Explaining the expression "crossdresser"

:2c:I would love to know the thoughts of anyone who would like to see the word "crossdresser" changed. Here's why, most words, we use are compound words, 2 combined into one new one, example TRans-Gender, Trans-sexual, Bi-Sexual, etc., Now maybe this is petty but crossdresser just doesn't support a meaning, for me anyway because..1) it doesnt really describe ME, and 2)it also is used to pertain to the OTHER compund names I've mentioned.
Now I understand if you are in a TRANSition to something else thats fine, BUT what if you LIKE BEING BOTH? Then there needs to be a distinctive word for it,... Petty am I? Maybe but my long hard thought on this subject has gone on for years. Whats your thoughts? Oh by the way my choice for a word to fit this >>> BI-GENDER !

Most of the time, the terms used to describe people's characteristics and maladies are selected by observers, professional or otherwise, and then find their way into the language. Transvestite and crossdresser are good examples, and there are a great many such terms in psychology: narcissistic, from the Greek legend of Narcissus; sadism, from the Marquis de Sade, and so on. Way, way too many to list here.

The only example I can bring to mind of a term that was promoted for use by the group it purports to describe and subsequently adopted for general use, is "gay." Unless I'm way off base, that term was originally used within their community and gradually became used by the general public.

Personally, I don't particularly like the term "crossdresser" either, yet it seems better than "transvestite," which is truly archaic. And this raises an important point. On an individual level we can truly assert that it doesn't matter what people call us, that it matters who we are. On a collective level, terminology is important. People who have no direct experience with those in our community form their initial opinions, at least partly, from the terms that are in common use. If those terms are clinical, or strange, or old fashioned, then people can't easily connect with the concept or the identity of our group. Terms that are used to highlight differences (and pathologies) also promote separation. I don't know about bi-gender. What do the rest of you think?

When I told my wife, I didn't use a label because I thought that it could easily imply things to her that I wasn't aware of. I just told her that I liked to wear women's clothing.

Sorry if this is a bit long winded. Seems you can take the professor out of the lecture hall, but you can't take the lecture out of the professor.

OK, fine by me.
If I'm a crossresser or a cross-dresser, I'm still a man who loves dressing as a woman and I don't think any punctuation will ever change that.

i to think "we" need a new word for those of us who are not transitioning.........we just like to wear the clothes,,women wear male clothes every friggin day,shit i even seen tv ads pointing this out..to promote them wearing mens clothes even more.....

the word gay used to mean your wer very happy,,,,

in old england male members of the government wore white tights and wigs...

Women wearing mens clothes?
Heaven forfend!
Whatever next?

I believe that with a lot of folks, especially the folks here, the original terms have become misnomers, especially with regard to one's personal evolution. A more apt description would seem to be alternative dresser or choice dresser in many cases.:)

I always settled for transgender but bigender sounds more accurate. I've always thought crossdresser and transvestite simply refer to the activity driven by a wide number of motivations. I don't like the medical connection of the following but I feel it is the clearest description of my point... These words relate to the symptom not the cause.
Yes I feel Bigender is one of the best descriptions I've heard.
Love Modesty

This is a very interesting topic and one worth considering for a poll. I think we all carry "labels" throughout our lives. Some are benign, some are descriptive and some are downright derogatory. I believe that both labels, crossdresser and transvestite were intended to be derogatory when they were originally used. Both terms have become common usage to describe a certain group of individuals but still carry derogatory overtones.

I think homosexual is a derogatory term just like some of the other labels placed on gay people. Webster's dictionary defines gay as joyful and happy, and I know a lot of gay people who are happy to be themselves. We need a descriptive non derogatory name to show who we are and that we're proud that we can display both sides of our personalities. Just a little food for thought here girls, perhaps we can start a movement toward a new descriptive name and new public awareness and understanding. Luv and :hugs: Jill

I actually disagree with some of the comments made so far

Crossdresser is a fairly gently word and is not as harsh as Transvestite
The majority of the public if asked would say they are both the same
and would most likely mix them up with transexuals too

I can remember when Gay was a word used for fun and happiness and was not used for to describe homosexual people
At one time Punk Rockers had a bad name but they were some of the nicest people you can meet

Language evolves over time and who knows in the future we may have a different description or the public will be better informed and not be so quick to jump to the wrong conclusions

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Originally Posted by Shelly_P

Crossdresser is a fairly gentle word and is not as harsh as Transvestite

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I definitely agree. And I think the term "bi-gender" has sexual connotations that may or may not be relevant for any given practitioner.

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Originally Posted by Becca

The only example I can bring to mind of a term that was promoted for use by the group it purports to describe and subsequently adopted for general use, is "gay." Unless I'm way off base, that term was originally used within their community and gradually became used by the general public.

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Another group that seems to be off to a good start at naming themselves is the brights.

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Originally Posted by Laurelanne

...what if you LIKE BEING BOTH? Then there needs to be a distinctive word for it

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Yes, yes. Back on topic, there was a good discussion in this thread:
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...ad.php?t=78350

Sonia :)

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Originally Posted by JessieB

I definitely agree. And I think the term "bi-gender" has sexual connotations that may or may not be relevant for any given practitioner.

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I like to dress up as a woman, nothing else that I'm aware of. So "bi" or "trans" doesn't apply to me.

I like Sal's, "alternative dresser"! Sounds better than "crossdresser", and is to the point! OK, that's my 2 cents.

If it was not "crossdresser" it would be something else.

Why is everyone so concerned about what "society" chooses to label us.........just enjoy being you...........life is too short.

:hugs:

Xx Vicky xX

My definition for crossdresser is a person of either sex that dresses in the clothing of the opposite sex, and nothing else. It may be full time, part time, that doesn't matter. It has nothing to do with the sex or gender of the crossdresser, and it is not a sexual thing. That does not mean that an individual crossdresser does not care about or is not involved in a sexual situation while crossdressing. I consider myself to be a heterosexual, transsexual, mtf crossdresser. If I eventually have srs, then I will consider myself to be a homosexual female. Descriptive terms are only useful if everyone is using them with the thought of the same definition. That is why myself, as most others here, tend to stay away from using labels to describe. If we have trouble following the definitions, imagine the general public that is not involved with anything related to crossdressing or gender issues.

the problem here is that we seem to forever wish to distance ourselves from anyone who is slightly different.
the term crossdresser applies to all of the above. if you had a word to describe every possible sub section of the transgendered, then no one would possibly be aware of them all, so it would have no point.
We are all so different that it takes conversation before anyone can really get any kind of notion as to what motivates someone else.

Oh Oh Oh!!!!!!!!!!!!! I Got It..............BI-DRESSER.............:d

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Originally Posted by Laurelanne

...it doesnt really describe ME

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Well it wouldn't - it simply says what you do, nothing about why and who you are because of it?

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Originally Posted by Carrie f

We, ‘being crossdressers.com’ are probably the single largest association of crossdressers on the planet. At the very least we could come up with a short list of possible names.

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Anyone else see a potential problem, here... :heehee:

First off, I'm answering this without looking at the other replies. To me, the term crossdressing is an action, something we do. The motivation for doing so is different for each of us. And that's where terms such as transgender, transsexual, etc, come into play. These terms speak to the reasons we CD. At least, that's my take on the term.

Call me what you want I just love doing it. :hugs:
Angie

Even something like ‘dressing progressively’ (progressive dresser etc) gets away from all the trans, bi, sexual etc stuff). What if the term was picked up by the media and became trendy. That's not hard to accomplish. Dressing progressively (crossdressing) could go from a subculture to mainstream over night. What an excuse to wear my flats or low heels and actually say to a friend or acquaintance, ‘hey, you should try this progressive dressing deal, these shoes are definitely different but they feel so cool’. Even if he doesn't want to he's not going to think you're a pervert. Or, more to a close friend. 'I just bought some lacy panties -- I'm wearing them right now. They're great, totally comfortable'. 'Don’t think there aren’t several million men in our countries who’d love the chance to wear at least some articles of women’s clothing. Maybe a new name and a fresh start for an old activity could make the difference.


I'd be willing to toss the idea around a bit if anyone's interested. I bet there's more marketing, media and communication expertise on this site than you can shake a stick at. Carrie


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"Hi Jane, is that your new athletic supporter ?"

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" I'll have to get one. It certainly looks roomy enough for my Gerbil, Hartogs"

"And they are on sale. You know, back in 2008 this kind of purchase would have made people very nervous. But there were gender rights pioneers on websites who just kept pushing until men were allowed to wear ruffled panties to Wall Street, and leave the trousers at home. And of course, WE get to wear athletic supporters !!!"

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Call my agent.

I like being an instigator for dynamic output of thoughts and ideas... welll, anything else let's keep going.:)

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Originally Posted by Laurelanne

Here's why, most words, we use are compound words, 2 combined into one new one, example TRans-Gender, Trans-sexual, Bi-Sexual, etc., Now maybe this is petty but crossdresser just doesn't support a meaning, for me anyway because..1) it doesnt really describe ME, and 2)it also is used to pertain to the OTHER compund names I've mentioned.
Now I understand if you are in a TRANSition to something else thats fine, BUT what if you LIKE BEING BOTH?

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Originally Posted by obsessedwithpantyhose

i to think "we" need a new word for those of us who are not transitioning

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You both make it sound like you think the word "crossdresser" is more applicable to someone who is transitioning. That's not conventional usage - when someone says "crossdressser", they usually aren't using it to describe a trans person. In fact, I'm pretty certain that the overwhelming majority of people who are transitioning do not consider themselves crossdressers.

I'm legally and anatomically female. The only way you can term me a "crossdresser" for wearing women's clothes is to completely refuse to accept my gender and sex as legitimate...

I am always happy when I wear women's clothes - not 'cross'.

Sorry for the pun. :P

crossdresser-sounds like the name of the person who dresses crosses :tongueout

when you look at all the clothing ads, they are ALL listed for their specific gender, <womens, mens, boy, girl> this in lies the problem, till we can get them to just advertize clothes for HUMANS the old caveman way of thinking, double standard is never gona change :sb:

how about <unisexdresser>

how about <ill wear what ever i feel like wearing dresser> or is that to long of a word :p

It doesn,t matter what label we give it, we,ll still be known as crossdressers to everyone else in the world!!

Why do folks always have to get hung up on labels. I never really gave much thought to them till I started reading this forum. I just thought of myself as someone who like to dress in either men or women's cloths and enjoyed doing it.

I hate labels. I am a man who likes to wear panties, pantyhose, bra, skirts, dresses, heels, etc. And make up.

BUT WOMEN DO AS WELL. Why should they like them, and it's wrong for me to do it.:sad:

So what? I came out ages ago. Cross dressing makes me feel good. I like it!!:D

I love nice clothes, well styled. Fook the world. ;)

Laurel Ann, I still think it's a good thread.

To some of the responses I got here and by e-mail, all I can say is ... Of course it was silly to try and come up with any ideas. What was I thinking. I'll be careful not to voice an opinion again. Consider my post deleted as of one minute from now.

I wasn't suggesting or recommending a name. Rather that a name change is needed. I was suggesting and recommending that there is enough brain power and ability on here to come up with a name and then do something constructive and positive with it. It isn't about not caring what you're called. It is about what others think. You know, the ones that beat us up, affect our social life, our careers and our families. Yeah, those ones. If they had a different perception of who we are, things might be different. And different terminology for who we are might be a good place to start. But it's just an idea. Oh man, there I go again. Ideas.

And yes I am pissed off. What's that expression about 70% of people watch life go by, 20% participate and 10% make things happen? Something like that. Well we have the ability to at least be part of the 10%
With a little ... forget it.