Wife asked bra size

My wife has known for several years I like to crossdress but she hasn?t liked it and I?ve tried to avoid dressing around her. I don?t want to alienate her or provoke push back. I?m ok with dressing intermittently but I hate not being able to talk with her about. Keeping things inside is just miserable.
So I steeled myself to ask if I could talk with her about it at times and she was great about letting me tell her I sleep more peacefully in a night gown and I like to wear bras even though they are by design constricting. I told her I can control what and when I crossdress but I can?t control wanting to crossdress. And none of it make sense to me but it?s just how I am. She listened without judgement or disgust or negativity.

I felt so relieved she was ok hearing that. I just want to be able to share my thoughts, fears, hopes and feelings with her. This was the closest I felt in a long while.

Then today she texted asking me to measure my chest for my bra size, I guess for a Christmas gift.( Of course I already knew I wore a size 40 bra.)

Anyway, I?m incredibly happy with my wife and marriage, and I think she is too. She means so much to me.

That was really nice of her.

It was nice. Small steps.

Hi Mermaiden, that is a nice story. I would certainly take baby steps as you would not want to spoil what progress you have made. I wish my wife would be like that.

Sandi

Hope she gets you a great bra for Christmas. I got a nice vivid red Vanity Fair bra and panty set for Christmas. The only problem is I bought it for myself.

Hun, that's great! Respect each other's boundaries. Even if she doesn't end up buying you a bra, be extra grateful for whatever gift she does get you. Even if it's an ugly tie or something! Lol

To echo what others have said, baby steps! The natural inclination is to rush in to what seems to be a wide open door, when the best action is to proceed more like a cat trying to decide whether or not it wants to come in through the newly opened door. I must say it is great news though. Like Macey said, be grateful for whatever she gets for you.

Don't forget to get her something as well!

Mermaiden, Good for you for having the courage to approach her for this talk. I have had similar talks many times and been very hurt and disappointed with the response, so no longer try. I hope you are right that her asking you about band width indicates intent of a future gift. If she follows through with this, it would be a wonderful acknowledgement of, and acceptance of, who you are. Please update us post Christmas as to whether this dream gift happens. Nancy

That's very cool!

Mermaiden, That's great.

Well if you get a bra for Christmas be sure and act surprised and thankful. At the same time, don't make too big a deal of it. Sherrii

Very nice. I'm glad your wife is relaxing her position on your dressing. Your situation is very similar to mine. My wife was initially concerned that I was gay or wanted to transition. One thing that seemed to help me is that my wife is slowly realizing that nothing bad happens when I dress. I'm guessing your wife, and many others, have the same mindset. Time and talking go a long way. Congratulations.

Congrats it looks like she maybe coming around.

Mermaiden,

That is so good to hear. I know how difficult it was in my relationship hiding and lying to my wife and best friend about who i really was inside. Now our relationship is building again on a foundation of trust and as an added bonus I often now return from my business trips to find several items that she purchased for me and we have a great time as i try on each item.
Have a Great Holiday and Merry Christmas

CD Rachel

You have a lovely life right now broaching things that were kept down before is mind liberating.

If she does buy you a bra, you might hope that it's a "Maiden form". Sorry. couldn't resist.

Mermaiden,
You wife sounds like she is trying to be a loving spouse - you are very lucky so give her back the love 2X!
BTW let us know how you make out with the bra! (a pic - if allowed - would be great)
Luv and hugs
Patti

My wife was a 42 or a 44 depending on the manufacturer.
I am a 52, so we could not swap Bra's.
Be she let me wear a bra around the house.
Rader

Great suggestion up-thread to be sure to get her something nice as well from your fem-side.

Good going

We need post Xmas pictures if she does; you needn't be wearing it.

I am really delighted for you mermaiden.

Your post was beautiful.

I hope this sharing brings you and your wife even closer than you clearly already are.......and I believe it will.

Hi Mermaiden :hugs:, Please keep us advised about this . >Orchid .00:daydreaming:00.

A few days ago she advised me there are two kinds of bras for men. She has been researching on line. She categorized bras as the flat chested kind or as pocket bras for breast forms. I admitted I had tried both and have size C forms. We agreed that a lot of online pictures show cross dressers in oversized breast forms. It was nice to talk openly about bras with her.

Bras for men? Hmmm, that is nice but I am pretty sure you would like a made for women bra. Sort of like panties made for men, not for me.

That's so awesome!