Quick update - night wear
My wife and I share our bed. I asked her if I might sleep (not sex) in her satin night dress. She said "no". I asked if that was because she didn't want to sleep with me in female attire and she replied "no, it's not that, it's just that nightdress is fragile".
So that's a positive: I can get my own nightdress and at least try sleeping with her in it. She might react against the reality (and that'd be fine, I'd respect her feelings and sadly stop) but at least I have the green light to try! I'd stop of my own accord if I detected her being turned off by it.
I've also been "socially prescribed" an LGBT+ charity regarding gender questions. I think I'm a man who likes crossdressing, but early on (two months ago!) it all made me question if I'm gender fluid. Probably not having read so much of this forum. There's a long waiting list, but they offer 14 well priced counselling sessions if I get through the initial assessment, so I shall see as it would be excellent to talk at length to someone non judgemental - it was a big relief when I opened up to my GP and the social prescriber.
So, I'm happy!