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Sometimes after a full day as Olivia, going out to the post office and grabbing lunch and my fave cafe I thin, what would life be like as Olivia all the time? Does anyone ever a little bit more than fantasize? I want to go out more soon so I hope I can make it happen, kinda feel like I need to take a trip too. Ahhh if dreams could be real right girls?
I think the CEO was parked outside my office chatting with my boss the other day hoping to see what I looked like in a skirt as I left for the day.
Unfortunately I forgot where I put the skirt I was going to wear that day and wore pants. I need to find that skirt!
He just put in a dress code. We can wear skirts but not shorts.
Marion
I would say that transitioning has been both my ultimate fantasy and my greatest fear. Reality is somewhere in between, of course. One of the best things you can do is spend an extended period of time, weeks not days, out in real life, doing everyday things. Then you will get a sense of whether living full time is right for you. Try it. You may be surprised by how much you like living as a woman.
PS: We humans tend to think in terms of Black/White, either/or. There is, of course, the option of medical and social transition, but I would guess that many of us can be quite comfortable living with something in-between. There are other equally valid and satisfactory options. Maybe life feels less confining if one recognizes and is able to live a life somewhere along the spectrum.
We are all different when it comes to transitioning. For some it is the only path to happiness in a generalized way; for others it is more of a fantasy. I explored transitioning about 10 years ago, but after further examining the characteristics of my identity and also spending time in support groups with those who are transitioning, I concluded that I was not like them with regard to my characteristics. I have not seriously considered it since. Your mileage may vary. For me those dreams, when they occurred, were real, but the result did not last long enough before I slowly drifted back to a form that included more masculinity. Plus, for me, there is the desire to comply with the wishes of my wife who does accept my gender but prefers that I use a more mixed expression. It is the "Happy wife, Happy life" pattern. For her "Happy husband, Happy life." Dang, it just doesn't sound as good. Point is it is a two way street.
I considered it once. Tried to live 24/7 as a woman and could not do it. I did not even make it through an entire day!
Kimdl,
You always have great responses, we value your input and experiences!
Davina
I was thinking about this last night. Sometimes I wonder if I could transition if I did not have the responsibility I do. But in the end I know I'll remain a male who sometimes crossdresses.
What does it mean to live as a woman? Is there some perceived benefit? With all the crap and discrimination heaped upon women, why would you want to transition? Being a woman is not all glamour; dresses and heels. If there is a mismatch between the outward physical manifestations and the inner self, then to remedy that seems to be a worthy goal. Women seem to have taken the bull by the horns and shaken society. No longer are they content to spend their lives in the kitchen. So, if I may ask, what is your (general you) perception of being a woman? "I can't" really means one chooses not to?
Trying to present as a guy I'd get gendered as female half the time in person and most of the time on the phone.
In my case gender discrimination is pretty much unavoidable.
I love to shop. I'm too small for guy clothes and boy clothes fit horribly.
I have a great diet and exercise routine that allows me to fit in flirty XS clothes and look good.
Marion
Same. Gave up trying to pull off the male mode a bit ago and gave in. Fortunately, had some good turns, and was able to cut out the part of my life requiring me to play that role.
Turns out, my reservations were unfounded, and so far, so good. Supportive friends help a ton!
I have wished I could transition. If I was born 40 years later than I was I may have done it. When I crossdress my desire is to actually be a woman. Unfortunately due to where I am in my life now and everything that brings to the table. I will just be a man dressing as a woman.
I've never had the desire to transition and am happy being a cross dresser. Living alone I get to dress and get out a lot and would be happy to spend 100% of my time in public en femme. But that is as far as I would go.
Its not going to happen. As Roxie pointed out its 40 yrs too late for me.
I think I would like to try some part of transitioning, perhaps starting with hormone treatments. From there, who knows.
If I lived alone, this is exactly how I believe I would choose to live. I, too, have no desire to transition.Quote:
Originally Posted by Fiona_44
I think about it a lot, can't happen I would lose everything I love (daughters and grandchildern). I fall in the 50 years to late cartegory.
Playing from the red tees would help my golf game. Just thought I'd add a little humor.
Tracy
The mental and physical toll on my mind and body are enough to stop me, plus the fact I am 6ft 5 and 200lbs. i have broad shoulders and would stick out like a sore thumb. I can't face the bullying/discrimination, the heartbreak of losing family and friends, the repeated having to explain my story...
Realize that with all the surgery in the world, you can never be an actual "female". You might look like one, you might even learn to sound and act like one, but the best you can do is "transwoman". And only the lucky few will ever pass as a female. Many of us are far too tall or stocky to ever pass as a female even with $100K worth of surgeries and treatments.
We may think all our problems would go away if we could only have boobs and a vagina, but the reality is, women don't have it better than men. They still must deal with problems and everyday situations.
As crossdressers, we can pretend all we want and then go back to reality when necessary. That works for me.
Krisi,
Perfectly said. If I could say a magic word to be able to switch back and forth between my male self and an actual GG body, I'd love it. Until that happens, I'll settle for just enjoying dressing like one.
Stephanie
When I consider the life I have, if I had zero desire to cross-dress, I would not be unhappy: I have quite a bit going for me in male mode. BUT, I do like to dress up like a woman, now and then. I would need a situation like in "The Trouble With Amy" where I could change back and forth readily. I would not want to be or present fully as a woman for more than a day or so.
For any rational person, transition is a scary proposition, for any number of good reasons. If you have to do it anyway, you'll know it. If you don't have to do it, consider yourself lucky.
I'm w Krisi. Trans woman is as good as it gets for 99% So the majority of trans people will be treated differently and not equivalent to born female. So if natural womanhood has it's pitfalls, imagine life as a (visibly) trans woman.
I have dressed for seven or eight straight days on several occasions. Just everyday looks, not dressed to the nines or business apparel. Usually happens when we are on vacation or I am off work. I did it for ten days last year when I had to quarantine because I tested positive for covid. Tried the business look (shirts or dresses) for most of the days but I gave in and wore shorts or capri's a couple of days.
I think about it every day....and have been for years. However, for family reasons, I just can't transitioned physically, even if I have very long natural hair to waist and that my facial hair are mostly gone. I've been taking natural supplements recommended by a Health Care Professional for the last 2 years. It has helped me in feeling 100% woman on the inside.....
I've considered transition for a long time. I've given up on it, now, for social and financial reasons, but I think if I'd been more open about my gender issues when I was younger, things might've been different. Then again, money would still have been an issue.
But yeah, in the hypothetical magic scenario, I'd love being able to switch from male to female at will. Hell, I'm pretty sure I'd take the offer of a single-time switch as well.
From time to time I have the curiosity to come back here to read what was my life and keep reading the same excuses, financial, social, job, height, weight, etc.
I'm just 36 days after my GCS, yes, other can call it SRS others vaginoplasty.
I'm a federal employee that works everyday with unknown people, they could reject me but they don't do it. I never seen a double check on my, my body, face etc.
I was around a year with voice feminization therapy, my voice improved a bit but I don't sound 100% as a woman.
I haven't had a FFS, my hair is no longer long as it was for years.
Keep happily married living together with the same woman of the last 43 years.
In September I'll be 63 years old.
What am I? transwoman? transexual? a MIAD ? who cares, I don't have to give all the excuses I read here.
You know what I am? I'm not longer a dreamer, I'm not longer a cheater or liar to my family and the world.
I'm happy.
Hi Devi,
Congratulations on the surgery and finally being happy!
Marion
Same here, but reality tells us this can only be a fantasy.Quote:
Originally Posted by StephanieLake