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I have been thinking about this for years, and I have done research, and I have read what many people here think about how to deal with this. And I have been told about letting the genie out of the bottle. I am 55. I'm ready. So I don't want to self medicate and get cancer. Actually have had melanoma and so far beat it. Not sure if I want to go to India for implants but a possibility. Any solutions?
There are very good surgeons right here in Ontario. It's a big, and expensive step. I've read a few post from girls here that say in guy mode nobody notices their 38C chest. Hmmm...
After a BA you can never go out in guy mode again, unless you want some real seriously strange looks.
Curious, but are you looking to transition completely, Marny? Or is it simply breasts?
Marny,
glue on some forms the size you want - if you can live with them 24/7 for a couple of months, I'd say your ready
Do you plan to live fulltime as a woman? Being a man with real, full breasts may cause all kinds of problems if you wish to remain having a male life (ask an F2M who has to wear a binder what a pain that is.)
As for going to the third world for surgery, well... in addition to the risk involved with surgery in a foreign country, given what is happening in the world right now... there is a risk for sure. I know of folks who have gone to Mexico for cheap surgery (FFS, BA etc.) and had real complications, sometimes you get what you pay for.
[QUOTE=Jennifer in CO;3178026]Marny,
glue on some forms the size you want - if you can live with them 24/7 for a couple of months, I'd say your ready
Sounds like a good suggestion to me!!!!! Give it a try and see how you feel.
Molly
I really think a therapists advice is needed here.
There are a lot of pitfalls in just getting breasts.
You are not likely to have it done without a psychologists report supporting the procedure.
Hi Marny, Be careful what you wish for.
Marny, this is one procedure where buyer's remorse won't help you. You can't return the implants once you got 'em. I think about 8-10K from a reputable plastic surgeon and he won't likely do it without some "shrink" wrapped report.
I've got B cups from gynecomastia and no doubt you've read my tales (as well as others (with G) both good and bad. To reiterate a bit, great for filling your fave bra, not so good for going outside, male jackets don't really fit anymore. If you are married, your wife may not care for them.
www.gynecomastia.org
will provide a lot of testimonials about women's views of men with tits. Last I read, 14K guys had double mastectomies on their dime. G is not covered by insurance.
Even in sweltering heat, I wear a jacket (generally, but sometimes I don't give a damn and just go out in my shirt, and generally get SIRED to death as a smarta$$ remark). At my age-70 in a few weeks- I don't care much but if you are still working, it could be a problem. If you are going all out to TS, well you need a therapist in any case and soon enough you have what you want.
As the Knight said :"you must choose wisely"
Echoing some of the other comments, how big and how soon? At your age, depending on your domestic, employment, and cultural environment, have you considered hormones? You won't get Dolly Parton results, and it takes months to see results (years for full development), but it can yield worthwhile growth with minimal risk. Smaller natural breasts are much easier to minimize and/or conceal in boy mode, and, as one commenter pointed out, thousands of non-TG/CD males actually pay for flat chests if they suffer (depends on one's point of view, eh?) with gynecomastia, a natural enlargement of male breasts, so it's hardly freakish.
With a gender-specialized therapist's help, you should be able to find an understanding endocrinologist and embark on a conservative regimen with regular checkups and blood tests. I took Premarin for about five years in the mid-1980s and eventually filled a B-cup. I would caution against a crash program with multiple drugs.
My only inhibitions today are going shirtless in any public setting, but I was always reticent about that anyway, long before coming to terms with my gender issues more than 30 years ago, but I have said to hell with it a few times without incident. I wear crop tops in boy mode and haven't had any adverse experiences, even golfing in hot weather in a white polo, playing in men's tournaments. It does look like a short "wife-beater" undershirt in basic design, and it actually flattens and firms a bit. End of issue for me.
In girl mode, push the girls into the right position in the right bra (38B for me), and the effect is plenty for my tastes. They bounce a bit, cleavage is possible (if minimal), and they are pleasantly sensitive, which I'm not sure implants are.
Anyway, depends on your circumstances, but there are more choices than implants or forms...
I have similar feelings, but the consequences of being a man with significant breasts are just too major right now IMO. I think you either have you transition in full (which I will not be doing, I'm a CD, not a TS) or accept that you don't have breasts, as much as it would be wonderful to have them.
You might wish to read here the comments in the thread that I started:
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...t=#post3177658
Cheryl Ann
Marny-
As a large alpha male (75" tall, 225 lbs, former gym rat) with 40 Ds since adolescence and compression shirts since adulthood (45 years) I would ask -Do you have to appear as a man ??
For work or family ??
Interestingly the best compression wear is made by WOMEN'S shapewear companies such as Body-Wrap. Maindeform, and Comfort choice- Buy and try to see if it fits your male lifestyle. It has worked for me and I work in a situation of publically changing clothes- looks like a tank top undershirt, hides the girls well.
The advice to try living in forms the size you want is a reality test-good advice.
Surgery is good, but NEVER perfect-you would be risking all sorts of potential disasters(death, infection, PSYCHIC disasters) and it does NOT buy you increased breast nor nipple sensitivity..
Best of luck- especially if you can be her full time !!
Hugs,
Flo
No doubt. A one way trip. AND, don't forget the chest hair. THAT's a vision that'll give nightmares. Of course you can wax, but that would be an interesting visit.Quote:
Originally Posted by tgirlceleste
And then there's me with an attitude. "So what? I happen to have boobs and I can't help it! I was born this way! Get over it and stop staring at me!"
It's your life. It's your body. It's NO one's business!
Cheryl
Marny is in Ontario. Of the four surgeons I talked to, three in Toronto, one in Waterloo, none asked for a therapists reference. That I had been full time over a year may have helped.
Hormones can produce nice bewbs.....but if that is not enough, implants will do.
As a new member I am hesitant to respond to this thread as no one knows me. But it was threads such as this that took me from being a long time lurker to a member.
I recently had a BA, three weeks today as a matter of fact. I went through a period of about 9 months where I wore "rice sizers", both in an attempt to find the size I wanted and to gauge peoples reactions. Then I went on a search to find a plastic surgeon who would do the surgery without a "note of permission" from a therapist. Good luck with that one.
My wife is from the Philippines and such surgeries are common place there. On her last visit home a little over a year ago she searched for and found a ps she was more than happy with. After an exchange of emails and a few phone calls a date was made and the rest as they say is history. As I type I have 40 B's. The surgeon says as the implants drop over the next 6-8 months they will probably and should increase in size just a little. The rice sizers I used were just a tad larger than what I have now.
During the time I wore the sizers only 1 person ever said anything. A few younger women looked twice but never said a word. I tend to wear a t shirt that is way too larger or a button down plaid shirt with pockets on each side to hide the "girls".
Throughout all of this I never thought I would have to either go without the breasts or to completely transition. Short of extra large breasts I don't think a transition is called for someone who simply wants small to medium size breasts.
Also, at 62 years of age I did not see why I needed permission from a shrink to alter my body as I saw fit.
All of the above is simply my .02, not that it was ever worth anything. feel free to jump on me. I will respond in kind. Don't be afraid of hurting my feelings. My wife says my skin is soft like a womans but it's still kinda thick ;)
That is good advice. You should discuss this with a pro, not strangers on an Internet forum. It's a big and pretty much permanent change. Unless you want to live and dress as a female for the rest of your life, this would be a big mistake.Quote:
Originally Posted by Beverley Sims
Just for kicks, try the advice above to glue a set of forms on and go for a few weeks without taking them off. See how it goes. See how people react to you. My guess is that you will be hit with a big does of reality and take them off before you had planned to.
There are plenty of older guys who due to weight fluctuations are now living with substantial breast mass, I'm one of them. I had 'moobs' even when I was in high school, a constant source of embarrasment then, not so much anymore (mostly because I don't subject myself to topless situations). The 'born this way' thing won't change how people feel about you; if you're a guy with female breasts, most people will still feel you're more than a bit odd. But as above, the older you get, the less anyone cares about how you look, and the fewer people who are looking.
thanks jennifer. truth is i have been wearing forms almost 24/7 for ten years. I want to move to the next level and will be happy to take any criticisim. i know what I want. I'm just looking for advice on how to get thereQuote:
Originally Posted by Jennifer in CO
My chest isn't that big (36A/34B), but there isn't much besides a slow walk that I can do comfortably while bra less. I made the mistake of playing basketball with friends last night after work with out my sports bra, I washed it and forgot to put it back in my bag. And since work is pretty much the only place I don't wear a bra, I didn't have anything to wear. I wasn't about to tell my friends that I wasn't gonna play because I forgot my sports bra. So I tried to play through, not going full out just trying to keep the game going. Still had a lot of movement if you know what I mean, and after half an hour I had enough. I was really uncomfortable not only physically but mentally as some creep playing on the other side of the gym kept staring at my chest. My friends know about my chest, and understood why I quit and why I wear a sports bra.
Today, my chest is really sore, I actually have cold cabbage leaves in my sports bra right now. It's amazing that they actually to help relieve breast pain, the first time I tried it I was very skeptical.
So if you want breasts, get them... But make sure you are ready to wear a bra everyday and the "attention" they get from pervs.
Well, that's simple. Get on the Internet and find a surgeon who will give you what you want. Pay your money and take your choice.Quote:
Originally Posted by marny
Me, I would love to wake up each morning with a pair of DDs, but I know that it's impractical for me. Wife, family, friends, neighbors, doctors, etc. I don't want to explain it over and over again and I participate in activities where the males are shirtless so that would require me to wear some sort of breast cover. A guy with boobs is pretty wierd. Many men who have gynecomastia spend thousands of dollars to have their breasts reduced.
Hi Marny ...You seem to have thought this out, and you would know what reactions to expect if you've been wearing forms 24/7 for ten years...Celeste is right - we have good surgeons here in Ontario who'll gladly take your money. .I got great results just from HRT and over a couple of years developed nice 36 C's with all natural sensations intact .
Linda
Thank you all so much for your input. We are all fortunate that we can have such open discussions about our feelings.