Ours, don't lie and be reasonable with spending. I personally think $320.00 for a winter dress coat is excessive.
Ours, don't lie and be reasonable with spending. I personally think $320.00 for a winter dress coat is excessive.
hello Nikki,
we have never really discussed boundaries - but I dress in private and I am sure my wife would tell me if embarrass her , so her boundaries are probably the limit of my bravery (i.e. don't scare the neighbours or children).
luv J
Dress on the weekends. Occasionally through the week. I'll go to the store or get gas.
Most of my time is spent as a male.
I keep body hair trimmed or shaved.
My wife has been out with me when we were out of town but not local.
Her number one rule is don't get caught by anyone we know.
Andrea
1. Don't let the kids know anything about this. Same with family, although that bridge has been kind of crossed.
2. Don't go out in public, at least anywhere that anyone would recognize me.
3. Don't be TG, as she doesn't want a full time wife.
4. Don't do it all the time. She didn't marry a woman.
4. Don't go crazy spending money on this, or hoarding.
My wife doesn't want to see me dressed. So only dress when she is not around.
She would like my to only go out twice a year, but she is flexible.
Try not to spend too much money on women's clothes (also on anything else)
She will not buy me anything.
She would like my to keep it in check.
We can talk about my dressing, but not all the time, I try to only talk about it when relevant
Overall she is flexible on everything except seeing me dressed. To echo others, She married a man.
Sara
Sara66 do we have the same wife ,but one thing no going out at all my wife has to many relatives on the police force!!!
My late wife set the boundaries that my darling second wife has continued. They are
1. Not in front of the kids, or grandchildren now.
2. Always present acceptable, nothing fetishism, or tarty.
3. Never with her clothes.
Other than that there are no real rules.
Luckily there seem to be no boundaries between me and my girlfriend. We have only been together for a half a year or so but when we startet our relationship, i wasn't really honest with myself about my desire to crossdress. About a month or two ago I started to talk about it with her and she was really open and cool about it. Because this is still so new to me, the fact that I can talk openly about it with her and experiment as I want to, makes things so much easier. And her support has made the struggle within so much easier.
So far there hasn't been put any boundaries on anything. I keep my fingers crossed that it will stay that way.
The funny thing is that she isn't really a woman who uses makeup, plucks eyebrows and stuff like that so she can't really give me any advice on my journey either.
So luckily I can meet likeminded people here 😊
She allows me to dress whenever she is not at home. She never really accepted my dressing, but she understands that it is something that I must do.
As some of you would have seen from my posts we go out together when I’m dressed up prior to which we get ready together. She doesn’t exactly like me shaving my whole body but understands it’s part of the process and as result she even helps me by shaving my back. Our number one rule is that we are both comfortable and if one of us isn’t then we pull back until we both are. Sometimes she won’t come out with me and other time it’s her idea to go out. So far she hasn’t been out with me during the day as that’s currently out of her comfort zone but I can’t wait until we go shopping together.
We call them guidelines....
- No public appearances
- No prancing or flaunting in front of her
- I can wear anything my wife would normally wear (that seriously limits my options)
- Leg shaving is okay
- If my wife doesn't comment either it's acceptable or she didn't notice
I don't normally dress in front of my wife. We don't talk about my dressing so I feel uncomfortable dressing when she's around.
My S.O. likes hairy men, so I cannot shave my body. (that would be an undertaking!) I wear long sleeves and opaque hose, which takes care of it.
I also have to let her know I would like to dress. If Cynthia just makes an appearance, she sighs heavily. She also seems hostile to her, but that just may be the trope we have of me being her husband's mistress.
My restrictions are don't dress fully around my kids or family. They already know I'm a CD lol..... no problem
My wife grew up in a heavily conservative home and it has extended to our marriage. I think fear of what "could be" does more to keep her concerned about dressing than the actual dressing. We are basically DADT but I wish we could do some play in the bedroom but she has such disdain for it I would never feel comfortable with her in the room.
Its been complicated to say the least, very stressful, but I value my wife and love her very much.
When I first told her about my crossdressing (before we were married) she had the typical societal concerns about me being gay, transgendered, or wanting to (more and more) live my life as a woman. I laid out what I was into at the time, and she sort of agreed that "okay, but no more than that" which was:
- Underwear is, by and large, okay.
- Heels are okay.
- Nighties/PJs are okay.
- Strictly private, keep it inside the house. (underdressing is okay as long as its invisible)
I assured her that I do not believe myself to be female, I don't wish to become a female, I don't wish to pretend to be female.
The feeling I sometimes get from her even after 15 years is that my crossdressing is still something she puts up with and fears rather than understands or supports, and were I to cross those original boundaries I wonder if she'd think something along the lines of "Well, now he's wearing a dress. Next it's going to be makeup. Then a wig. Then he's going to insist I call him by a female name, and after that he's getting breast implants and leaving me for a man."
Of course, the flip side of all that - my wife married me, a man, and not one of her girlfriends.
She sets the boundaries. She knows I like to dress, but to the extent she has no idea. She knows I wear panties, has been with me when they were purchased, but won't buy them for me. I have purchased leggings with her and have asked her opinion on panties and leggings and have gotten reasonable feed back (that won't fit because or that should be ok). Beyond that, it's only on me. I shop at thrift stores for clothes and she knows where they are kept; things are not hidden. My girl things budget is my small at best.
I get to go out very late at night, alone, and leave in guy mode, then change to girl mode. One time she said she wanted to go with me right as I was walking out the door, but as quickly as she said it, she changed her mind to just stay home.
I am free to wear anything I want at home... as long as it is not in front of the daughter and the granddaughters who live with us. Working in the yard has to be hybrid enough that it doesn't draw any attention and no large forms. Otherwise the rule for now is don't leave the house dressed. Admittedly that is becoming more and more difficult as I yearn for an outlet for my ever-growing wardrobe. The few times I have gotten out have been so exhilarating it was almost intoxicating!
1. No bra in bed.
2. Don't get a boob job (I went to see a plastic surgeon before we met, to talk about facial feminization and boobs. I almost certainly wouldn't have done it anyway, but EH's objection settled it).
3. Be a boy sometimes, too.
And, most important: respect her preferences. In other words, when she asks me "Can you go in boy mode tonight please?" I will always say No Problem.
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(In case it's not clear: we go out together as 2 girls regularly. She has no problem with it whatsoever as long as it's not in a situation where, for instance, her former in-laws might make an appearance.)Quote:
Originally Posted by TracyT
The only real boundary set was not to let the child see me. and she'll (wife) will only see me if/when she's ready.
Other than that I set my own to be safe as I didn't want to overwhelm her with it all, because its all new to her and she's learning what its all about. She knows I go shopping time to time and have even ordered her things along with mine, she's been ok with it. She's asked if I have any stockings she can she use before, so I think its going well. I only dress when home alone and keep most of my things away in bins out of sight.
The only thing my wife has vetoed entirely is getting my ears pierced. When I commented about the lack of clip on earrings available she started converting them for me. She has made numerous pairs of earrings, necklaces and bracelets for me. I set most of our boundaries because I get insecure about my appearance. We go out dressed and she has pushed me to go further than I sometimes want. She does it to encourage me, not embarrass me.
Mine is along as the kids dont find out with is mine also
Found one yesterday we bought a new home with a pool. I wanted to buy a cute one piece floral bathing suit...she said that's wear I draw the line lol. Doesn't want to see that.
My wife is generally supportive. She does not want the neighbors to see me going out. I respect her concerns and am very careful when I leave the house.
Basically I need to keep it to myself. Most of the time I travel to Chicago and venture out. I call them "Wendy Weekends"...
My wife's main concern is that I'd get hurt, primarily emotionally (I've always been the "emotional girl" in our relationship) if someone insulted or harassed me.
So she keeps me from going out in public when I may not be ready.
And it is strictly platonic between her and Jessie Mae.
Other than that, she has no boundaries or limits on me. Especially now that our two adult daughters know.
We go out shopping (once en femme), and she helps me pick out undies and dresses. and makeup.
She seems to have no issue seeing me in makeup and wig, as this is a journey we are on together.