What would you do with your feminine stuff if...

you KNEW you only had a few months to live? I just found out a very good friend of mine has cancer and was given the choice, chemo and 6-9 months or no chemo and 3-4 months. He chose no chemo, so he knows he will be gone soon. It got me to wondering, what if I was told that? What would I do with all my stuff? My wife knows and is tolerant, but would I want to make her get rid of all my feminine attire after I'm gone? Two things came to mind, 1) I really don't want to burden her with it, and 2) I don't want her to know how much stuff I really have (I think I might be surprised also). I think as the end got near, I would ask her what she wanted me to do. But, I would probably pack it up as I'm sure I would not feel like dressing. I know this has been discussed before, but it is really close to home this time.

I am in a DADT marriage with a wife who is not appreciative of my desires to wear women's clothing. She makes no comments. No snide remarks. It's the ostrich effect. Hide with head in the ground. She has no idea of the extent of my feminine wardrobe. I would donated usable garments to a charity which provides attire to women at a battered women's shelter. Many of those women flee bad marriages with nothing more than the clothes on their back. Most of the 160+ dresses are suitable for work. I have plenty of unworn intimates which would be welcome. Things that were not suitable for donation would be discarded. I would also dispose of many of my collectibles and hobby artifacts as I would know where and how to get the biggest buck. If you leave it to a wife to dispose of everything it would probably be a psychological burden.

I have no regrets, so I would not do anything with them, except maybe pick out an outfit I would like to be creamated in. (My wife and I have both agreed on creamatiom)

My things would be donated by me at a charity shop as soon as I found out as I wouldn't have a need anymore so wouldn't be a problem for my wife.

I would likely let anyone I'm out to by that time go through and take what they want and whatever was left would be donated to Goodwill or something. Who knows, maybe someone here might find something they like :)

3 to 4 months is plenty of time to get rid of everything. However, I ain't dead yet so I would have to burden her with the few things I need until the time to go is here.

Nothing special. Wife knows and accepts. Don’t see how getting rid of that stuff would be any more difficult than my other stuff.

Yes my family and GG know what to do with my stash and body.
I need to do some more work on my will. As for My stuff, I need to Write up an additional page to my codicil telling the exatcutor what to with my jewelry and wardrobe. Though I am getting older I could be dead in the next moment. An un-notarized will is just a dream sheet and carries almost no weight unless it is double witnessed by non- recipients and a notarial. in good health at the age of almost 75, I learned to have a will ASAP because you have no idea when you will be gone. And as we grow older the probability of you passing gets closer.
So Everyone, Make a Will and have it notarized. Make 3 copies. A codicil is an attachment to your will that tells who gets what but can be changed at any time without disturbing the will.

My wife knows so I wouldn't do anything special probably.

I would keep everything, dress a bit more and toward the end totally stop and give it all away

I'm lucky, my wife would take care of my fem wardrobe, if I die before her.

I would donate all my stuff that was any good to charity . I'd call the game is over. My wife knows but why would I want her to be burdened with my stuff. She will have plenty of things to do.

Like most of you, I would donate all of it to a charity organization. I might save a few of my favorite outfits to wear during my last days.

Pretty common question and there have been lots of threads on this subject.
Do a forum search and read past threads.

Donate what I could and toss the rest. I wouldn’t want to leave it for my SO to deal with.

Probably give it away to the member here?:battingeyelashes:

Don't get excited! I'm only 75!:Angry3:

If that happened, i would donate the reusable things in goo condition, and throw away what is not suitable. No wife or kids, just me and my cats. I need to make a will and get it notarized. 64 yo.

My wife knows where most of my fem stuff is. I would not change anything and I feel pretty confident that my wife would take care of the issue of my female clothes. But I am confident that that will be many many years down the road for both me and my wife. We are both too young to worry.

My wife knows, so really no issues. She would probably give some stuff to her daughter who is the same size as me.

I've thought too much and too often about this and have written my wishes down for whoever finds my stuff. It's all out in the open, my wife has already passed away, my kids and a growing number of others know I'm trans, so that's the biggest issue, no surprises for them. I want the body shaping things to be available to another trans person, the jewelry should be put out for people to take with them following whatever service is done and the clothes and shoes can go to charity. If I know I'm going to die, I'd like to parcel it out on my own, but I've seen what serious illness and treatments can do to someone's strength and other abilities, so the note with my wishes will have to do.

I'd try to leave as least of a trace possible. Houdini style!

Another "what if" Really!

I have thought about this too and being single I don't have a wife who would discretely dispose of everything in the event of a sudden death. Not sure siblings could handle it sorting through a lifetime of clothing. Easier if you have the time and know you are going to die in a month or two to start the cleanout. I have started sorting and donating clothes but everything still fits and I am attached to it even though I might never have worn it.

Wow great question. I thought of this several times and I am also DADT. If I only had a little time I would probably purge and get on the best I could.

I would send my forms one by one to my ex wife followed by all rest piece by piece!!

Like many others on here, I'd donate my stuff to charity.

I would let my wife donate it all or keep.
Only things of my fem-wear she fits is my heels. ]

I would get rid of everything and spend as much time with family as possible.
I think dressing would be the last thing on my mind.

Early one morning a great big garbage bag would find its way to a great big dumpster.

Might be a good time to come out of the closet. Start dressing everyday - go out and buy cloths you've always dreamed of.

For those out maybe they would carry on, those in the closet I feel would lose interest as there is a new and interesting facet to their lives.

Like when young finding a girlfriend shifts your interest away from dressing for a while.

When I say a new and interesting facet I mean focus is on remaining alive.

Terminal illnesses are one of the most heart wrenching for anyone involved.

I would stop and get my affairs in order for the rest of the family, I doubt I would miss it under those circumstances.

Okay I only had prostate cancer and it was operated on some years ago, but for three months my whole life passed before my eyes.

I continued my activities in the usual manner.

You don't know how happy I am to be able to give advice here today, :-)

Yes keep smiling and enjoy life.

Yes ....If I were you I would pack it and ask my wife to send them to who ever need these outfits ...to enjoy them as I did ,,,,Yet now I'm having two closets of these lovely fortune of dresses and I find it very difficult to give anybody ...Im so attached to them ...became my joy and relief .....but if Im gone I will let go ....especially if I know good friends like me ..I will send as a gift .

If I had only a few months to live, I would...
1. Tell my wife that I want one last big fling where I could do something, anything, fully dressed.
2. Tell a few family members a few things about myself that they never knew, and express my love for them at the same time.
3. Load boxes up of my feminine stuff and deliver them to GoodWill.
4. Only hold on to a few important sentimental things that will be easy for my wife to dispose.
5. Make final arrangements, get myself in good standing with my family, friends, and my faith.

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Originally Posted by Tracii G

Pretty common question and there have been lots of threads on this subject.
Do a forum search and read past threads.

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Tracii I am not picking a fight and apologies to butting into this thread but this forum is not just about reading - we have books for that. People want to discuss topics so a locked old thread is of little value in most cases and it begs the question as to why you read this thread why not just read the old ones again seeing as it bothers you.

I would donate mine to a goodwill shop long before it is too late, but whether i would want to spend more of my last months as becky could be likely and that fo course could have consequences for me.

Well I wouldn't do anything with my 'stuff' because I assume that while I'm still alive it may be useful to have clothes to wear.

I would try to wear a different outfit every day and enjoy the time I had left.