a private thought by a trans female

i have sometimes had a moment where i have wondered what .Am i ever going to to find the love that i know i need inside as a woman or am i dreaming?Idare say there many people in the same position as i am a crossdresser who woud haVE GONE to the stage of final srsg if they coud have either afforded it or been allowed to by their sos.which brings me to the point am i going to go through the rest of my life not being able to know what it woud be like to be loved as a woman shoud be .?Or is it better never to have known that kind of love or live my present life with a woman who accepts me as i am.Some times it can be heartbreaking to think what life coud have been like if i coud have been born female. davinaxx:daydreaming::battingeyelashes:

Sometimes you can get yourself wrapped up in "what if" scenarios; which can be somewhat negative. I had some of those thoughts years ago. I finally realized that life is what you make of it and my wife gave me enough latitude to be me, so I'm able to enjoy just being me.

I'm not a philosopher and have never taken an philosophy class but I would like to put my two cents in on this and see what you all think. First off, I'm not an unborn female. I was born male and had a fetish for women's underwear. I moved on to CDing and lost the fetish portion of my attraction to ladies attire. That just means I don't do my business with lingerie any more (for many years). That said, I do get a sexual charge from wearing women's clothes so there is still something going on there. So that's my story and I think it is fair that you be able to consider my response with some perspective.

I believe CDing is something we chose to do. I chose it. I'm working diligently toward my first day out en femme. I believe that someone who is gay saying he or she was born that way. If you are a someone that wants to show her feminine side (like me) you (like me) probably made that decision. I don't believe I'd be happy internally because I was dietician/engineer/rapper.

I am a girl as are you. Find what makes you happy and do it to the max.

XOXO,
Tanga

Many times I get into that same train of thought, but I realize that if I had been born a female maybe I would have enjoyed life more, but maybe I could have been born in some pauper country where women are abused, raped, etc.
I have a good life and have wish for no other life. I am thankful for what I have and crossdressing is part of the whole package, I did not choose it but Is part of the package.
Try and be happy with all your gifts including the option to cross the gender divider regarding clothes!

Not too much help here! I have gone my whole life wanting to be female! I'm now sure I'll die still wanting! Hugs!