Questions from a writer....
Hi! I’m wondering if I can pick your brains for some info about transvestites (m to f). I am a woman writing a fictional story about a transvestite and I would like it to be as truthful as possible. It is my aim that my character gain empathy with an audience of all types, and to dispel any misunderstandings that the unwashed public may have about transvestites specifically. It is very important to me that my character be as authentic as possible. I also ask for your permission to peek into other threads. Although I am Bisexual and find transvestites rather fascinating, I understand that what you write in your threads is personal and meant for other transvestites and you may not want certain people poking in. I did peek a little already, but really only to see if there were any similar threads to mine so I wouldn’t be redundant.
I have already done a great deal of research, and am now at the point where only actual transvestites can push me further. I hope anyone reading this will trust me when I say that I am 100% serious and have the greatest amount of respect for you. I would very much appreciate it if you would answer any of the following questions, and please feel free to add any insights you think may help. And please forgive me if any of the questions offend you--- I swear that is not my purpose. Again, authenticity is my aim. If you wish to answer me privately, you can send me a PM and I will certainly appreciate your time and effort. (And I won’t use anyone’s name of course.)
Oh…my character is a very closeted transvestite until he is discovered by his wife. He is then somewhat forced (somewhat relieved) to then go out and find his true self and a way of life that will lead to his happiness. My questions are based on HIM, and I am aware that they may not be appropriate for all types.
Questions (Answer any or all as you please).
1. If you are a closeted transvestite and afraid of discovery (and therefore may have to “make do” without a full-on change), what is the ONE most important article of cross-dressing that will satisfy your urge? Also, how aggravating is it to not be able to do whatever you would like to do? Do you imagine yourself as a woman or fantasize about being one when cross-dressed?
2. Have you ever sworn off cross-dressing and purged, only to drift back into it? Is that a pattern that has been repeated throughout your life? And if so, can you pin-point the reason you go back to it after a period of not doing it? Did that fill you with shame or were you mostly relieved?
3. Have you ever been discovered by a spouse? What was her reaction? Did you try and stop to keep your relationship together? Is it impossible to stop?
4. Have you ever sought professional help in trying to understand your need to cross-dress, and was that successful or a waste of time? Gone to a support group?
5. What is your one greatest heartache associated with your own personal cross-dressing experiences? Greatest joy?
6. Does it irritate you that most people lump transvestites in with drag-queens and assume you are gay if you aren’t?
7. Do club-style drag queens and she-males that pose in pornographic ways offend you or embarrass you? Have other transvestites irritated you because of the way they’re dressed? (Too showy or obvious, for example?)
8. If you are hiding the fact that you cross-dress from your co-workers, or anyone else, do you refrain from shaving, tweezing your eyebrows, or making any other noticeable physical change or do you go ahead and risk it?
9. Are you frustrated by the fact that transvestites seem to always be portrayed in films as the odd-ball character used for comic relief, or even the murderous wacko rather than a regular person?
10. Do you admire such people as David Bowie and Eddie Izzard for trying to break down clothing barriers or does that not concern you at all? How do you feel about “men in skirts”---men who dress far more masculine than most transvestites, such as wearing a kilt and a sports jacket? Or rather, men who don’t make any attempt to be feminine, but just want to push the envelope when it comes to wearing skirts? Do you think that would be a positive thing or does it just add one more layer of confusion? (see link): http://www.stannards.co.uk/Kilts.htm
11. Do all transvestites create a girl’s name for themselves when “en femme”, and how important is it to you that you be called by that name while cross-dressed? Do you prefer your friends and family to use the words “she” and “her”, ect. while talking to you when cross-dressed or do you let it slide?
12. How important is it to you that you act feminine, as well as dress as such? Do you feel transgendered? Do you feel like a male with a strong feminine side or do you feel like two separate personalities? If you feel like two separate personalities, do you think that society is responsible because of it’s “one or the other” view toward sexuality?
13. When you first went out in public cross-dressed, what happened? Do you find most people at least tolerant or do they act like jerks? Have you ever been physically assaulted while cross-dressed or asked to leave a public place? Do you understand it if people laugh or does it really bother you? Hurt you? Do you fight back or just try and get out of there in one piece?
14. Have you ever passed as a woman in public, and is that important to you?
15. Are you envious of transvestites that are “out” when you’re not?
16. Do you find yourself more tolerant of alternate sexualities or do you think you have the “usual” amount of acceptance?
17. If you thought you could, would you cross-dress 24/7 or do you feel an equal need to be masculine at times?
18. Do you feel that the world has a long, long way to go before transvestites will be able to blend in with ease and have no worries while dressed in public or do you have hope that you‘ll see that in your lifetime?
19. How important is it to you to make love to your partner while cross-dressed?
20. Are you only attracted to very feminine women?
Okay, I think that’s good for now. If you tell me to get lost, believe me I’ll understand. If not, I’d love to be able to come back sometime and ask a few more questions if you don’t mind.
Thank you very much,
S.
Originally Posted by susandrea
