How I got caught in the worst way. How I survived.

Hey girls,

Just a word of warning. There may be some adult (sexual) content, but I will try to keep it to a minimum.

This is my first post. I've been lurking on here for the last few weeks and with such a supportive community I feel it is a good place to share my story of how I got caught (possibly in the worst way), how I handled the situation and what came of it.

So a bit of background info on myself. I'm 28, straight (though I sometimes fantasize about being with a man when dressed, so maybe bi-curious?), engaged to a woman I love very much and have a young daughter.

Now to my CDing... CDing has mainly been a sexual thing for me. At the age of 7 or 8, I remember becoming attracted to wearing female underwear. Unfortunately as I came from a family of 3 boys, I did not have access to any girls underwear so I would do things like find the smallest pair of underwear I could find and pulled together the back part to make it into a g-string which gave me a "funny feeling". At that point in time I didn't realise the feeling I was having we're sexual, but as I grew older obviously this changed.

(This is where the rating jumps up a notch)

So anyways, down the track a bit... Along with the CDing I also got into butt stuff. Never with anybody else, just doing stuff by myself. I loved the feeling of pretending I was the female in all the porn I watched, so I would often wear lingerie/panties/leotards/stocking (you name it) and film myself so I could watch it back later (BIG MISTAKE!). I even uploaded some videos (not showing my face of course) to some porn sites where anybody can upload to just for the thrill of the thought of other people being turned on by them.

As for my SO, up until a week or so ago she had no idea that I was even slightly interested in females clothing. We had occasionally done a bit of butt stuff with each other (a finger here and there), but only a couple times and it was never a big part of our sex lives. So anyway here's how I got caught. I was sitting at my computer after work playing some games as I like to do when my SO comes into my office. She says my name I turn around and she is standing there literally shaking. I ask her "What's wrong?", and she replies in a shaky voice, "What is the video on your phone?". I freeze. I know exactly which video she is talking about... It's me wearing a lacy black leotard, white stocking with little red bows at the top, trying out my new purchase... I couldn't believe she had seen it. My stomach sank.

She started to cry and asked again "What is the video!". I played dumb and said, "I don't know what video you're talking about!", hoping there was a slim chance she was referring to another video. She then continues to explain exactly which video it was and yes, my initial instincts were correct. I was BUSTED BABY! The things she saw in that video can never be erased from her mind I can tell you that for sure!

So what do I do? I fess up. I told her everything about myself and my CDing from when I was a young boy up until now. Many times during me trying to explain she would get angry and walk off but I would call her back, telling her we needed to discuss this like adults or it will wreck the family. She listens. And guess what! Mind blown! It turns out that the reason she is pissed off is because she was JEALOUS that I was having fun and doing exciting, adventurous stuff like that by myself and not doing sharing it with her! I jumped on the opportunity and told her I would love to do stuff like that with her and she told me I can wear or do whatever I want. I felt like a giant weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

So a week later and me and my SO are the happiest we've been for a long time. I am happy I don't have to hide things any more and she is happy that she knows something so intimate about me which she can share in. She has even offered me some of her panties which she doesn't want anymore.

I have also noticed that going through this has helped me evolve in my CDing too. Before where I found dressing to be mainly a sexual thing, I now don't see it as a perverted thing I need to hide and associate purely with sex. I can walk around the house in some tights and a slip just feeling good about myself being who I am! This just goes to show that no matter how bad you mess up, if your SO truly loves you they will accept you for who you are and there is no need to be ashamed like I was!

Thanks for letting me join this great community and sorry for the long post! I will hopefully post up a nice DP at some point!

P.S. I did not get caught on purpose. I had deleted the video from my phone but was unaware Apple keeps deleted photo for a further 28 days.

Glad things went well - it does seem that keeping secrets is more damaging to a relationship than cross dressing

So glad everything worked out for the best. That could have been a very bad situation. My wife and I at the start of our dating till now 47 years later we have always been like a n open book to each other. Most women want to know what makes their husbands tick and we want to know what makes them who they are. Even though we all change as time passes you always have some one that can get your back if need be and someone you can love and trust. I hope you learned a lesson and share everything with your SO.
Also remember Apple and that 28 days keeping a photo. Never saw a purpose for that but guess maybe somebody has one.

Whew! Dodged a bullet there, girl - I was expecting it to go the other way. Look up the thread about the good ole pictures on your phone, and you'll see why doing what you did is in general a bad idea. I AM glad that everything turned out all right in the end, but you had no idea it would go that way, either.

I loved the feeling of pretending I was the female in all the porn I watched" Wait, becoming a woman and be f*cked was funny? I'll try

Sorry but I feel sorry for you

Ok glad it didn't turn out badly for you this time.
Now just to let you know she may change her mind any time down the road and all of this dressing freedome may come to a crashing halt.
She seems to like the kinky part of it and thats fine for your sex life for now.
There have been many here that take a situation like this and feel they have a green light to push the boundaries farther and farther.
She has a limit of what she will tolerate out of her man so keep that in mind please.
Porn seems to ruin a lot of marriages so keep that in mind too.
You are young and think you have it all figured out but when you deal with women the more they know about you the more they can use against you if the marriage goes south.
I wish the best to you both I really do.

Great reading this account of how a potential disaster turned out to be the opposite with a new positive dimension added to your relationship. Best wishes for the future.

An exceptional story and an outcome that is truly amazing. You are very lucky

Welcome to the forum, Kas! :wave:


Question for you...

Were you ever planning on telling your bride-to-be at some point, voluntarily? Or were you just going to keep it a secret? :strugglin

Kas, welcome to the forum! Glad everything worked out for you and your SO! Keep communication open and be honest and tell the truth and it will greatly help your relationship! Hugs Lana Mae

im glad youve reached the part where you enjoy dressing rather than it being an only sexual thing. i think the reason it becomes a sexual thing is because we arent allowed to explore it and dress up like a girl so it becomes something you shouldnt be doing so then you sexualize it instead of embracing it, the enjoying it part is alot more fun if you ask me =)

Laurababe,

I was certainly thinking about telling my SO at some point. Doesn't mean that would of actually ever happened though knowing me... I suffer from anxiety so I find it hard to talk about anything I consider embarrassing. I'm sure she would have found out sooner or later though some how so it wasn't a total surprise I suppose.

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I completely agree, tarauhhhh. Because it is still such a "taboo" to be CDing, I guess I just subconsciously lumped it in together with sex/fetishes and never had a proper think about what it meant for me deep down.

Also traciig, that is a good point I didn't consider. I suppose she married a man and therefore would like her man to at least act like a man some, if not most of the time. I will be careful to not push it too far too quick.

So very True.

Kas, welcome to the forum. That's why my phone has fingerprint lock and my laptop has an 8 character password, not that I'm worried about my SO, she knows, just in general.

Sounds like you found the right girl!! I hope you guys keep the communication open and take it slow. My wife is very receptive to everything I open up to her about, but communication is key! So glad you had a positive outcome!!

Lucky for you it all turned out right.

At least you know where you stand now.