What is Pink Fog? Really.

Hi, I am looking for some education here. I hear about Pink Fog all the time but confess I don't understand what it means exactly. It is generally described as a pressing urge to dress. I don't relate to that. What comes closest to this in my own experience is thinking about it, fancying crossdressing, but it's never compelling. If I know an opportunity is presenting itself in the short future, and I think about it, it thrills me and I am joyful about it. But if I think about it at other times, I just fancy it like I would fancy scuba diving on a nice spot and play with an octopus (oh, I love those). It's not an urge. It doesn't distress me if I can't make it happen. It doesn't obsess me. It does not hinder my everyday life. I can leave it there and go on with other things without coming back to the prospect every other hour or day.

For those who feel like they go through it from time to time, how would you describe the emotion?
If you can't satisfy the urge, what is your level of distress and how do you remedy?
Also I suppose Pink Fog is only a CD thing? If you start or have completed transitioning it seems to me that it becomes irrelevant to you. Correct me if I'm wrong.

If a SO reads this text she/he is more than welcome to provide an external view point.

Diane,

Wonderful question and I suspect you will get a variety of answers. From my perspective your "pressing urge to dress" captures it well. Not all of us get it and often it involves taking risks or excesses beyond one's normal practice. It may involve significant shopping, perhaps throwing on clothes knowing that someone may be coming home early if you are in a DADT relationship because you haven't dressed in a while and MUST be doing it now. Over the years, 50+ of dressing I have had entered the Pink Fog from time to time. If I had purged for instance in hopes of not dressing again, the urge and actions just take over. I do believe it is a CD thing exclusively.

My 2 cents.

Tiffany

I would call the "pink fog" as being a mood, or feeling that comes upon a CD'er and the urge to dress grows to the point of almost overwhelming the individual. In my own experience the urge grows to the point of obsession, and the only way to get it out of my head was/is to dress up. In my case it is usually a particular article of clothing, once I am wearing that article, or dressing up, a calm, or sense of relief comes over me. It is then actually quite relaxing and peaceful. That's how I tend to see the "pink fog" in my life.

It is more an obsession with all things CDing clothes,make up ,wigs etc.
Where a person thinks of nothing but CDing.Its a pretty common thing when they first start out.
I pretty much live as a female 24/7 so its not something I have to deal with.

I always thought of the pink fog being when you are so obsessed you loose your boundaries. Be it how often you dress, going out in public, or buying things. It can be triggered by either a lock of dressing or by a successful act of dressing. Most common is someone has a successful adventure out or day at home dressed and then ends up going on a buying spree in the days that follow.

From hearing from GGs in my local group in Canada we had . They would complain after they worked out compromises between them the cder would blow right though them and they would use the excuse pink fog and could not stop myself.
My experience was in the very beginning and Sherlyn and I met halfway ( we lived in different countries) she would call off work a few days ( after our weekend together) because she said I just cannot stop . I was like noooooo you better be going to work in a skirt . After she had her freedom and saw it was not going to stop this was not an issue again.

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Originally Posted by Robertacd

I always thought of the pink fog being when you are so obsessed you loose your boundaries.

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Yes, that's what always springs to my mind when people describe pink fog. Becoming so totally focussed on CDing that other important things can become neglected at great personal cost.

Diane,
I would agree with Tiffany , it's different things to different people .

I would relate to the driving force , how bad is your dysphoria and how do you deal with it . I feel I have a balance now , I can do what I want when I choose so the highs and lows are now evened out , now I can comfortably be Teresa and live my life as such .

I guess the point is even without "Pink fog " the need is still there .

It is an obsession as someone said! Often attributed to gender dysphoria! Risky behavior as far as dressing and risky spending on clothes and accessories! It does not have to cause harm but the risk is there! For instance, I just spent about $200 on clothes but they were not necessary! They struck my eye and I had to have them! I could afford them without harm so I went for it! I am generally careful with my spending and am sure the bills can be paid before I purchase! Sometimes it is very hard to hold back! I can dress anytime and always so no problems there! Some have a problem with dressing and the extreme urge to dress as soon as possible! IMHO Lana Mae

I spend so much time engulfed in the PINK FOG!
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

If the pink fog hits you, you'll know it.

Great thread. For me, it?s when I?m doing something, anything....mowing the lawn, reading the newspaper, etc. when, out of nowhere, I get these ?butterflies? feeling in my stomach....it can be slight or intense. Immediately, my mind switches to female clothes and the desire to dress. Usually, nylons are #1 and a bra is #2. Sometimes, it goes away, but sometimes it?s so intense, I almost can?t help myself. Thankfully, I have a very supportive wife who seems to sense when it rolls in and sweetly suggests that I get ?comfortable?....which I generally do. Sometimes, I?m happy with a couple things, but sometimes it progresses. With this sequestering, I dress most every day....sometimes not.

The Pink Fog to me is an overly active obsession with whatever trans issue I am involved in. It sometimes becomes a Pink Flood, and I roll with it until it passes.

When I was a lot younger I would get this uncontrollable itch that had to be scratched. It could not wait. It produced stress. Tension mounted. I could not wait for some free time to come along to be en femme as much as possible. It is now inconceivable to me that I would be able to dress with full makeup, wig and outfit, and, be unable to undo all that within two hours. Insane. Later, as the kids went to school for longer days, and, my wife worked the school day I could leisurely peruse my needs. The ultimate came when my wife would visit our youngest child out of state for seven to ten days. I had 24/7 time days and days. I found one of the prime ingredients for the pink fog was the absence of adequate time to scratch that itch. Now, if I cannot get a full day of femme time it does not bother me. Must be a change of hormones.

hello Diane,
occasionally, usually after not dressing for a while, I have the either the overwhelming urge to dress or go shopping. Nothing else matters and all common sense disappears. I have to do it regardless of the risks. I cannot control it.
I assume that this feeling is what people call the "pink fog".
luv J

For me, pink fog is an overwhelming desire to do irrational and risky things when dressed.

For example, going out in my town during the day, even if only for a trip to the market or gas station. It's one thing for acquaintances not to recognize you out and about. It's a whole different story if they see you entering or exiting your familiar car. That's just one example of what pink fog does to me.

I understand the idea of an obsession or an immediate need to crossdress or shop or something.

But to me it's more like alcohol. It makes me braver and more susceptible to influence. More willing to take chances or less aware of the risk I might be taking in say, getting dressed in the house, and hoping my wife won't come home and catch me.

The best example I can think of happened just today. I haven't worn makeup in several years, but today I stopped by the pharmacy down from my apartment to pick up a few things, shaving cream, deodorant, etc. To get to the shaving aisle, I had to go through the cosmetics section, There was a half off coupon hanging by the Revlon lipstick, so in a moment of weakness, I chose a lovely shade of pink and dropped it in my basket. Not something I would rationally do, but I did it anyway.

Small example but for me it illustrates the concept of the pink fog.

By the way, it is a lovely shade of pink and I may be contacting my Mary K consultant if the lock down doesn't end soon...

A strong want to do something girlie not that .much different than my strong wants to have a rye at times

I agree with most definitions here, however, the pink fog seems most pronounced when shopping for ladies wear or when shopping for other things turns into ladies wear shopping. It's when you buy something that you know you don't need or cant afford but you purchase it anyway.

I think Tiffany might have defined it pretty completely. It is an obsessive behavior that, sometimes seems to be triggered by a dysphoria episode. Dysphoria technically is a strong discomfort with a situation or a circumstance. It is a reaction to something that you are not comfortable with or, put another way, is outside your comfort zone. Gender dysphoria, simply put, is a discomfort with your native gender identity (the one that meets social expectations) and seeking a comfort with an alternative gender identity that fits who you are better. There are all kinds of sub-dysphoria associated with gender dysphoria such as body dysphoria, expression dysphoria and a pile of others. The dysphoria is relaxed by moving in the direction of greater self comfort in expression or behavior.

Eight years ago I was almost constantly dysphoric and it drove me and everybody else a little crazy. Now I rarely experience any kind of dysphoria because, after 70+ years, I finally figured out who I am and why I am that way. So, now I am almost always comfortable who I am, no matter what that is or how it is expressed. I did that by abandoning the gender binary concept and embracing the gender mosaic or gender spectrum concept that allows complete freedom in expression and avoids nearly all stereotyping. Very free now.

For me I think of the pink fog as an overwhelming feeling that transcends anything sexual or the actual dressing. My pink fog is shaving my body from head to toe. My pink fog is taking meticulous care of and my nails clear costing fingernails and using colors on my toenails. My pink fog is standing naked in front of the mirror imagining myself with a womanly figure. My pink fog is wearing panties and seeing a gender therapist and opening up about my feelings.

My pink fog is not an overwhelming desire to go out dressed in public. My pink fog is not dancing because I don't dance and it's not going to clubs because I don't drink. My pink fog is trying to suppress it so that I don't ruin a fifty year marriage but finding the denial harder to deal with.

My pink fog, desires, obsessions or whatever are the only instability about me in an otherwise controlled and quiet, modest life. My pink fog is not about comparing myself to others but it's about dealing with myself through counseling and the help I find on this forum. I might never find all the answers and might never even know all the questions but I will keep searching for contentment while trying to balance the fog with everyday life.

I think it is the very strong desire to dress at least to some degree. We really have no choice, we were born this way.

I don't really know what it is nor have I ever heard of it before I joined this site yesterday but whatever it is I think I have it lol since joining yesterday I have bought make up, a wig, 2 dresses, 2 skirts, new femme underwear and shaved my WHOLE body, I have never been this excited about dressing and my future life dressing since joining this site so I guess that is the pink fog taking over lol

I can only speak foe myself but I suppressed my desire to dress for too long. Now when the Pink Fog hits it feels overwhelming. Some of you have discussed the feelings of wanting to experience high risk behaviours. I never thought I need to go out fully dress but now I cant imagine Not going out as a woman. The desire to be seem as a woman even though Im not passable, is too powerful to resist. Its scary but going out fully dressing is not a choice

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I can only speak foe myself but I suppressed my desire to dress for too long. Now when the Pink Fog hits it feels overwhelming. Some of you have discussed the feelings of wanting to experience high risk behaviours. I never thought I need to go out fully dress but now I cant imagine Not going out as a woman. The desire to be seem as a woman even though Im not passable, is too powerful to resist. Its scary but going out fully dressing is not a choice