Join the club! I was always the class nerd. I got skipped a grade in elementary, so I got class runt added on. Then along comes puberty, and I get some nice man-boobs to go with the whole nerdy, scrawny package. You think you're the only one who's had it rough? I too dealt with years of studiously avoiding embarrassment.
Now here's where we differ, you and I. I got sick of my social phobias. I decided I wasn't going to let them rule my life. Singing karaoke turned out to be a good way to conquer that fear. The first time, I almost freaked out or fainted -- don't know which. But I got up there again. And again. Now I still can't sing worth a crap, but I no longer fear making an ass of myself in front of a crowd.
Sit down and think about this -- you are an adult. You say you're built like a jock. What do you really care about being made fun of? Does it affect your life in any way?
I say no.
But what does affect your life is fear. The fact that you might get in a car wreck won't keep you from going to the store. But fear of a wreck might. Fear is the most powerful human emotion. It can cause everything from paralysis to the most vile crimes you can imagine. How many Russians did Stalin kill, and why? Fear of losing his power.
Try this: think of something you've always been afraid to do. I don't care if it's roller coasters, skydiving, driving in the rain, or spiders. Pick one and conquer it. Then tell us about it. In fact, don't reply again in this thread until you do. Every post is about how bad your life sucks, and it's not going to change as long as you're negative about it. It's time you get out of your own way.