Big decision on dressing up in public, any advice?

[Samantha Girl]

So I've decided to maybe dress up in public for the 1st time ever. Now I know my pics seem to bely this fact but I am really shy. Obviously I've gotten better as I've gotten older but I'm still shy, so I am kinda terrified! The closest I've come is my back porch at 4am! But at this point I just feel like why wait?

Here's the thing, I'm moving from North Jersey to Washington state very soon. I have worked, hung out, gone to school and generally been in love with NYC my whole life so... I just feel like the 1st time I go out in public dressed up as Samantha SHOULD be in NYC! I know, I know, nuts right? Since I'm leaving and it's just so crazy there anyway, why not NYC?!

At the same time it does feel kinda crazy. Sooooo, what do you girls think? Should Samantha make her public debut in NYC, or save it for the West Coast?

[leggylisa]

I suppose this isn't going to help you much, but i wouldn't want to push you out the door if it's not something you really think you could do. Myself it's not for me, its kinda of a big life desicion in my opinion and im happy to do what i do in the comfort of my own home with only you guys (and my wife) to know about it

[DawnRodgers]

I say that if your ready, go for it. I think it would make more sense and also make it easier if you first go out in familiar territory so that you always kow where you are and the quickest way home if you need it. As your comfort lrvrl rises, you can go further afield. Otherwise, it could be a while until you get a chance.

[Samantha Girl]

Thanks for responding so quickly You both make good points. I know where you're coming from Perkalite, only recently decided I wanted to give it shot. Dana, I think I'm ready

[Carin]

Once you get NYC under you belt, the west coast will be a breeze. Go for it.

[Lisa Golightly]

I'm terribly shy... painfully so. The first time I dressed publicly, locally, I had issues about being seen by someone I knew, and the first time I dressed in another part of the country I had issues about not knowing the area.

Guess in the end where ever you are you just have to go for it... and try to look above the pavement... I was hopeless like that for a while. x

[PaulaJaneThomas]

If you think about it too much you'll start coming up with excuses not to go out. Just go for it. Dress casually and go out in daylight when there's plenty of other women out and about. For shoes, wear flats or a low heel. Relax and enjoy being you.

[DanaR]

If you overdress, you will be noticed. Dress casually and have fun.

[Fab Karen]

It helps to have some activity to do when you go out- shopping, getting a coffee or a meal- so you can focus on what you're doing & let go of worrying about what people may be thinking ( do you worry about it when out as a guy? ).

[SweetCaroline]

You wouldn't know it from from the number of times I've been out, but I've been painfully shy most of my life as well. I don't know what will work for you, but I can tell you in my case, nothing helped me come out of my shell like going out. You might be surprised at out you find.

I say if your ready, go for it. You'll wonder why you spent so much time waiting.

Good luck.

[tricia_uktv]

Wherever you do it be confident, almost arrogant. Imagine the place is your own. Go for it girl, strut your stuff!

[Sally24]

It helps to have someone to go out with. Barring that, find a friendly venue in the city to go to.

If you decide you want to do this than go a little conservative. If going to a club or bar than you can wear something a little flashy, but don't make it very short. My first few times I just went shopping. I wore a cute top and well fitting jeans. Sort of the "uniform" of american women now.

Good luck!

[Patricia Jane]

Just Do It. Dress so you fit in, nothing over the wall. Dress as you see others dressing.

[Stormgirl]

Well, I think you should go out dressed in NYC because you're going to reflect on the past and regret not going out dressed in NYC.

Just grab a bunch of friends and just do it, what do you have to lose? Life is short anyways right? Just be safe though.

And I'm terribly shy too(like Lisa) btw

[StacyCD]

It's an opportunity that may not come again. Go for it!

[gerdaberlin]

perhaps dress in fem jeans first to build up confidence,
or take a bike to move at whatever speed suitable!
public transportation for a starter is too stressful IMO, I just started 2 weeks ago, you do and dont get read, so you feel your identity kinda oscillate back and forth..
go for it!

[Chrissie P]

Take baby steps. Drive to the ATM, drop mail off at the drive thru deposit at the post office, etc. Maybe next time get out of the car and walk to the ATM.

I started that way, most of the time during the off hours when things were not busy. Best time to try it is early AM. Everyone else is still half asleep and could care less.

As others have said, dress casually. I like to do errands in just jeans, sneaks and a velour top for exercising. I pull my hair back and wear a hat. Kinda like mom going out to do stuff.

You will be surprised at how enjoyable it is to get gas, go to the bank and all the stuff you used to hate doing.

[TGMarla]

Really, if you're going to go out, NYC is just the place to do it. No where else on Earth are you going to find a more diverse set of people. If anyone were to read you, they'd think nothing of it, since the city has examples of every kind of person imaginable. They'd just think, "Hey, look...a guy dressed like a girl.....that figures. It's New York!" Then they'd go on their merry way, and so would you. It's an ideal place to crossdress.

[docrobbysherry]

Why ANYONE would want to go out dressed?

Unless it was with OTHER CD/TG girls. Or, to a CD/TG event!

I LOVE my SAFE, FRIENDLY closet!

[PaulaJaneThomas]

Why ANYONE would want to go out dressed?

Because people might stare if I went out naked.

I LOVE my SAFE, FRIENDLY closet!

I love my fairly safe and friendly country even if I do end up getting wet sometimes.

[BreenaDion]

Tricia uktv is right Samantha . In a real blunt way you have to say F***it an not care what others think. Be true to yourself an go out as Samantha. Be totally confident in your attitude towards every one .. If you are Samantha then become her get your mind set an stay that way . If you deviate from Samantha Others will surely notice that your very uncomfortable with yourself. Can you practice this exercize and Maybe try Tapas Acupressure Technigue. It totally works for me .

Good luck Samantha Love Bree

[Sally2005]

I did what you want to do a few years ago. I was scared to death to go out and I am a shy quiet guy so that made it really difficult to build up the courage. I dressed in an doctor's office building in the woman's bathroom. I should have picked the family one that allows you to lock the door because when I was dressing in one stall a women entered and used to adjacent stall. I am sure she could hear my heart pounding. Dress up at home as much as you can and cover up with your male clothes if you need to. My first couple times out I just drove around and took small walks. Now for the most part I can dress up and feel confident enough to walk through a crowed mall in daylight. The one last thing I need to work on is my voice so I don't talk much with people, but once you get a look that blends in well enough and you become confident and smile at people it gets easier. Set yourself the goal and just do it. You will not regret it. Whatever happens, it is a learning experience that will benefit you in the rest of your life. For me, I'm still quiet, but not as shy and I feel a whole lot better about myself than I used to.

[suchacutie]

It's a big city but if you know it, or at least part of it, then you've got an advantage. In one sense, look at the possibilities:

Pick a night, dressed in drab, and go to the Village and look around at where you might want to go. Plan it out a bit and then look at what women are wearing. Let's say you take a Wednesday. Check out the area below Washington Park and east of NYU, for example, or pick another couple of blocks you might be familiar with. Get there about 3pm. Have a coffee, a meal, go to a couple of night spots, decide when you plan to leave when you come back, and then do the same thing, or get a room somewhere there in the Village.

Then, the next week, go back the same night and do it again. This gives some security and an idea of what to expect. It also gives you an itinerary and a plan. Take away as much of the uncertainty as possible, dress conservatively, do your makeup as best you can, and that conservative as well, plan out how you'll redo that makeup often, and with all those details figured out all that there will be left is to have a good time .

just my

tina

[JulieC]

I can't imagine you being out of place in NYC. I spent a lot of time in NYC growing up (though I lived elsewhere in the tri-state area). Nothing is weird there or really much out of place. Most (if ANY) New Yorkers just won't care.

There's parts of the city it would not be good to go to, and I think you know those. Outside of that, go have fun!

[renee k]

I say, go for it. LIke others have said, NYC is the place, especially, in the village. Just hop off the Path at Christopher Street.

Huggs, Renee