge is always there
I've never purged, never felt the urge to do so. I do try to get rid of items that I know I'll never wear again, stuff that may come back into fashion (near the end of the century) or if they invert a twenty years younger pill. So knowing I'll not wear something again it gets sent to the charity shop and that makes room for something new for me to shop for.
I've NEVER understood why T's purge!:eek:
It seems the same as throwing all the food in your frig away because u go on a diet!:brolleyes:
Why not just put your stuff away in a suitcase in the attic instead? Then, in a year if u still haven't felt the desire to dress? THROW IT OUT!:thumbsup:
Yeah it never does go away. I purged for the third or fourth time a little over 6 years ago. I'm back and the urge/desire is stronger than ever. I FINALLY accept that there is a feminine part of my personality and I refuse to lock her up anymore. It's not good for my health and well being. In my short time back I have done things (makeover at Sephora and shopping at a mall) that I'd only dreamed about doing for many years. I am never purging again!
My SO did a purge right before we married. (I did not know). That was the last purge and it was 37 years ago. Occasionally things are removed from the wardrobe, but only because they are no longer used.
I too have purged several times. Big mistake every time. I have also lost things I can never get back, simply can't find them or won't pay the price. I will never do it again. And I agree with things shrinking when left in the closet too long. That is a great line. Love it!
I had quite a few Purges as a teen and would cut everything up so I couldn't change my mind.
Three weeks ago after I told my wife the whole story about my CDing she called me every name in the book.
Told me I need to go for therapy.
I was feeling bad and was planning to PURGE everything but it was all 10 miles away in storage.
My plan now is to purge about half of it. Try to make it presentable so I don't look like a crazy person if someone finds it.
The last urge I had to purge, I packed everything up and put it in the attic. When the desire to dress came back (as I suspected it would), taking all my stuff out of the attic was like a combination of Christmas and a reunion with old friends!
When I want to "purge" I do the same thing as Bailee. I put everything in a suitcase and then put it up in the attic in a hard-to-reach place. When I get it back down from the attic, it's because I really, really need to get it down. Actually pretty soon it will have to be two suitcases at the current rate.
Sometimes I cull stuff I no longer want but even that's rare now. I "cull" in the same way, put it up in the attic until I decide I want to wear it again. The only thing I'll routinely throw out is pantyhose with runs in it, or worn out panties, or something that just doesn't fit.