What would you have said ?

I'm trying to make Sunday my treat day, walking the dog dressed ! I showered and shaved most parts, the wife goes off to cover a weekend shift so I dab some of her deodorant on, get fully dressed, no makeup or wig ! I usually slip a lightweight sleeveless jacket of my wife's on , I'd made some new forms and they were working well so when I zipped up the jacket did they feel and look good ! I cover over with my lightweight waterproof jacket and over trousers, tucking the skirt inside.
Usually I can position my arms so the bust shape isn't too obvious when I walk but this morning it wasn't working ! Luckily I reached the open fields without incident and removed my outer jacket, did it feel good ! Returning I knew I'd have to reluctantly cover up again but the bust just felt bigger ! So what if I met someone from the village ? What would I say if a comment was passed about my different shape ? Would I brave it out and say I'm trying to get use to them or try and bluff it by saying my new mobile phone and glasses case just got bigger !

What would you say ?

Hi Teresa,

Interesting conundrum. I guess it would depend on how noticeable they are and what the other person says. If the person says nothing, I would assume they noticed but chose not to say a word or perhaps they did not notice . . . so I would not offer up any commentary but would prepare myself for potential fall out should the person be a chatty bat of sorts. If they noticed I guess I would have to bite the bullet as any other explanation would seem not probable since they were obviously breast forms.

Hugs

Isha

It seems like you are working toward revealing yourself to the world at large. I think it's great - and you are very brave for doing so. The law of averages means that eventually you will run into someone you know if you go out often enough. Even if you don't see anyone close by it doesn't mean you haven't been spotted.

I would just act as if it is an open secret. If I get questioned about my appearance I try to answer simply and honestly. If someone asked me why I was wearing a skirt or had on makeup I'd try to act as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Something along the lines of "...because I feel like it today." If you are out in the world and get approached in a friendly way by someone you know, it's a pretty good indicator that they will be ok with you as you are.

Easier said than done, right? I've run into neighbors as Lucy, but with the hair and shades etc. it's possible they didn't know it was me. I just walked on by. Where I live we generally don't talk to strangers - and I can be really strange!

The question is whether you are prepared to own it if you get called out while you are on one of these little dalliances. If so, then carry on with what you are doing and have fun. If not, then you may want to rethink this Sunday routine.

I'll put this into a bit of context. I go out but I'm not "out". I won't leave my front door presenting as female in the daylight. I'll either put her together on the road or sometimes leave the house out of my garage. I wouldn't dream of walking my dog with bra & forms. I guess this holds zero allure for me aside from the practical privacy that I am trying to maintain. I have a "no fly zone" around my home & office that I will occasionally breach. But regardless of whether I encounter someone I know in this zone or somewhere else, I am at a place in my life where I am at least prepared to own it. My world will not explode if I am "caught". I can deal with it mentally which is something I could not say nearly 10 years ago.

Are you in that place?

The comment would have to come from someone that is fairly close to you. No acquaintance is going to say hey you've been putting on some weight or your body is changing shape.
Its going to either be a smart ass buddy of yours who will say what the F is up with you. Everybody else will just whisper behind your back. To answer your question as to what would I say and the answer is I don't know because when I go out its all or nothing so I would be caught in full blown female mode. I guess I would say what do you want to do now still be my friend or not?

Sara,
I guess I am !
I've got to age where if I don't do it now I never will ! So I guess as I know most of the people in the village they'll probably think I've lost my marbles !!

Sic the dog on them, then take off your trousers and show your skirt and prove you've lost your mind.

I wouldn't have a clue what to say if I were "caught", Teresa. And worse, have no desire to have to explain it over and over to everyone who knows me.:doh:

For that and many other reasons I never go out dressed where I mite be recognized!:daydreaming:

I'm much like Sara in having a "no-fly" zone near my home. It does break down in the back yard a little bit, but the horses on one side still don't talk to me and I've never really met the folks on the other side of the back privacy fence, so it's hard to think of when I'd face the same situation. But it could happen as I get more and more comfortable and willing to reduce the area of no contact.

So what would I say? If they engaged in conversation about the dog or the weather or something similar I'd chat about those things and watch their eyes to guage their awareness of my newly observed shape. I'm similar to you in getting tired of hiding this side of me, so I might ask what they think of my attempt to create a feminine shape. Since it would have been my choices that put me in this situation it would be unreasonable to turn it over to the rumor mill. This would be time to take control over the narrative rather than let them come up with some kind of story that could be much worse than reality.

Or I could take Allisa's approach and start dancing in the mud and singing old songs while trying to make my eyes cross. Who knows?

I'd point wildly at the sky and shout "Great Crested Grebe! Can't stop, forgot my camera!" then run like hell.

Option 2, don't put yourself in a situation like this???....

Given the likelihood of being seen by someone you know and the obvious shape, a different question Teresa. What do you want to be the outcome?

I am more of a all or nothing kinda girl. I have been seen at least twice by people that know me. Both times I was driving my truck that I had at the time, it had my name on the side so hard to miss. The first person never said anything and I have talked with him many times sense. The other asked who was the lady driving my truck, I said she was doing some work for me. I'm to the point now that I would just say it was me.

Since I wear a size 38D bra and silicone forms to fill it, it's quite obvious even under layers of clothing. If I were to be questioned about my "new" look I would make a joke of it and tell the questioner, "I'm testing a new flotation device for shallow water swimmers".

Teresa
Once I had to get something out of my car on the street and thought I could dash out, while in a mid-calf skirt and t-shirt, and not be noticed. No such luck! My neighbor's wife saw me and all I could do was boldly go up to her and make some humorous chat about how I liked the comfort of wearing skirts and that I hiked the local mountains in a skirt too. She laughed and just seemed to think me crazy, which is OK. That seemed preferable to running back into my house like I'd done something wrong. We're still friends and chat occasionally. I really care less and less what people think, but I am careful where I dress up.

I once drove my car with breast forms and was petrified I'd have an accident or get stopped by the police. But it was a powerfully erotic feeling back then. Maybe the emotional charge of almost being caught is what's behind your desire to walk dressed. Whatever the case, you have to consider the ramifications.
Gypsy

What does your wife think you should say, if someone ask you why you suddenly have developed breasts?
I suppose most of the people in the village knows her too.

I don't think what you are doing is a good idea. Especially with the difficulties you have been having with your wife and family.

You are playing with fire Teresa, and you are risking it all.

My $0.02

Hi Teresa,
I think that once you can really accept yourself for who you are and how you want to dress then you more likely to pull off being out in public without other people getting upset about it. People can sense if we are not comfortable in our own skin (and clothes) and then they become uncomfortable in turn. I have come to believe that the key to acceptance by others is to first accept ourselves. Sounds trite, I know, but it is based on my own experience as I am becoming more comfortable getting out in public and seeing the reaction of folks I interact with. Chances are that if you don't show anxiety about being seen then the people you meet on your walks will not say a word about your extra charms.
Hugs,
Steph

It seems to me that you almost want to get caught. The question is, what happens when the word gets back to your wife? At my age, I'm almost to the point where I don't care for myself but I still have my wife and her feelings to think about. She would be pretty embarrassed for friends and neighbors to find out that she is married to a crossdresser.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Teresa

Sara,
they'll probably think I've lost my marbles

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Well, there's that.

It occurs to me that you wear forms when outwardly presenting as a male because you need an outlet. You've reached the point where being in the closet is not enough and you now need to go out in public. I would say that most CDers get to that point if they feel they can get away with it.

So you are faced with a quandary: How to go about this, while not outing yourself to people who will think you've lost your marbles. So you cover up with loose clothing and you come up with what you think might be plausible reasons for bulges under your jacket, all the while feeling nervous about "getting caught" on the way to and from the field with your dog.

Wouldn't it be easier to dress full-on and just drive to a larger town where you might be more anomymous? This way you'd get it out of your system on a regular basis, without risking the possible fallout with your wife and family, should there begin gossip in your village that you enjoy walking around with a pair of manufactured breasts.

Believe me, once you get to the point where you feel you can drive wherever and whenever you want while dressed, you will lose the desire to wear forms and cover them up just to walk your dog in your village. I don't know how close your immediate neighbors are and how easy it would be to get from your door to your car, but you could always wear a loose jacket over ladies' slacks, with dark glasses. If you wear a wig, you could pull over somewhere put it on quickly after you've left your village.

I would say "cancer therapy". Immediately the other person would feel so low for making a judgment of other people. :)

Reine,
I have driven dressed to other towns, but never managed to take a walk ! The point is my dressing is now limited to Sundays until 4.00pm, so I find dressing the way I do and walking the dog is very enjoyable, yes I have been caught out by a passing commuter train, a horse rider and some rail line workers but I've dealt with that but on those occasions I wasn't wearing forms !
Frustratingly my son for the fourth week running has called to see me , so this week I asked my wife if something was going on, was my son doing this intentionally in an attempt to stop my dressing habit ?

I am practicing to walk like a woman for an upcoming mannequin parade I am in.

That was my reply when caught many years ago.

Yes they bought it and they also attended the mannequin parade six months later.