Can Gals look past the Babydoll Nightie to see how good my strong Arms & Legs Look

When I am wearing one of my babydoll nighties I feel girly and cute but also notice how good my muscular arms and thighs look ! Since I am in the closet it also shows off parts of my hairy chest and hairy legs !

Can and do most women eventually look past all the ruffles, lace and bows and see the muscular guy that is their man ?

It would be nice to be able to come in the bedroom swishing about in a Babydoll and have your SO amused by your playfulness, but also turned on ?

Are maybe women starting to change their views on men in frilly lingerie ?

Any experience with this or thoughts ?

The visual does not come across well. I think women are use to visualizing a nightie on a body that is not muscular or hairy. Obviously that covers a lot of size ranges as nighties do run into the larger sizes. I don't think many women would view a hairy muscular man as cute. I may be wrong when it comes to a unique relationship. There may be some benefits for the women, if it turns on her man. In the early years of our marriage, after my wife found me wearing one of her nighties one night, we dabbled in nighties and hosiery for me. At the time I was six foot + and 175 pounds. Body was not muscular in the sense of bulging over developed muscles, but firm military grade muscles. My genetic profile blessed me with no hair follicles on my thighs and calves, and, I had no chest hair until sometime into my late 50's. My wife always said the lack of body hair, including underarms, was wasted on a guy. My wife never made any comments or laughed when I did have on a nightie. I think the visual was more like a long legged blond with a short hair style than a hairy Neanderthal. I never presented myself as "girlie or swishing." I told my wife that I loved the feel of the nylon fabric on my body which was the truth and motivation for wearing the nightie. I still have and wear one of the nighties we bought for me; a pink midi length peignoir. Several years ago my wife tossed to me the white midi length peignoir she found me wearing one night. Both still fit me, and, I do wear them to sleep in, along with the other three dozen I have in my wardrobe.

Nobody can speak for all women, of course, but if there is one immutable truth, is that generally speaking, heterosexual women prefer their men to be masculine to a degree that does not include an interest in wearing frilly things. Sad, but true.

Individual cases will naturally vary, but that really comes down to the individual.

Can't comment on a woman seeing me in lingerie since I have a boyfriend, but I have a fairly feminine figure so I look plenty girly in beautiful lingerie, and he loves seeing me in it!

All I know is my wife much prefers me hairless! She also likes me in a skirt for easy access, she likes to grab my butt when I'm just wearing a thong. Maybe she just likes me. :)

I am all for inclusion in the CD world but one person once mentioned when it came to complaining that genetic women should be more understanding of us they also mentioned the other side. That statement asked: if you expect your woman to accept your CD'ing consider the flip side. You start noticing your woman not shaving at all anymore, never wearing feminine things or acting like a woman anymore and being more masculine. And then possibly hitting the gym and bulking up. I got the point. I don't like my women bulked up or masculine or hairy. Seeing past my own pink-fog I now I get their point!

Sorry to burst your bubble but there are definitely very very few women who would find the sight of a hairy man prancing about in silky nighties anything vaguely approaching turned on, in fact, very likely the absolute opposite. I'd akin it to farting loudly whilst approaching the bed, belching and scratching your arse followed by shouting 'how about it love'.

First of all, it is Independence Day. Happy 4th of July. Be independent. Put on a dress and go for a walk.

In some ways it seems to me that women are really hoping men will be more sensitive and show a bit more of the feminine traits, especially since women lately have been taking such a beating in some ways in our society in general. But that is at the really big scale and I think attitudes may be a bit different at the smaller, more personal scale. At that level the statistics show that claims of being LGBTQ in some way have soared in the group of about 35 and under. Most aren't but their perception is more open and accepting and that is a big plus. And that applies to not only men but women as well. The younger folks are quite different from the old people like me. In the over 60 or 65 group the the rate of those who make the same claims is quite small. And that could produce a social tension between generations.

So, I suspect, that women in the less than 35 group could be as you describe and more appreciative of hairless males and frills around the house as being fun and a push back against the older generation and their reluctance to go down that road. The question is whether those in the younger groups will continue that into their older age or will it all flounder as happened with the Hippie styles of the late 60's and into the 70's before it all just pretty much faded away. Maybe that was good, maybe not. The point is whether such changes have enough power to persist into older generations so society as a whole may change in a genuine way.

As for my wife she has only complained about the hair on my back which has mostly gone away now that I am in the my late 70's. I wear a lot of solid feminine colors and she "allows" me to do that and even Hawaiian designs of large flowers and leaves so long as it is not too gaudy. In bed I wear men's briefs or panties. Frills? NO! Which produces the same sense of deprivation that is customary in DADT.

That, by the way, is one of the biggest causes of depression in our group. Years ago a well known gender therapist who is fully MTF referred to this as Gender Expression Deprivation Disorder. It never made it into the official DSM 5 but it was well considered because it recognized that CD and TG does not come from depression but rather the deprivation of expression does produce much of the high rate of depression in CD and TG folks. Severe deprivation of that which is fundamental to a person almost always creates depression of a particular kind. Antidepressants will not help that kind of depression. For a vast number of us putting on a dress is not a turn on but produces a high degree of comfort and relaxation and a unique kind of euphoria. And why not? A dress on the outside connects what is inside with the rest of the Universe. It does not necessarily say female but it does say feminine - more gentle, kind, empathic,compassionate, loving, yadda, yadda, yadda.

The gender binary and its expectations as to what is proper expression for males and females continues to restrict the freedom of people to be who they are in an open way. As a result there are a great many people who are still living in closets. Intolerance keeps us there. People form a natural mosaic along the gender dimension and the confinement in the ability of many to express themselves freely is creating a great deal of a strange kind of depression that therapists and psychiatrists can't really fix with a pill. It is fixed with unconditional love that seeks an acceptance of individuality within a mutually agreeable appreciation of each person by and through each person.

As I said before. It is Independence Day. For those who wish to be independent from the gender binary today is your day.

I wear panties 24/7/365, so I wear panties to bed. My wife allows me to wear feminine pajama bottoms with floral patterns or in pastel colors, but nothing on top. She would never allow me to wear a babydoll, nightgown, or nightie with Her. She is aware that I have a couple and She knows that I wear them to bed when She is out of town. I live within Her boundaries. Works best for both of us. Nancy

My wife is encouraging and has laid out nightgowns on the bed for me to wear at night. That being said, I don't think she finds it sexy. She just knows that I like it. The only clothes she finds sexy on me is a tuxedo or a leather thong.

Well Darn ! I was hoping to hear more encouraging things !

When ever a girlfriend put on my boxers or sports jerseys I found it fun and sexy

Maybe some of the GG ladies can explain this better to me as to why it is different

Ahhh, no!

Gretchen's comment about Gender Expression Deprivation Disorder makes a lot of sense. I've mention many times on this forum in my professional career I never wore the "traditional" white shirt with power red tie. To me, seeing all those senators lined up at the U S Capitol wearing the same clothes seems like a clown car. I always expressed myself with a full range on solid colors; pastels to dark hues in the fall worn with expressive ties. My selection of dresses always goes to colors and patterns. With retrospect over the years it makes total sense because, even as a youth I was drawn to colors. I enjoy growing flowers as I enjoy their colors and different shapes.

My collection of nightgowns (30+) reflect the love of colors and I wouldn't characterize them as frilly. The blow back comes from the societal norm that men are not suppose to wear such garments. I would not classify how I feel as sexy, but comforting and soothing.

Heck my wife and I have tried most things over many years of our partnership. Personally we found Jane dressed in frilly nightdresses to bed did little for our relationship, but we tried most things. Hope it works out for you. Every one and every partnership is unique. Makes life what it is, enjoy.

I don't understand your question:

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Maybe some of the GG ladies can explain this better to me as to why it is different

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Why what is different?

If your question is: Are women changing their views on men in frilly lingerie? Then there are probably as many answers as there are women.

What does your wife think of you in frilly lingerie? Does she enjoy your playfulness? Or get "turned on" as you ask? She should be the only one that matters to you what she thinks.

I think there are very few women who would find that look attractive.

The only thing that matters is your wife/SO/spouse/partner/girlfriend. What does she think?

Nothing else and what anyone else thinks matters.

If you foster solid relationships, than you will get more latitude within those relationships.

If not, it is irrelevant what you wear or look like.

If you notice, OP, most dressers are into lingerie . Yours happens to be vintage baby dolls..
I am the type uninterested in lingerie on my male lover ...and none of mine are hyper masculine anyway..lingerie does nothing for me. I need that time to be totally natural .

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Originally Posted by Robbiegirl

When I am wearing one of my babydoll nighties I feel girly and cute but also notice how good my muscular arms and thighs look ! Since I am in the closet it also shows off parts of my hairy chest and hairy legs !

Can and do most women eventually look past all the ruffles, lace and bows and see the muscular guy that is their man ?

It would be nice to be able to come in the bedroom swishing about in a Babydoll and have your SO amused by your playfulness, but also turned on ?

Are maybe women starting to change their views on men in frilly lingerie ?

Any experience with this or thoughts ?

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As a gg who has lurked for years, trying to understand, and in the process, gaining a new respect/empathy for so many of you who struggle, or embrace this, I will say a resounding, "no". And I don't know why it is sexy/flirty for a female to dress in a man's shirt, but in the movies,, that usually implies that female spent the night and just threw on his shirt before she showered and then put on her own clothing. Their is nothing cute about a muscular man in a baby doll nightie. I'm sure a loving wife could adapt to the idea that this is a fantasy/fetish of yours, and she could role play as needed, if it turns you on, and that could be a plus for you both.

Outside of a kilt, I doubt many women would find a man in a skirt an attractive thing.

Great thread to start the day thinking. Gretchen?s insight about Gender Expression Deprivation Dysphoria rings true with me, and it?s reassuring to have a label applied to something I?ve experienced.

And it?s cool several GG have chimed in, it would be helpful to hear from them more often.

And I love sleeping and waking up in a nightgown, and also like the way my arms and shoulders look defined and masculine. But can?t imagine the cognitive dissonance would be appealing to most anyone female.

Nope. Never in your wildest dreams. I agree with Wildheart's comments. There is a certain masculine, almost solder/warrior-like quality that a kilt has that some women are attracted to and that
some men can pull off rather nicely. But a frilly pink nightie? that ain't happening. Save that for your alone fantasies.

On a funny note, usually the first question women will ask of a male kilt wearer is, "Hey, what are you wearing underneath that?" Now imagine if men asked women that straight off. It wont go well.
Besides, a true kilt wearing scotsman knows the appropriate answer to what's underneath :)

Lastly for fun, that reminds me of an old joke:

After a late night of heavy drinking, a Scotsman wearing a kilt falls asleep under a tree. The next morning, two girls on their way to school encounter the sleeping Scotsman.
One of the girls pulls a shiny blue ribbon from her hair and carefully ties a pretty bow around the Scotsman's parts. They giggle and scurry away.
Later the Scotsman wakes up. He slowly notices something feels strange. He looks under his kilt and finds the blue ribbon.
"Ah don't know where ya been laddie, but ya won Furst Prize!"

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Well a picture tells a thousand words ! I may try another with more light. Maybe if you see more of the hair on my chest and legs you can judge better what a woman might focus in on and not so much the nightie !

I don't think there's much room for negotiation. Regardless of your intentions, that look just screams "queer", and I mean that in a good way.

Sorry you're not getting the answers you hoped for, but they were honest. Double down all you want, but you'll just be fooling yourself.

Chest and legs look much better smooth and soft

Sorry, Robbie! I don't think many of us "dress up for our girlfriends", or wives! :eek:

I dress for me! And, if I see man: arms, hair, or ANYTHING male in my mirror? I'm DONE dressing for the moment!:doh: