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Thread: heterogirls & transboys

  1. #26
    New Member emoglassesenvy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shikyo View Post
    That alone should make him feel better about the whole situation. I'm glad he has found such a nice and understanding girlfriend, nyaa.
    hehe


    Quote Originally Posted by Shikyo View Post
    Are both of your parents American or is one of the Japanese? Because I think the origin might have rather a lot effect into their reaction. Also the way they were brought up etc. How are you parents usually with gay people and other not so normal poeple. If they don't seem to have anything against them, the chances are they are not going to take it badly are high.
    nah, they're both white americans and i don't think they know any gay or "not so normal" people.. ah well, i've pretty much decided i'm not going to tell them this time around. maybe ever. we'll see how far this relationship goes first


    Quote Originally Posted by Shikyo View Post
    If you both are truly serious about the matter, of you two loving each other. I don't really think there are any parents who would get mad about it. Anyway, it has to be told sooner or later, there is no way around that.
    yeah that's what i'm banking on if eventually things ever come out~

    thanks for the input!

  2. #27
    Mostly Harmless...
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    Quote Originally Posted by emoglassesenvy View Post
    hehe
    Just the truth. Not so many of us are lucky to have understanding partners. From what I've gathered and found out that there are rather a lot transsexuals aren't even able to find partners and live their lives alone.

    nah, they're both white americans and i don't think they know any gay or "not so normal" people.. ah well, i've pretty much decided i'm not going to tell them this time around. maybe ever. we'll see how far this relationship goes first
    Then I could imagine them having easier time to accept the different in the relationship of yours. My parents nor relatives had no issues with me being transsexual, however they aren't American. With just the Japanese culture there are some things that are harder for them to accept than for us it is.

    yeah that's what i'm banking on if eventually things ever come out~

    thanks for the input!
    You're welcome. I'll be glad to help you out if there is any way I can. I know how hard a situation like this is, though from the other side of the coin. It will never be quite the same no matter how you look at it. Just brings some more harder times when you will have to choose not to tell, or other complications like the issue with sex. But all in all, if you are in love it will be worth it. I can assure you that.
    I look like a Girl
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    A cute Kitty I am!

  3. #28
    OCD Cartoonist Whackadoo hiro's Avatar
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    Dude, Haruna Ai rocks so hard. She's so awesome.

    Okay, gushing aside... I apologize that I can't give you specific advice about MTFs, or transgender or anything like that. I do wanna say, though, I wouldn't rush him with questions. I think this holds true for just about anything exotic, especially something as personal as this, but the general tendency is that people usually aren't that fond of answering millions of questions about something that sets them apart, except, maybe, an area of study or expertise. It seems like you're really curious as a result of this being new to you. It's understandable, but at the same time, at this point, I think it's more important to consider his feelings, as he's the more vulnerable one in this situation, so it seems. If you have some things you really want to ask, I would space them out a lot. Maybe once every few times you meet, without making a really big deal about it. Also, I would try and be vague about it. I've found that people will tell you as much as they want to tell you, if you ask. When you push, or ask specific questions, and things like that, some people can find it invasive, or rude, as holds true with any subject. And, I mean, this is just a generalized stance, that can be applied to any situation, but I feel it works particularly well for sensitive subjects.

    Additionally, I'm not trying to criticize you, or anything like that, but I think you might be thinking too far ahead. I understand the point of view of not bothering to date if there's no possibility of marriage, and things like that, but I wouldn't think too much about it. Whatever happens happens, and you'll cross those bridges when you come to them. For now, just have fun. Don't worry so much. Enjoy yourselves.

    And, I'm sorry, I have to ask, is this an AMWF relationship? If so, I seriously commend you, and wish you well!! XD We need more representation!! XD
    I told you never to interrupt me while I'm rich!

  4. #29
    New Member soimhappy's Avatar
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    I'm new to the forums but just wanted to say this story is really awesome. My heart skipped a beat while reading...thanks. <3

  5. #30
    New Member emoglassesenvy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hiro View Post
    I wouldn't rush him with questions. I think this holds true for just about anything exotic, especially something as personal as this, but the general tendency is that people usually aren't that fond of answering millions of questions about something that sets them apart, except, maybe, an area of study or expertise.
    at first questions just kind of spilled out, and i apologized but he actually said that it was totally alright, if there was anything he didn't want to answer then he'd say so. also, ftm kind of *is* his area of expertise, it's interesting to him and he has done a lot of research so he's actually happy that i ask questions instead of just "politely" ignoring it.

    though yeah, i'm trying not to just blurt stuff out. i wait until he brings up issues related to his transgenderism before i ask anything. and surprisingly to me, he brings it up more than i would have thought. i get the feeling that he likes that he can talk about his real feelings and real issues with me instead of hiding everything like before.


    And, I'm sorry, I have to ask, is this an AMWF relationship? If so, I seriously commend you, and wish you well!! XD We need more representation!! XD
    hah, indeed it is. you in one too?


    Quote Originally Posted by soimhappy View Post
    I'm new to the forums but just wanted to say this story is really awesome. My heart skipped a beat while reading...thanks. <3
    yay! i'm happy you're happy.. haha.

  6. #31
    New Member emoglassesenvy's Avatar
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    update!:

    my boyfriend and i have been dating for 2 and a half months now and things are awesome. i forgot how fun having a boyfriend is...

    he's answered any and every question i have had about his ftm-ness, even really personal questions that i was embarrassed to be asking. i also told him how i've been posting and reading these kinds of forums, and he was glad i could find some support.

    when i first posted here, i was properly freaked out and thought i was way in over my head... however, now i've come to understand a lot and i forget that he's ftm all of the time. like he'll start a conversation about some ftm or transsexual topic and i'll be like, "what? this is random, why are we talki... oh. yeah, he's TS.. " heh. he said sometime he forgets, too.

    i found some vlogs on youtube by girlfriends of transguys, and it made me want to start one, too. however, no one can ever know that my boyfriend is ts, so i'd have to do it on another account and hide my face, etc. hmm.

    also, i found out that my boyfriend actually made a website to share his experiences on living with GID and help other guys get information about coming out, binders, surgery, etc. it hasn't really been updated since he finished his transition but here's the link: http://94.xmbs.jp/sting/
    (warning: it's in japanese)


    emoglassesenvy & jin <3

  7. #32
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    Hi there emo,

    Im so glad you are happy and that you have managed to find a nice guy ...perhaps now everything is out in the open and you are in a relationship he would like to join here to make some friends too

  8. #33
    Leetle FtM WalT's Avatar
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    If he has been open and receptive to your questions, there is no need to be embarrassed at all. Like many others have pointed out, some people don't like being put under a microscope, but some will be glad to answer any questions you have (within reason). I shouldn't have to tell you some questions are a bit insulting ("What is your 'real' name?", etc.), so I've hoped you've avoided those.

    It really makes me happy to read there are people like you out there. The first person I came out as trans to was the person I was dating at the time (a cisgendered male who said he was cool with gay people. Obviously not TG/TS though!). Bad idea. He put me through so much verbal and psychological abuse over it that I havebeen hesitant to come out to anyone else I'm close with other than my current partner. But reading about you, who loves people for who they are, just warms my heart.

    I'm really glad things are working out for you and wish the best.

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