Hi all,
Last week I was in a counselling session and my therapist asked the same question she always asks "So, how are things going". Now some may see this a small talk to develop rapport prior to getting down to things but in essence it is what I like to refer to as "emotional mining". She asks the question, studies my reaction then follows-up. One time I had to think and she responded "Why so long in responding" . . . ah therapy. But I digress.
On this particular day I came right back with "Great!" . . . the ball in now in your court therapy lady. Of course not getting off the hook, she replied "Great . . . how?" . . . serve returned. I replied, "Great because I can be who I want to be. I can go out dressed, not dressed, work knows, people know, my family knows, I don't have to hide who I am" . . . ball spiked over the net :)
She then smiled and said, "So you feel authentic" . . . sun in my eyes, ball missed . . . point and match to therapy lady. Authentic . . . what the &%$#:eek:. I wasn't aware I was some ersatz version of a person and now have suddenly become authentic. So after the session I decided to give this some thought . . . authenticity in human sense comes from existentialist philosophy and means being true to yourself, happy in your choices, and your spirit, regardless of societal pressures. :idontknow: . . . well that helped . . . like I wasn't happy before . . . wait I guess I wasn't. Giving it some reflection, I discovered that now I have made certain choices I am happier, more carefree . . . in essence authentic to the person I need to be given my current circumstances. Subsequently, if this gal was to shuffle off her mortal coil tomorrow she would do so a happy girl :)
Ah . . . Your point Isha :confused: . . . sorry getting there:
I have seen a rash of posts recently about whether to come out to others, TG hierarchy, should you go out dressed, standing up for the cause, etcetera, etcetera. I truly believe, we all tell our stories not to rub it anyone's face but for the most part to share a "feel good moment" on some personal growth level. Does that mean we all have to follow the "Piper out of Hamelin?" No. We can learn from these stories, reflect on them and decided if they would hold true for us or if we even need to go down that road.
The one thing that rings true is . . . "be true to yourself". Or as therapy lady so aptly put . . . be authentic. If you don't need to tell the world about your proclivity and you feel good then stay the course. You don't need to pick-up the sword of injustice, don your "I'm a TG superwoman cape" and fight the good fight to feel good about yourself. If your thing is staying in, dressing up and watching TV and that makes you feel good about yourself then guess what . . . you are being authentic. If you have a desire to dress "en femme" present yourself to world and say I am TG so accept it or not and you feel good about yourself . . . again you are being authentic.
Ah . . . still looking for your point Isha :rolleyes:
My point being that we all make decision based on what works for us. Some will tell their family others won't. Some will dress up and go clubbing others won't. Some will say indoors and others will go out. We may share something in common but we are all different. If you are happy expressing yourself in the way you deem appropriate to your life's circumstance then who cares what others think. If you need to change your authenticity in order to be happy, only you will know when that change is needed and will act on it when required. Don't drink the "purple Kool-Aid because someone tells you it is good for you. Do what you need to do to be happy with who you are . . . AUTHENTIC.
Hugs
Isha