Except for a rare few, EVERY CD GIRL , ( that's thousands here, maybe millions world wide!), at one time or another, has experienced what you described!
I'm over 60, and STILL finish all my dressing sessions that way! And many others here do, too!
After 2 years here, I've received so many messages about how CDing is a part of us. That it is a harmless activity that hurts no one! And that the WORST thing we can do, is DENY what we r!
I must say the messages r working on me! I still have some guilt. But, it's NOT NEARLY as bad as what I suffered 2 years ago!
Just be yourself, Ash. And CD when u feel like it! Maybe one day you'll dress GUILT FREE! That's my hope for ALL OF US!