Is Lying on Hot or Not Wrong?

[AmberDay]

Yes lying is bad. But I lie all the time on every form I fill out that asks if I am male or female. I am neither, but I am FORCED to choose one of the TWO choices anyway. I lie and say male. If I put female I would still be lying. There is no third option. I would love to see:

Male__
Female__
Other__

That way I wouldn't have to lie anymore. I am male on the outside and female on the inside. I am tired of having to let society tell me what my gender is. I hate lying, but until they put the third option I will keep lying and say that I am male.



Amber

[trannie T]

If you were attempting to turn tricks or swindle some poor love starved fool out of his life savings it would be wrong. Otherwise on "Hot or Not" there are more liars than at a political convention. You have no intention of causing any harm and it is very unlikely that any harm will come from your deception.

I have yet to rate your photo, if you wish for a good rating please send a photo of your boobs.

[ClaudiaDawn]

Lying? Does this mean you are not a real woman?
O M G !!!!!!




Hugs,

Claudia Dawn

[TSchapes]

... On the other other hand... that site is also used for matchmaking. The first thing I saw when I clicked on your link was the question whether I want to meet Kathi. If you decide to push it just a bit farther and see how well you "perform" in person, and a straight guy meets up with you... heaven help you when, not if, he finds out. I myself would beat some sense into you if I arranged a date thinking you had all the right plumbing and found out you were a guy.

Sorry Ralphie, you'd go to jail for laying one finger on any transgal in this situation. Allen Andrade thought he would get away with the "Transgender Surprise Defense" when he beat Angie Zapata to death. But he got 60 years to life.

So before you start talking with your fists, you might just want to walk away...

-Tracy

[Heather Daniels]

You're a real class act Ralph.

[sherryleigh]

What is are hot or not..not that my opinion matters. Is it part of this site or something else? BTW You are Hot

[Ralph]

Sorry Ralphie, you'd go to jail for laying one finger on any transgal in this situation. Allen Andrade thought he would get away with the "Transgender Surprise Defense" when he beat Angie Zapata to death.

Good grief, I never mean to suggest that's a defensible position to take or even a smart thing to do. And for a variety of reasons, I would never actually harm someone - although looking back over my statement, anyone who does not know me in person would read that as a serious threat.

My point was to use hyperbole for dramatic effect so as to stress that it's a really, really, really, really, really, really bad idea for a person with the guy hardware, no matter how much "he" wants to believe he's female, to represent himself as such to a heterosexual male meeting in person for romantic and/or sexual contact. In such circumstances, I would be enraged and likely let loose with every misanthropic vulgarity I could think of and make up a few more for effect. But no matter how illegal or morally wrong or unjustifiable physical assault is, a frighteningly large proportion of the male population will not stop at verbal abuse once beyond the rage threshold. Note that I'm not saying you deserve it; I'm just saying that is the likely outcome of employing deception for an in-person encounter.

In any case, Kathi emphasized that she doesn't intend to meet anyone in person (which I should have realized when she said she also lied about location), so none of that applies.

Totally agree about lying on forms that demand personal information - I feel a brief twinge of guilt but for privacy reasons I always give a fictitious name and/or address, and certainly never a real phone number or email address.

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

Is it wrong to do this? What do you think?

I didn't skim the whole thread. Apologies if I'm repeating someone already.

First off, you look great, Kathi. Seriously - you should get a lot of positive feedback there, I'm sure (and probably have already).

Secondly, yes. I think it's wrong. I don't say that in a "shame on you", tone - just sharing my personal opinion of it.

Any online accounts I sign up for, I always explain who I am as a transgender. I do sign up for accounts as "female" rather than male, but that is because that is the gender-mode I am in. Regardless of gender checked, it is always clearly spelled out in my profiles - nothing hidden.

[TheNewDanielle]

Umm it's hot or not, who cares.....really it's just another avenue to see if you can "pass." I've thought about doing it, haven't done it yet as I haven't quite worked up the cajone's enough to do it so...eh whatever. It's just another test and you know Kathy I bet it felt nice knowing that people really think your hot (you are) who aren't on the website and just plain don't know, you'll never meet any of them nor probably talk to them so use it for what it is a tool to help your own curiosity and as an ego boost. Everyday on this website there's a post asking if so and so would "pass" honeslty you all are great, but no one on here is going to tell you that you wouldn't or that your ugly. That's not what we're here for, we support you and try and help you. So yeah it's a lie, if anyone say's they've never lied before I would LOVE To meet them. This is what it is, fun.

[TSchapes]

Good grief, I never mean to suggest that's a defensible position to take or even a smart thing to do. And for a variety of reasons, I would never actually harm someone - although looking back over my statement, anyone who does not know me in person would read that as a serious threat.

OK, I may have overreacted. But, I didn't want that comment to go un-challenged. I see too much of that kind of thing on Youtube comments and even the CNN article I linked to about Angie Zapata, the commentators were trying to lay it all on Angie. I agree you should not deceive a lover. It's stupid behavior.

I just dislike the threat of violence. I'm sorry I overreacted.

-Tracy

[KimberlyJo]

OK, I may have overreacted. But, I didn't want that comment to go un-challenged. I see too much of that kind of thing on Youtube comments and even the CNN article I linked to about Angie Zapata, the commentators were trying to lay it all on Angie. I agree you should not deceive a lover. It's stupid behavior.

I just dislike the threat of violence. I'm sorry I overreacted.

-Tracy

I don't think you overreacted, I felt the same way you did when I read Ralph's comment. Violence against transgendered people in this country is all to common and so its a touchy subject. I wouldn't expect to find such a statement here of all places.

[Tracii G]

Naw its Ok.
I posted on there just for fun but in my key words I used CD never stated my gender.
I have meet quite a few nice CDers on there.

[Miranda09]

Wow Kathi. This thread has brought forth a wide variety of opinions on this matter. But, for those of you that have responded with an "it's wrong viewpoint," let me just say this. If any of you have ever used a dedicated dating site (I've used at least 20), you'll eventually find out that there's a lot of deceiving, or should I say an omission of certain truths, that many (not all) users omit from their profile. That's just the way it is and it can range from lying about one's age to lying about one's marital status. So what...it's all anonyous anyway until you actually meet that person, which is rarely. Why do you think people post their profiles under an anonymous name?? Anyway, that's my final 2 cents worth.

[Laurie909]

Kathi,

My EYES don't lie.

So I would have to rate you HOT.

[kay_jessica]

Kathi- I consider myself a new member here. I have always considered your opinions up to now as having been well considered and balanced.How can you in all conscience expcect me to believe you ever again if you LIE?
Laura.

Laurap, unless your name really is Luarap, are YOU not lying on this very site?

Kay (and no Kay is not my real name)

[Kathi Lake]

Laurap, unless your name really is Luarap, are YOU not lying on this very site?

Kay (and no Kay is not my real name)

Kay, LauraP actually PM'd me about 8-10 hours after posting, apologizing for her post. She realized that she may have been a bit too hasty in her first thoughts.

Everyone, thank you so much for your feedback. I didn't think that it would turn into a near-bloodbath! I'm usually pretty non-confrontational. I'm the type of girl who usually tries to make sure everyone is getting along, not one who is stirring the pot. I didn't mean for everyone to get so worked up. Can't we talk about hair and makeup instead? How about kittens? Fluffy kittens! Aren't they the cutest things ever?!

Once again, to reiterate, since Gabrielle and others may not have read the entire angst-filled post; I joined a website - HotOrNot.com. I joined as a female to see how I would rate/pass as a female, without letting others know that I was a male, thereby polluting the "data." I am not using it as a dating service or to meet men (ewwwww!), so my safety will not be compromised. As an unintended side benefit, I am collecting some really bad pickup lines, which I may post somewhere in the future.

All right everyone, let's go to the Shopping and Makeup threads!

Kathi

[MissConstrued]

Everyone, thank you so much for your feedback. I didn't think that it would turn into a near-bloodbath!

Did you forget that this is the Internet?

[kellycan27]

OK, I admit it. In a moment of weakness, I signed up on Hot or Not as a woman. Yes, I am getting plenty of validation as a woman when going out shopping around here. I get plenty of validation on this site. I just wondered what the public at large would think of me. So, I signed up.

Is it wrong to do this? What do you think?

Kathi

p.s. here's my page: http://www.hotornot.com/m/r/?emid=ESEYEYH

This is my page kathi. You look beautiful, and you have done nothing wrong. Any of you others want to girl up and admit that you have posted your pic?


http://www.hotornot.com/r/?eid=KMG8BLAS&key=VEH

[Miranda09]

Here's mine Kathi. I think you look beautiful, and have done nothing wrong. Anyone esle want to girl-up and admit they have also posted ?

http://www.hotornot.com/p?action=photos

Actually yes..I'm playing around with that idea myself. I'm really curious as to how I measure up!!

[Miranda09]

Kay, LauraP actually PM'd me about 8-10 hours after posting, apologizing for her post. She realized that she may have been a bit too hasty in her first thoughts.

Everyone, thank you so much for your feedback. I didn't think that it would turn into a near-bloodbath! I'm usually pretty non-confrontational. I'm the type of girl who usually tries to make sure everyone is getting along, not one who is stirring the pot. I didn't mean for everyone to get so worked up. Can't we talk about hair and makeup instead? How about kittens? Fluffy kittens! Aren't they the cutest things ever?!

Once again, to reiterate, since Gabrielle and others may not have read the entire angst-filled post; I joined a website - HotOrNot.com. I joined as a female to see how I would rate/pass as a female, without letting others know that I was a male, thereby polluting the "data." I am not using it as a dating service or to meet men (ewwwww!), so my safety will not be compromised. As an unintended side benefit, I am collecting some really bad pickup lines, which I may post somewhere in the future.

All right everyone, let's go to the Shopping and Makeup threads!

Kathi

Oooooh. Did someone say shopping???

[kellycan27]

Actually yes..I'm playing around with that idea myself. I'm really curious as to how I measure up!!

It's actually kind of fun.... and contrary to what some may think....harmless when done in the spirit which was intended.... A rating from unbiased strangers.

[Kathi Lake]

Did you forget that this is the Internet?

Doh! You're right, MC. I forgot that the Internet can be a cold place.

This is my page kathi. You look beautiful, and you have done nothing wrong. Any of you others want to girl up and admit that you have posted your pic?


http://www.hotornot.com/r/?eid=KMG8BLAS&key=VEH

Thanks, Kelly. I've always loved that picture of yours. Maybe it's the boots. Yee ha, cowgirl!

Kathi

[Ralph]

In the context of "Just for fun, I want to see what others think of me" it would be a real interesting experiment to post your best picture on the site and explicitly state that you're a straight male crossdresser. Wonder what kind of feedback you'd get then? I'd do it myself if I didn't want to avoid being recognized by someone who knows my face.

[kellycan27]

In the context of "Just for fun, I want to see what others think of me" it would be a real interesting experiment to post your best picture on the site and explicitly state that you're a straight male crossdresser. Wonder what kind of feedback you'd get then? I'd do it myself if I didn't want to avoid being recognized by someone who knows my face.

I'd be lying if I said that.........

[Edwina]

In the context of "Just for fun, I want to see what others think of me" it would be a real interesting experiment to post your best picture on the site and explicitly state that you're a straight male crossdresser. Wonder what kind of feedback you'd get then? I'd do it myself if I didn't want to avoid being recognized by someone who knows my face.

I tried that. My photo was NOT APPROVED
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...ictureid=11956
Seems you have to lie

Edwina