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Thread: Do you ever feel like your a freak show

  1. #1
    Aspiring Member StephanieT's Avatar
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    Do you ever feel like your a freak show

    Today I had an opportunity to be dressed and go out shopping. It was a good day and I even had a GG say hi to me in the Kohls parking lot as a friendly gesture. I needed some groceries so I went to the Grocery store. I ran into a Mom and her 2 daughters. The first time I went by they just stared. It seems like I ran into them on every isle and they kept staring. I tried waiting for a while in one isle but I still ran into them on the next few isles. I felt so uncomfortable. I know it is to be expected but I hate it when this happens.

  2. #2
    Silver Member Teri Jean's Avatar
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    Sometimes people can be cruel and then some do not know what to think or say. It must have been the same when women started to wear pants. Don't worry about it and be careful. Keli

  3. #3
    Aspiring Member dilane's Avatar
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    Sorry you had a bad time. Rude people are tough to take.

    One of my more confrontational friends would have simply stared them down.

    I usually either 1) Smile, or 2) Leave.

    The quick smile often works on women pretty even if they're positive they've clocked you. It throws them off to have you respond in the usual female friendly way. However, it's hard to do when you're on your heels.

    -- Diane

  4. #4
    Miss Conception Karren H's Avatar
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    Nope.... I never feel that way.....
    Current Obsession - Breasts and Lingerie!

    .......My Photos

  5. #5
    Silver Member trannie T's Avatar
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    As a 300 pound 6'3" 60 year old in a dress I am amazed when people are not staring at me. Does it stop me from going out? Hell no.
    It takes a real man to wear a dress.

  6. #6
    Aspiring Member StephanieT's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by trannie T View Post
    Does it stop me from going out? Hell no.
    It won't stop me from going out. It is just an uncomfortable part of being a CD. Most of the time, I just have fun.

  7. #7
    Silver Member gennee's Avatar
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    Kept going

    [SIZE="3"]I remember a woman tried to stare me down whle I dined with friends. I just kept on enjoying myself.

    Gennee
    [/SIZE]


    I'm getting better with age. I may have started late, but better late than never!

    "Don't let anyone define who you are".

  8. #8
    Pantyhose forever! joann07's Avatar
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    I don't let anyone make me feel uncomfortable when I'm out.
    I'm always smiling and very friendly with anyone I encounter.

    Every once in a blue moon I can sense someone looking at me with that typical stare, but I just go about my business and act like I don't see them at all. If I'm not doing any harm to them, or anyone, why should they care?

    Hugs!
    Last edited by joann07; 02-24-2009 at 04:33 PM.
    JoAnn

    I love to see a beautiful woman in a nice dress, but then again, I also want to wear that dress.

  9. #9
    Kisses! KM Krystyna_Marie's Avatar
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    I don't have to go out and get pinched for me to feel like a freak show. Sometimes I feel that way all by myself

    Most of the time I'm fine, but other times I feel like there's no one else in the world who thinks the way I do . . . but then I come here, and to Lauras-Playground, and I'm among friends again, and I feel much, much better and less isolated!

    Kisses- KM

  10. #10
    Silver Member Tina B.'s Avatar
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    That's the kind of thing that keeps a lot of us in the closet, be proud of yourself, for not letting them keep you there.
    Tina

  11. #11
    Gold Member
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    Sometimes I do, like if I am wearing my high heel sandals and someone is staring at my feet.

    Quote Originally Posted by Karren Hutton View Post
    Nope.... I never feel that way.....
    Not even when buying sandpaper to do your legs?

  12. #12
    Gender Outlaw! vikki2020's Avatar
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    Nothing you can do about the way some people react,but think of all the others you ran into that reacted positively, like the lady in the parking lot! If your out enough, your going to run into a few goofs now and then.
    "And if you want some fun, sing Ob-Bla-Di-Bla-Da!"

  13. #13
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I USED to feel that way ALL THE TIME, Steph!

    Then, I stopped wearing my contacts when I dress,
    I started looking a LOT LESS LIKE A CD, and more like a woman! And the uncomfortable feeling went away!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  14. #14
    Aspiring Member marny's Avatar
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    Wondering how old u r stephanie? Past 50 most of us don't give a flying f___! what anybody thinks!

  15. #15
    Silver Member Lisa Golightly's Avatar
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    Oh I often get the jitters... which is not too good for someone in my position... It tends to happen when I'm 'too' conscious of myself... It can be as innocent as thinking I look too masculine in the mirror that morning and then it just keeps impacting during the day...

    If someone just treats me male, or uses a male title out of the blue on a positive day I'll either *sigh* and roll my eyes... or feel my anger go from zero to boiling point in a nano second... Which I have to control as they wouldn't like me when I'm angry... I think my handbag must weigh at least 30lbs
    Der Transsexuellaußenseiter

    The lovers have flown...

    [SIZE="3"]VENI VIDI VICI[/SIZE]

  16. #16
    Diamond Member Persephone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by joann07 View Post
    I don't let anyone make me feel uncomfortable when I'm out. I'm always smiling and very friendly with anyone I encounter.

    Every once in a blue moon I can sense someone looking at me with that typical stare, but I just go about my business and act like I don't see them at all. If I'm not doing any harm to them or anyone why should they care?
    Totally!
    "If you are living the life you want to live you've successfully transitioned to being the person you want to be." - Eryn.

    "If you truly care about me you should damn well want for me what I want for myself" - Michael Westen (Burn Notice)

    -.-. --.-/-.-. --.-/-.-. -../ Persephone™ and Persephone™ are trademarks of Persephone herself, accept no substitutes. The terms "en femme" and "en drab" originated with Marcia Sampson/Staylace (OBM).

  17. #17
    Ain't love grand :-) Jess_cd32's Avatar
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    I don't think they meant to be intentionally cruel or anything, they were probably just curious about you. How often do you think they (the kids) see a cd in their lives, this may have been their first. If Mom wasn't there I bet the kids would have asked some funny and interesting questions and had a look of amazement on their faces

    Now I probably don't even want to know what Mom said to them later on, could be wrong though.

  18. #18
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    Most people don't have the guts to bare their feelings openly and wear them like a garment or wear their heart on their sleeve so to speak, we do. Besides, I never assume anyone else is any better or worse than me. The old sayings about pointing a finger with three pointing back and the pot calling the kettle black apply. Hold your head up and be proud of who you are as a good friend of mine likes to say.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  19. #19
    Just the girl next door. Michelle_Tokyo's Avatar
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    I have felt this way yes. I nearly bumped into a young couple at the front desk at the hotel where I was staying, lost my poise and made a very unladylike near fall. This drew their gaze and they realized I was not a real woman and started laughing. It hurt. I wanted to cry. But I held my head high and proceeded to the hotel bar. Had a drink and soon another lady came and sat near me and at one point complimented me on my necklace. It erased entirely the prior bad moment. There will be times ladies, but be strong and be graceful.

    Michelle

  20. #20
    Silver Member JoAnne Wheeler's Avatar
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    NO - not anymore - I really don't care what people say and think - I am who I am - I can not change it - I do not bring it up out of respect to my Spouse, my family, my co-workers and my social contacts - HOWEVER, if it does come up, I will tell them the TRUTH

    JoAnne Wheeler

  21. #21
    Ivy
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    It is uncomfortable. I do think that some people who stare are not trying to be cruel, it's human curiousity. I've read here how many of us have said we've never seen another CD while shopping, and we are certainly more aware of it. People know about it and have maybe seen someone on tv, but never in real life. I have had to check myself when I've seen someone out of the ordinary, and then it becomes, "don't stare, but don't purposely avoid looking at them either". Sometimes I end up staring at a unique person because I think they are really interesting in a good way.

    There will always be those who laugh or stare judgementally, but I have to agree with examples of other replies, somebody out of the bunch will find you interesting, and it more than makes up for the bad.

  22. #22
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    You engaged the enemy at 12:00 high. You didn't say their ages, but safe to say anywhere from 5-15 years old is the toughest crowd you will ever encounter. They will read any one of us in a heartbeat, and react openly.

    That said, are you going to mold your life to the expectations of immature girls who are no where near comfortable in their own skin, and may never be?

    Indeed there are a lot of "adults" that don't understand what we are trying to accomplish here. Society buries the idea of gender so deeply and so soon ( the moment you are born) that to try go against the tide is gutsy.

    Freak show, not on your life. Any more than a lone african american person in a lilly white suburban neighborhood shopping mall. Stand proud, accept the idea that we are good people with an extra dimension, blessed or cursed with a brain that has 2 genders when most people have only one. Or one gender that doesn't happen to match what is about 30" below our head.
    Karen Francis

  23. #23
    Member Kelli Michelle's Avatar
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    I have found young girls seem to notice things a lot more than their moms or dads. They were probably bored and looking for something different. Hopefully, this experience will give their moms a chance to educate them (one can hope).

    Myself, i do feel self-conscious occasionally, and get nervous. But once I am out there, no way am I gonna let anyone spoil my time.

    Please don't let them throw you off. When you think about it, the number of people that are rude like that, is small. The vast majority are too busy to even see you, and if so to make a comment. Heck even ggs get stared at for one reason or another (skirt too short, looking unkempt, whatever). They just take it in stride cause those kind of things are rare, as I would assume with you getting stared at.

    Have fun, and hang in there.
    The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.
    - Dolly Parton

  24. #24
    Rust Member trisha59's Avatar
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    Maybe they were just jealous of how good you looked.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC][SIZE="3"]Wild Women Never Get The Blues[/SIZE]

  25. #25
    Member Tess's Avatar
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    Young kids are curious. When they see something out of the ordinary they stare. My SO has an obvious medical condition which draws attention because it is rare. Kids stare at her and so do unthinking adults. It certainly isn't comfortable for her but she has learned to ignore it rather than live a sheltered existence.

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