Going out of the front door.

I have read several threads where going out maybe for the first time and also subsequent times
has been traumatic.

But I would love to see some of your stories, funny and the serious ones about going out for the first time.
For instance, how long or how stressful was it before you took that first step across to the outside world, how many times did you check outside the house before you left it?

For me when I first ventured out of the front door I must have checked the windows hundreds of times, opened and closed the front door hundreds of times before stepping out. Even once outside it seemed that ALL the neighbors came out at the same time which left me a shivering wreck.

Also, I remember once after checking hundreds of times if anyone was about. I went out and I managed to get to the car parked on my drive, and as I got into the car in a rush I hit my head on the opening into the car and my hair came adrift:doh: It was exactly at this point the postman who I failed to see when checking if the coast was clear came and gave me my post. How embarrassing :o

Even though most of us take our dressing seriously I do laugh at these things now and it does make me smile when I do hear of other stories.

But if I could turn the clock back, I would do it all again it has and is a great life being gender fluid. Trust Me! :battingeyelashes:

Gail xxxxxxx

Nothing really funny for me, just the peeking out the window dozens of times, "knowing" that EVERYONE was intently watching me because they had nothing more pressing or important going on in their lives, realizing just before I went in to a store that although I must have checked countless times before leaving the house, I had corset laces hanging out in back...

Do you ever look out your front windows when you're not getting ready to go out dressed? Look for the mailman/woman? UPS? To check the weather? To check on a noise you heard?

You never know which of your neighbors might be doing the same when you try sneaking out the door dressed as a woman. Just because you don't see them walking down the street doesn't mean they are not looking. And worse, when you come back home, how do you know they won't be out getting their mail, mowing the grass or just standing there talking to other neighbors? You can't just drive on by and come back later, especially if you drive a distinctive vehicle or live on a dead end street.

Leaving and returning to your house dressed is a pretty risky adventure if you want to remain "in the closet". You might pull it off if you keep the car in the garage, have an automatic opener and heavily tinted windows on the car.

Changing at a friends house or a motel room works best. Second best is what I do - Leave underdressed and finish dressing in the car. Undress in the car before returning home. It's a royal PITA but what else can you do?

Well it didn't happen when I walked out the front door, but it was "funny" (now that I look back on it) and it did happen on my very first trip out dressed as Karen. A portion of that trip included visiting a wig boutique that had relocated to a new location. After parking my car, I inadvertently walked into the men's barber shop located next door to the wig boutique. Not only did I walk in, I proceeded to ask the barber where Marlene (owner of the wig boutique) was. He had no idea who I was talking about as he hadn't met Marlene yet. The confused look on his face during our conversation was priceless. :laughing: The way I "owned" my situation also surprised the heck out of me. :doh::heehee:


Karen

I am still in the closet but got "bold" one day!! Had on knee highs and flats and went out to get the mail!! Looked around the neighborhood fifty times on the way out and back and saw no one!!! So silly only people who would be home would not have seen shoes anyway!! LOL Hugs Lana Mae

I know I posted it a number of years ago. My first time was when I was out of town on business. I was all dressed in the hotel trying to get up the nerve to open the door. checked the peep hole a few times to see if the hall was empty. Then it happened. The fire alarm goes off. I was at the end of the hall by the stairs. Grabbed my purse and car keys, out the door and down the stairs to the car and off into the world I went. I really got bold for the first time. I went to Target, and ordered pickup from Applebees. The server was a little confused when she brought out the order. But who cares. I guess it took a push, but once I was out I had a wonderful time.

Gail,
The problem I have is when going out at night I've rigged lights either side of my porch and two either side of my garage door and one in an ornamental lamp post , all controlled by one PIR, so when anyone enters the drive or steps out the front door it's like being on stage . So it's a mad dash to the car and try not to do what you did and catch your head as you dive into the car, it's easier said than done when wearing 4" heels and a tight skirt or dress , the same applies when I arrive home just after midnight. I still enjoy it , what if someone does see me , I look all woman from a distance the problem is my car is very recognisable .

I just usually walk right out but one time was funny. My cat got out and I went to get her without even thinking got both feet on the lawnmower and fell right on my face. The neighbor came over to help me up and asked if. I was alright. In. My best voice I said yes. Then explained.about my cat. Anyway there I was inmy lbd in my stocking feet. My 4" heels sunk in the ground.funny now but it wasn't at the time.

I don't even remember the first time but, I vividly remember the time I ever so slowly and carefully and quietly and perfectly I closed the front door only to have a twenty pound ceramic come loose and crash into my head. Fully dressed, blood dripping down my face and on the verge of passing out I made my way to the shower. Told Wife the next day, "Couldn't sleep, thought I heard a noise outside, found the crashed artwork and took a shower after I cleaned it up."

Here's the last time I went out the front door, this morning. I've gotten much better at it!

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Ouch!! Glad you have gotten better at it!!! Hugs Lana Mae

My first time out in a crowd was in Vegas, I had my daughter with me and were staying at the Excalibur Casino, even though my daughter knows about my crossdressing she has never seen me with wig and makeup, so I had to wait till she fell asleep before I good get ready, it was about 10pm by the time I got out of my room, I walked the strip for about an hour, bought a pair of ear rings from Walgreens then went back to my room showered and went to bed. It will a thrill to do it, but nothing happened except being called mam, that was a confidence builder.

I'm all for getting underdressed when leaving the house and changing/doing makeup in the car. Finding a good spot to park is the challenge. I can do some of this at stoplights or in traffic jams.

Here's a story I wrote about my first make-over

First Make Over at Lord and Taylor
I reached another milestone in my transgendered journey this week. Last September I approached the cosmetics counter at Lord and Taylor trembling inside asking for a foundation to provide good coverage. The first woman I spoke with directed me to the NARS counter. At this point I thought “oh no they are freaking out”, but the young woman I met Kasey, was polite and helpful. Over the next few months I would come back to build my needed stock of make-up. Each time she would teach me how to use the cosmetics and also encourage me. We had some in depth conversations about transgendered people and the world. During this time she would extend the repeated offer of a make-over. Now back 10 months ago I never would have dreamed of going out in public and getting a make-over. But over the last year I started to get my proverbial TG wings and have stated going out regularly.
So yesterday was the day, I showed up at Kasey’s counter where she greeted me with a smile. It was surreal to be sitting there, in the make-up chair, having all my life walked by watching with envy as women were getting make over’s. The make-over took about an hour. Kasey gave me some fantastic tips, each step of the way. I have had make over’s before but they were always done by TG artists, the look was ultra glamorous. I have always wanted to find a professional look, suitable for a transgendered woman like my self. Kasey did it; I loved the sophisticated but subtle look she gave me. I took a walk around the mall and felt like a princess. You can see the picture on my Flickr page.
After the make-over I headed out to the Paula Young wig’s factory store.
The women there were friendly and helpful, after awhile I was trying on dozens of wigs off the showroom shelf and finally wound up buying three. We has some great conversations, the women were asking me all about, why, how long, and where about my dressing. They gave a complements on my outfit. It was great to talk openly about so many things I have held inside for so long. There was another woman there, a customer, who was helping me pick out wigs and helped me style them. We sat and had some deep conversations about her life, her gay brother and my transgenderism. She kind rattle me when she told me that I make a great women, and she hoped someday I would seek re-assignment, since it was obvious that I was really a women. I have always considered my self a cross-dresser and her saying this kind of messed with my mind. When I was leaving I told the SA’s, “I never thought I say this but I can’t wait to get out of these heel and pantyhose” They laughed hysterically and said “Now you sound like a woman!”


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The first time I stepped out the door en femme was for me, really funny. My wife and I were going out to a nightclub, and had about a fifty yard walk to the car. Now I know I was looking good - hair, makeup all checked by my dear wife. Just as she was about to open the front door, I said "Look love, can you just peep outside and see if there is anyone there.?"

"Are you a man or a mouse?"

"Squeak" was my reply, and out we went, into the dark night of watchers, police cars vampires and the rest. So we got to the club, and sitting on bar stools sipping our drinks, we engaged in conversation with a very chubby and chuckly gay gentlemen, who asked me "Do you ever go cottaging?" What the hell is that, I thought and then he explained the sensual delights of picking up guys in public toilets for quick sex!

NOT my scene. Quick change of table an off to the ladies to fix my make up, which had liquified and was mostly around my chin. I was SO naive, I could not help laughing, but he was quite a nice chap, and I could not think of a less romantic venue than a public mens toilet! We live, and hopefully learn!

I do think back and think how stupid I was when first going out. The inner drive to venture out really was unbearable. In the beginning my ventures were limited to a late night drive. My wife and I had two small kids. We were DADT. I would use the kids' bathroom to change into my outfit, which was always wig, bra, panty, slip, hosiery, dress and a low heel. Even makeup. I thin back and think, "What if one of the kids got up to go potty?" Surely, he or she would have tried the bathroom door. Once full attired I slipped out the door, leaving the porch light off. A jaunt through the neighborhood, and, maybe getting out of the car for a short walk. Once I venture a good ten miles from my house and even had a police car stop next to me on a light at mid night. "Oh, please do not pull me over!" Before I would get home I would change into male clothes and remove my makeup, if I was wearing any that night. For the life of me thinking back, at least some of those times my wife surely had to get up a go potty herself. I was naive to think she never realized her husband was not in the house. Did she know or suspect I was out cross dressing? What if she was awake when I returned? Or the kids? Darn, I was naive. She never ever said a word. Even on Halloween when I really dressed to the nines and went into stores to buy something.

I think back and think that was really "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." A real stick your head in the sand and ignore hubby's cross dressing.

My story is a tad different. I already knew about girls going to gay bars, being gay, and going to gay bars.
The very first time I got dressed from head to toe I looked in the mirror and said 'Now what'.
"Zelda's, here we come...I'm here, I'm queer, and you can't stop me!'
I really didn't give a hoot if the neighbours, or the mailman saw me. I hobbled out to my car in heels, and headed downtown.
Granted. I'm an extrovert. I'm a musician who lived on stage (a 'look at me thing' if there ever was), and knowing I was gay from a young age, I've managed to thumb my nose at anyone who looked at me sideways.

The downside- Looking back, I realize I looked terrible. Really bad makeup, dressed in black from head to foot, no purse, so I was carrying my man-wallet, and I had not realized hard floors are much harder to walk on than broadloom.

The upside- Nobody cared. They all said I looked great, I had a good time, and no villagers with torches came after me.

That was almost thirty years ago, and I never looked back. I transitioned a few years ago, but those were good times as well.

I look back at my first attempts to wander outside and I'm kind of embarrassed. I think I attracted more attention by acting like a paranoid neurotic than I could ever garner by how I was dressed. I would try to maintain some ridiculous 50 foot personal bubble; crossing the street to avoid people, walking in some strange serpentine pattern through the park. Trying to be seen, but unseen at the same time. If someone came within 10 feet of me without me noticing I'd be startled and turn and veer off in the other direction. :doh:

Eventually, it dawned on me; these people don't know me. Like, literally. I'm in a store with 200 people, not one of them knows my name, or who I really am, or where I live, or any of that. And in the odd chance one person was in that store that did know me in boy mode, they'd be hard pressed to recognize me. Eventually I worked my way up to daring to go into a store... where nothing happened. And at the cash register the clerk asked me a question. Oh My God! A human is talking to me! :eek: I said yes, she handed me my receipt and said thank you, Miss, and started on the next customer. There was no point and scream, body snatcher style.

I've been places out shopping and gone places in boy mode and seen either a C/Der or Transperson who doesn't blend that well, moving about like there was nothing out of the ordinary. And I'll admit, at the risk of sounding like a lurker, I sort of watch to see if anyone would harass them. But the kicker is nobody ever does. We tend to fear the worst (I mean, thats how fear works. Nobody fears minor). But largely it's been my experience that 99.9% of people don't care. One's own fear is the biggest hurdle. You can do it!

One of these days I'll get the nerve to really go out. There's a good community here in town, but I can't tell if I'm passable or it's just the pink fog.

I first ventured out a year or so ago and it was at night. It was very much a pink fog moment! That weekend I had a delivery that contained my ever first wig and some women's glasses (to soften/hide my face slightly). Combined with the clothing I already had, putting on the wig and glasses really transformed me. In my mind it was a "Wow" moment and it was almost like the universe had given me permission to step outside the door.

I managed a 5 minute dash down the street and back - thankfully without seeing anyone but it was so special. Feeling the wind on my legs / around my skirt was amazing even with opaque tights on.

Making plans for a weekend away in London soon (I live in the UK) and plan to do some sightseeing / walk around the parks while dressed. Maybe early morning this time. Really working hard to perfect my look so I can pass as I want it to be amazing. In a way the big city element where lots of people do crazy things and you are anonymous appeals to me more so than dashing around my local town.

That was so long ago seems like but I think I opened the front door looked both ways and walked out to my car got in and drove off.
No fanfare no tranny police or neighbors with pitch forks and torches.