Great thread and discussion -- thanks to all for sharing so openly.

CDing for me has always been a very erotic experience and foremost in my sexual desires. I'm almost 50 now and went a long time without intercourse, as for most of my 30's and part of my 40's crossdressing WAS my sex life. I did other things ith girlfriends but intercourse represented too much pressure and not enough pleasure.

I'm now in a great relationship with a wonderful woman who knows all about my femme side and is still coming to terms with it. But we've had a great sex life -- the best ever for me and I think her, too.

One reason is that intercourse isn't super important to her and although we do it, we both get much more pleasure from oral and touching. We have very long sexual sessions that are intensely satisfying.

But a big part of it is that she also knows about my crossdressing and has already accepted it at some level. While I've integrated CDing and sex in the past, I'm not quite sure I even want to do that in this case. For one thing, I do it much less now, so rather I rely on past experiences and extrapolation for my fantasies.

I actually think she is going to come around and be quite accepting. I've come out to partners many times in the past and there is always an initial shock but I can usually tell when they'll get past that. And I'm very optimistic here.

But, I'm not sure I want to fully dress with her even if she turns out to be quite enthusiastic. I want to make sure that she is enjoying our sexual time together. She described a very selfish lover in her recent past and objectively I could see how lousy that would be. I don't want to be that guy.

Knowing that she knows is a big turn-on in itself. She was extremely complimentary when I showed her photos, and in a very honest, observational way -- not in a trying-to-be-nice way. Her comments alone are very exciting to me.


I'll just say that finding the right person with similar sexual interests in general has proven to be the most important thing. Frankly, I'd strongly prefer to be my naked self with her in bed than to dress up.