Please forgive me I advance if I over generalize. I have been pondering this question for some time now and I would like to see your thoughts on it as well. All are welcome to answer but I really would like to see some GG responses as I think they are uniquely able to answer the question.
Over Generalization No. 1- Most TG’s tend to glamorize what it would be like to be their chosen gender. The thought process seems to be, “I’ll spend my days dressed to the nines, my makeup will always look perfect, men will desire me and women will envy me.” The day-to-day reality, at least as I understand it, is far from this. I base this conclusion on my own observations of over 60 years and over 40 years of that living with my wife. While by society’s standards she may not be a fashion model, to me she has been and always will be the most beautiful woman in the world. But I assure you, she is not always dressed to impress. Oh, her clothing is always appropriate, clean, in proper repair and so forth. And her life is far from one of leisure. She’s raised three kids, worked most of her life in unglamorous jobs, kept house, shopped for the family, and at one time ran her own children’s clothing business. All of this was done without complaint. Add to all of this, helping with homework, going to the kids school functions, sports activities, drama presentations, accompanying me to social functions to help further my career, etc. What I get out of all this is that she found her fulfillment from within. Her giving to others contributed to her own self-worth and self-value.
Overgeneralization No. 2- Most men find their fulfillment in defeating others. Mine’s bigger than yours. Mine is faster than yours. I have more than you. Isn’t that the essence of sports? Pitting oneself self against another with the express purpose of beating them? Competing in the workplace for superiority? Why is that? And why does success have to come at the expense of someone else’s failure? Get out of my way or I’ll run you over. Women, on the other hand, seem to find their success from within; contributing to the family welfare, keeping a warm and inviting environment for the husband and children, helping a neighbor or friend, contributing to the success of everyone around them. Even the Woman’s Revolution of the 70’s was not about being superior to men but becoming equal partners with them, asking for respect, value, and recognition for the contributions they were bring to the table.
Conclusions (for me)- Being a woman starts with being at peace with yourself; being satisfied with who you are but not necessarily complacent. Realizing that there is always room to grow, not at other people’s expense, but for their betterment as well. Women are unselfish givers of compliments and praise with no alternative notion of getting something in return. Even the act of putting on makeup is one of balancing the outside with the inside, so that others will find them approachable and welcoming. The creams and lotions she uses to pamper the skin show that she cares enough about herself to care about you as well. Women lift others up, not put them down. They find their success in helping others achieve their successes. She looks at herself for who she is, not who she beat.
So where does the clothing fit in all this? It certainly doesn’t “make” one a woman simply by wearing it. For me, it establishes an identity. It publicly shows others the values I embrace for myself. For me, I’m more comfortable in a skirt and blouse than I ever was in slacks and a dress shirt. The clothes and makeup strike a cord within that is very pleasant to me. Everything seems harmonious… but that’s me. But I’m content wearing just about anything. It’s really a state of mind. Maybe for you it is a physical sensation, and that’s fine. Maybe there are confusing thoughts’ going on inside and this is your way of exploring, and that’s good as well.
Summing it up- Being a woman is not about what she wears or what she’s accomplished. It’s about who she believes herself to be. She can be equally at ease in the workplace or in her home. She has nothing to prove to anyone but herself. She finds real joy in the accomplishment of those around her and has no need to compete with them. She is greatly rewarded in being recognized for what she has helped others to attain. She cherishes unsolicited compliments. She finds happiness in herself.
So how far off the mark am I? Am I far a field? Do I not “get it?” Am I close?
Originally Posted by maryklinden
