I am confused. I am a happily married cd with a mostly accepting wife (she let me be the bride when we were married). We have a brady bunch family, my kids are gone with there own lives (girl 23 with own kids and nearly husband, boy living with gf). My wife's kids all live with us, boy19, girls 16 and 11. I am 48 and she is 44. She has known about me right from the start (6 years). My problem is I am getting more and more into girl mode and don't have many opportunuties to dress, which has me getting more and more frustrated. She won't let me tell the kids (I think they know anyway but not sure)and so when I want to go out, I can't coz I have nowhere to get ready. I also find my self more and more attracted to other cd's and find myself wanting to explore my sexuality. This is also tied in with watching a few of my collegues from work die and realising how fragile life really is.
So hence my dilema. I love my wife and do not want to hurt her, but I also want to get out and experience things before it is too late. Greedy little sucker aren't I!!
I know there probably isn't an answer out there that I will be happy with, I just felt the need to just express how I feel. I can only see two options, give up the woman I love to explore how I feel, or forever wonder. Hmmm I might just ponder on how difficult life can be sometimes.
But then again,I have a wonderful lady, kids who love me, grandkids who love me (but are to young to know it yet LOL how could they not?) a job I really enjoy and summer is coming (well in the southern part of the world).
But then again its the many major decisions in life that suck, like can I get away with a bikini or does a 48 yo need a one piece????
I think its way to hard sometimes