I am absolutely in love with my husband. He is attentive, present and so sexy. I adore his goatee, c$&@ and heart. From the very first time he kissed me, I knew we had incredible chemistry, we connected.
I recently found out my husband kissed another woman. I was... devastated. I loved this man, I strove for his happiness. My beloved tried to tell me that he liked to dress as a woman and I giggled. I let him dress, I did his makeup and I LASHED OUT when it was apparent he loved it. I didn’t understand and I thought he was gay.
That was it, I told him I need my husband to be a man, I’m not attracted to women and he just never brought it up again.
Fast forward 5 years and I feel a difference in our relationship, he’s distant and hiding things from me, I put this aside as part of the fact he had been laid off and was struggling to find a new job. After 3 months of unemployment, I couldn’t understand how such a smart, charismatic man could go on so many interviews yet have no offers. I googled his name and I was shocked, there he was posting about how his wife doesn’t understand his need to wear women’s clothing. It was on another site geared toward hook ups, I was crushed.
I screamed, I cried, he cried.... My fairy tale marriage was unraveling. Why? I needed to know why!
He began to tell me about the overwhelming need to dress and he was turning outside the marriage looking for his own answers and acceptance. I called BS, it was simply cheating to me.
After some heartbreaking time passed, our communication got better. I asked A LOT of questions and he answered openly and honestly. Hours and hours of just talking, I learned so much about him. One day he sent me a link to a kindle book, My Husband Wears My Clothes, I read it non stop and it triggered more questions. “The author said this.... how do you feel about that?” Over and over and by the time I got to the end of the book, I was crying again, all the time. I couldn’t believe how I had treated him, that I made the most important person in my life feel SHAME was absolutely horrible and I couldn’t apologize enough for it.
I told him I would work hard at accepting this but I needed baby steps. We decided together that he would sleep in a nighty that night and the next morning, the baby steps were out the window! Although this may not be best for everyone, I asked him to feel free to just be him, just be himself(or herself)!
Watching and helping him transform into this beautiful woman was and is still amazing. I love doing her make up, helping select clothes, styling her hair, etc.... Shes gorgeous and if possible, sweeter, more attentive and passionate when all dressed up.
I haven’t gone out with her yet, neither of us are ready yet, small community and we’re not sure about how to tell the kids, family or friends, we’ll get there. We’re planning a trip out of town to break the ice, so to speak.
When we shop together, I’ll hold up a dress or a top and ask “do you think she’ll like this?” Or I’ll use her name “.... would look so pretty in this.” He’s done this for me so many times over the years, I feel bad that he had to wait so long to enjoy the same feeling. Bonus- he can’t complain at all anymore when I buy new clothes, his wardrobe is quite expansive!
We’re in a much better place, our marriage is amazing and I love ALL of him. NOW- now it really is a fairy tale marriage. I know this isn’t for everyone but I would advise any wife who is struggling to understand or accept to first seek information, read, educate yourself. If you love that person, they deserve to be loved wholly and unconditionally. She is my Person!
