would you feel it is important to pave the way for social acceptance?

[emmicd]

As a closet crossdresser it seems difficult to further the cause for our fellow crossdressers. We live in fear and are not being true to ourselves. We have families we love and jobs we need to hold on to and careers we need to stay on track.

So when we dress in our private world we are content but we are not expressing a componet of ourselves that I feel most would wish for. For me I love womens clothes and I enjoy wearing dresses and I do get frustrated that I go shopping for dresses and undergarments that I need and love. The problem is I rarely get to wear them and never outside. After suffering a family tragedy I realize how life is so unpredictable and I realixe that if I want to wear a dress in the house I will and I am not going to worry about being seen anymore. My only reservation is my son who is a pre-teen. I just wish I could dress in public. I feel I am a closet crossdresser who would like to dress a lot more and I feel I am most definitely transgendered. I have to be a husband and father so SRS and hormones are out but when I was younger I did admit to wanting to have the full transition and would have loved to be transitioned full time to a woman. I took the test and I was considered a probable transexual but not as severe as the true transsexual. It is all so confusing to me. All I know is that I love shopping for and wearing pretty juniors and womens dresses and intimate lingerie.

I do love being associated as a girl and I love wearing girl's clothes!

emmi

[vivianann]

I believe that if more crossdressers would get over the hurdle of fear, and go out in public dressed as a woman, then society would get used to us and would not think twice about our choice in clothes. I am doing my part and am very successful in gaining public support, however I need to see more of my tg sisters helping me with the cause.

[AllieSF]

I think that from past experiences with many things that happen in life, more exposure seems to take the edge off of certain activities and ideas. Just like in marketing campaigns, what seemed strange, doesn't seem so strange after a lot of promotion and public viewing. Therefore, I believe that with more exposure in the real world, the "T" in the GLBT would become over time more acceptable to many more people. I think that to promote any idea, it takes all kinds of actions and participants. You have the flag wavers, parade marchers, write your government representative people all the way over to the great silent majority who will participate in their own way, including just by voting in favor of specific legislation. I am in the middle of all this. I do go out a lot, maybe close to 100 times in the last 2 1/2 years. I talk with whomever I meet, where ever I am while dressed, just as if I was not dressed en femme. I do not do this to "help the cause", but I do realize that what I am doing does help the cause, just like everyone else who take advantage of their limited opportunities to get out dressed.

[noeleena]

Hi..
Well some of us are out there . may be not like you . as one who dresses part time . dont ever give up . if you are one who sees your self as living full time then have a think about this .
I m 62 . been living as a woman for 11 years . the first part of that was male & female dress . i m a builder . so did do building work . as a male (( i have done for over 45 years . )) so just carryed on .oh i still do buiding work as a female . 5 years ago i came out to our kids . Jos knew 11 years ago . & from then on every one knew well most of our friends . about three years ago . i was out full time . s r s & b a .
If you accept your self for who you are . then you ll find many others . will as well . i am involoved with a good number of womens groups now & that took over 2 years .
i told our friends what i was doing . then just said the next time you see me it ll be as a woman .....so in the main i have been acepted . of cause there is more to it than this . this just gives you an idear . invite others to be a part of your life . dont hide it .
oh you may loes some well like i did you ll find your true friends & then some . i have more friends now than before. be out going . even if your not . talk with others . like friends . dont think the world & people are against you some may be . so move on . .
the part that i did . you wont .....
i went on two t v stations. in the papers & on the net . that helped me in many ways . i was asked to speak at some groups concerning my self as a woman . & what its like with the change . family & others .
I m saying this because if you knew me before i came out you would see the changes in me . not the looks . just me as a person . i never thought i would be accepted like i have been that was my biggest concern . now . people dont care . its lets just get on & do things go places & enjoy others along the way . now i meet 1000 s of people . before . it was . a . no way . you dont have to prove who you are . you just go out get help with make up clothes what ever you need . have fun .............. there is no fear only the fear you make ...........
your son let him see the real you . now that may be hard ........ i know ..... we have 2 two accept & just get on with me hard yes . our other hmmm may be not well not yet any way .. 6 gand kids . dont care . to them i m just me a woman yet still thier grand dad .
If we put blooks in front of us then yes it ll be harder . my advise is . be you. it may not be next week next year.. just dont leave it to long or you ll regret it .i look forward . not back . how you deal with others . may be not the way i did . yet youll find it . all the best .
...noeleena

[AndroRemi]

While it is certainly something to dream about, I don't see the crossdressing community rising up and making their presence known any time soon. I think that the only real way that the crossdressing community is going to get more into the public eye is with the assistance of the homosexual community because there are many of us that are also part of them (not just homosexuals, the Gay Rights Movement also includes transgender people), and the gay community is rising in power just as the Women's Rights Movement did. Without their assistance, I honestly think it will be a decade or two before we've grouped together, become organized enough, and have enough influential members to make national headlines. The bird will learn to fly, but it would fly a lot faster if it was nudged out of the nest by the elder communities.

[Kate Simmons]

The bottom line is that total solidarity is never going to be achieved for various and sundry reasons such as you mentioned. It's just the nature of the beast. The best thing to do is take the plunge personally and work on our own acceptance by others as a person by showing who we are and our values and removing the gender stuff from the equation. No one said that would be easy but it is more satisfying and longer lasting.

[sterling12]

Of course going out, and being seen is up to The Individual. But for EACH Gurl that does go out, we get just a little bit closer to achieving acceptance and tolerance.

There is a "Tipping Point," when if enough of us take The Risk; it will suddenly become acceptable for the vast majority of Gurls who were too timid to ever be seen out of The House, to suddenly find it becoming an "In thing" to do. I just don't know when that magic moment will occur! But, it happened in The Gay Communities, and it will eventually happen for us.

And that's why it is important for individuals to network, join groups, be involved politically. I think we have currently reached a point where MOST people know who we are, and they are NOT antagonistic! I think that for now and in the near future, we need to keep increasing awareness and public acceptance.

Do I think it's important for each Gurl to get out there and "make it happen?" Of course I do! I did it about five years ago, and it's been a marvelous adventure. I would wish and pray that all others did the same, it's well worth "The Sacrifice!"

Actually, I think there's not much of a sacrifice to be made. The Problem is overcoming our own fears.

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Ellen James]

While waiting for the strength of character to go out (and to learn how to better present my feminine side in public) I am supporting groups like The Human Rights Campaign. Once people get beyond thinking of sexuality as a basis for discrimination, I think it will be better for all of us including us gurls.

[Ronni Seymour]

Emmi, the fear we have of being exposed lessens the more we improve our presentation and get out there. When I first started going out I was nervous, to say the least. And I was always worried about what others thought. Now that I have gotten out quite a bit over the last two years, and improved my presentation, I have become much more confident and the pararnoia is nonexistent. Probably my age, but I'm becoming less concerned about what others think. Besides, when I go out people treat me as a woman, even when I know they read me.
I'm not doing anything immoral, criminal, unethical, hurtful, hateful, etc. (Get the picture??) We can't let such fear control the discoveries of ourselves.
Now, I realize each of us have vastly different life circumstances, and we must take into account how we will handle our particulars. For some, exposure could mean loss of family, employment, etc. I do understand one has to be mindful of the negative consequences and make their choices accordingly. I'm not pressing for wrecklessness. We are so culturally conditioned that a man presenting as a woman just throws a lot of people for a loop. Especially those closest to us. It takes some time for family and friends to wrap their minds around a new US. Sometimes they never can. It's unfortunate, but that's the way it is.
Emmi dear, I do hope you can eventually work through your circumstances
and come to a place of contentment, in whatever degree you can express your femininity.

[TxKimberly]

For me, I settle on trying to give people a decent impression of me when I am out and about. So I don't exactly head out with the intent of furthering our cause, but I try to make sure that those who meet me think reasonably well of cross dressers.

[Lainie]

Absolutely we all need to set a welcoming standard for diversity. I want Treansgenders to be accepted, partly for selfish reasons, but mostly because everyone deserves to be accepted, as long as they are not harming others. For me, as for many of us, acceptance of Ts in the greater society is encouraging, but what really matters is our relations with friends & family. I just adore wearing skirts--I'm sitting in a hotel bar now in one--but Ilm not sure I want my wife & others to change our relationships so that CDing dominates other roles.