Got Caught Looking

[AKAMichelle]

The other day my wife and I went to grab a bite in the middle of shopping, and I kept looking at this other woman. In my younger days, I would have been as guilty as sin of everything I was accused of. Not this time. I was interested in her purse, tops and shoes. She was very well put together and looked very nice. I kept looking to see how it all went together.

Now I did all of this with frequent short bursts instead of the obvious stare. It didn't matter my wife only asked if I wanted an introduction. Ouch! I know I was looking too hard, but I just couldn't help myself. Her clothes were gorgeous and I wished I had them. I wished even more that I could look that good in them. Luckily I talked my way out of this by claiming that I was looking at the baby at the table. Small white lie.

It is truly sad because I must really be old since I was only looking at her outfit.

[SuzanneBender]

I do that all the time. Women always look at each others outfits.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Michelle

That's like buying Playboy just for the stories.

Orchid

[Joni Marie Cruz]

Hi Michelle-

I so get it. Used to be I looked at women for the usual T&A reasons. Now instead of wanting to get in their pants I wonder where they got them. I'm always checking them out for what they're wearing and for mannerisms and so on. Most of time it's, "I wonder how she did her eyes? What a great look." but sadly, sometimes it's, "OMG, the poor thing, she can't afford a mirror." Yes, I know, I'm a b*tch.

Hugs...Joni Mari

[EnglishRose]

Yeah, I've told my wife that I look at other women...'s clothes

Been inspired lately by some people on TV... Bree Hodge from Desparate Housewives, Kalinda on The Good Wife, and Elisabeth on the View had a gorgeous outfit on this last Thursday.

[Anita Lynn]

Hi Michelle-

I so get it. Used to be I looked at women for the usual T&A reasons. Now instead of wanting to get in their pants I wonder where they got them.

Hugs...Joni Mari

I still want to get into them, but they are usually much to small for me (the pants, that is!)

Melissa

[Renee_E]

I always check out what other women are wearing. Sometimes I even commment to my wife. The only problem is my wife is never sure when I like something if its for her or me. Of course she loves it when I make catty remarks about how other women dress.

[PetiteDuality]

Crossdressing has its complications:

Scenario 1) CD with supportive wife, caught staring at a gorgeous woman:
"Honey, I swear, I was not checking her bun, just looking het outfit"

Scenario 2) CD with unsupportive wife:
"Honey, I swear, I was not looking her outfit, just checking her bun"

[DAVIDA]

Listen, I am so blessed when it comes to wives! Jean will point a woman out to me if she thinks that I haven't seen her yet!
She knows that I love all women, but she also knows that she is the ONLY one for me.

If I were to quit looking, she would be worried.

[Tamara Croft]

Do you know how hurtful it is when you catch your guy looking at another woman? Whether you are looking at the clothes or not, you're taking your focus off your wife and paying more attention to another woman, it's hurtful. How do I know? because Tam often does it to me, and does it hurt? Yes it bloody does hurt, especially when he's staring and taking another look at some woman who would look good in a bin liner.... It slaps a womans ego in the face, have some respect for your wife when you are out fgs.. it's not always about bloody clothes!!

[ChanDelle]

My wife knows that when I quit looking at other women, bury me! Life is over. She knows I love women but her above all. Sorry to paraphrase you, DAVIDA, but what you said really nailed us too. And I, too, know when she stops admiring good looking men, something's really gone wrong.

ChanDelle

[SouthernBelle.GG]

I guarantee your wife knew you were lying. We're not stupid you know.

Hubby claims to be checking out the clothing too, but it still doesn't make me feel any better when we finally get a chance to go out alone and I'm fighting for his attention. I mean really. Why the little sideways glances every 30 seconds? Why not let me in on what he's so fascinated by? At least that way I still feel like he's there with me.

[Sandra]

Well yet again another wife whos been lied to Do you really think that she didn't know that you were lying to her?


Tam is right it is hurtful...but then as usual most cders are only thinking about themselves.

[PetiteDuality]

Hey, cool down...

Although we are crossdressers, we are guys too!

We guys are visual. Sometimes, looking at women is not on purpose. It's a reflex.

Believe me, I'm 100% faithful to my wife. Sometimes I catch myself looking at other women, and when I notice what I'm doing I just stop it. And when I do stare at a woman it's mainly at her shoes

I haven't been caught because when I'm with my wife I'm focused on her and it rarely happens, but if she catches me it wouldn't be that bad because it would only be a casual look, not a "harassment stare" (like many men do).

And I think that my wife is so self confident that she wouldn't feel bad. She'd probably think "dumb guy as always", and call my attention to let me know she noticed. Hey, but that's just her...

as usual most cders are only thinking about themselves.

Wow, nice thing to say from a crossdressing site moderator... Although I totally agree with you. And I know because I'm a crossdresser that has curbed his crossdressing after noticing too much selfishness.

[Dee2U]

Selfishness only begins when it takes away from someone else. If you were being in attentive to her while noticing the other woman's style, then yes it is selfish. If not, you were just out and about. I am always checking out what women are wearing, especially skirts / dresses; shoes and bags (love bags!). I dont think it is any big deal. Also - if politely done yet noticed, it can be subtlely flattering. Many dress well just to be noticed....Dee

[Sandra]

Wow, nice thing to say from a crossdressing site moderator... Although I totally agree with you. And I know because I'm a crossdresser that has curbed his crossdressing after noticing too much selfishness.

Excuse me but I am a member here just like you and have every right to make a comment, don't pull the moderator bit on me.

[SouthernBelle.GG]

...And I think that my wife is so self confident that she wouldn't feel bad...

Hmmmm, I'm not lacking in self confidence myself believe me. I was trying to let some people know how it feels on the flip side sometimes. I know men look for whatever number of reasons. Hell, I look at nice looking men and women too. Human nature. My hubby is out to me and I'm fully accepting. I just wished he'd let me in on what his thoughts are when he's stealing glances. I've tried to ask and hold a conversation, but he won't say much more than liking the ladies blouse or skirt, etc. It's frustrating.

So, it's not always a case of low self confidence or jealousy. We want to know your thoughts. We want in.

[PetiteDuality]

Hmmmm, I'm not lacking in self confidence myself believe me. I was trying to let some people know how it feels on the flip side sometimes. I know men look for whatever number of reasons. Hell, I look at nice looking men and women too. Human nature. My hubby is out to me and I'm fully accepting. I just wished he'd let me in on what his thoughts are when he's stealing glances. I've tried to ask and hold a conversation, but he won't say much more than liking the ladies blouse or skirt, etc. It's frustrating.

So, it's not always a case of low self confidence or jealousy. We want to know your thoughts. We want in.

You're right. I think my wife wouldn't feel bad because of her self confidence plus her knowledge that I wouldn't cheat on her. As I mentioned, she would never catch me giving a wolf stare to a girls because I don't do that.

Excuse me but I am a member here just like you and have every right to make a comment, don't pull the moderator bit on me.

Sandra: It's true. You have all the right to make a comment. I have not denied that (have I?). But so I do. And I could not help noticing you are a moderator because it's in your signature.

[KimberlyJo]

I agree with the GGs, shame on you disrespectful men. Keep your eyes on your wife or SO where they belong!



but daaaaaaaamn, those are nice shoes!

[Erica2Sweet]

My SO and I do make a point to acknowledge well dressed women, and we tend to look together and comment on what it is we like about how she presents herself. She and I are people-watchers by nature. She's commented that she knows I'm not interested in any sort of intimacy with some other woman regardless of the circumstances (and she's right), so we get to enjoy this particular activity together.

She once told me (soon after we met) that there was a bit of getting used to it, since her ex was a lying horn-dog. But she can read my reactions and she knows its a learning thing for me more than anything.

Having the SO in-the-know often times seems to head off the hurt feelings regarding a lot of things. Good, honest communication really is key. Your experience may vary.

[lavistaa62]

I totally check out how GG apply their makeup- what look they were going for, how the colors blend and so on. Odd, before I started using makeup myself I never paid any attention!

[Erica2Sweet]

...but then as usual most cders are only thinking about themselves...

That's no more accurate than stating "most wives are bitchy".

Why perpetuate negative stereotypes? What motivates you to insult a group of people many of whom you've never met in your life?

[2b.Lauren]

Well yet again another wife whos been lied to Do you really think that she didn't know that you were lying to her?


Tam is right it is hurtful...but then as usual most cders are only thinking about themselves.

The use of the word most at least prevents that from being a sweeping generalization. But "If it doesn't apply let it fly"

[sherri52]

When your out with your wife you have to restrain yourself. Like the klondike bar commercial when a beautiful woman walks by keep your attention on the wife. You will be grateful for it later and possibly rewarded. Your wife deserves your attention, there will be plenty of other opportunities to check out the (clothes) when she is not with you.

[Sandra]

Well it seems I've ruffled some feathers

Sandra: It's true. You have all the right to make a comment. I have not denied that (have I?). But so I do. And I could not help noticing you are a moderator because it's in your signature

Hun your post still comes across with the view that because I'm a moderator I shouldn't make comments like the one I did.

What motivates you to insult a group of people many of whom you've never met in your life?

I was not insulting anyone, just making a comment, but if you really must know, after talking to wives/partners in all the 22 years I have been in the "community", I stand by what I have said, hell even in the begining my SO was selfish.