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Thread: Is it possible to be attractive if not passable?

  1. #1
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    Is it possible to be attractive if not passable?

    I have to admit, I was looking at myself in the mirror after putting on make up, and I though - not bad for an old broad. I've got nice eyes, a SA told me recently, even w/o mascara or eye shadow... high cheekbones...not bad. But it would be quite an undertaking to disguise my gender .

    So what do you think - can a CDer possibly be attractive even if I can't pass? I suppose its all in the eye of the beholder.

  2. #2
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    Nothing wrong with being a pretty guy Hon. Nothing at all.
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  3. #3
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    Yes, it's possible.

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    Clear Air Turbulence Joni Marie Cruz's Avatar
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    Yes. I even think lots of ggirls can be attractive, too.

    Hugs...Joni Mari


    Quote Originally Posted by kimdl93 View Post
    So what do you think - can a CDer possibly be attractive even if I can't pass? I suppose its all in the eye of the beholder.
    "Because equality is not a concept. It's not something we should be striving for. It's a necessity. Equality is like gravity. We need it to stand on this earth as men and women. And the misogyny that is in every culture is not a true part of the human condition. It is life out of balance, and that imbalance is sucking something out of the soul of every man and woman who's confronted with it."

    --Joss Whedon, to a reporter who asked, "So why do you create these strong women characters?"

  5. #5
    Time Lady JiveTurkeyOnRye's Avatar
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    Of course! I'm a broken record with this but I even think many of us, myself included look better looking as happy crossdressers than when we try to pass. Plenty of folks pass and look dynamite but not all of us are so lucky.

    Edit: remember too that the most attractive feature is confidence
    Last edited by JiveTurkeyOnRye; 02-05-2010 at 01:19 PM.
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  6. #6
    Silver Member Teri Jean's Avatar
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    Of course you can, if I can you can to. Beside the real beauty is on the inside not the outside.

    Huggs Teri

  7. #7
    Senior Member charlie's Avatar
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    I think that people on the street are not really looking at us to see if we are CD's, they are just going about their business. People tend to look at you and fill in the pieces that do not match. They see what they expect to see. As long as you are reasonably dressed and displaying what is expected to be seen on the street (micro mini skirts, garters showing and 6" platforms in red is not what people expect to see), you really do pass to most people.
    Charlie

  8. #8
    My destiny is before me Brandi Wyne's Avatar
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    In or out?

    Quote Originally Posted by Teri Jean View Post
    Of course you can, if I can you can to. Beside the real beauty is on the inside not the outside.

    Huggs Teri
    Maybe, but we strive for getting the outside all dolled up for others to see and , hopefully, like what they DO see.
    [SIZE="3"]Brandi[/SIZE]
    Love life and find happiness where you can.

  9. #9
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    That is, in fact, my goal. Although I pass sometimes to some people, i never pass all the time to all people. However, I do want to always leave the impression that I care about how I look and have at least a modicum of style sense!

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    Quote Originally Posted by ReneeT View Post
    That is, in fact, my goal. Although I pass sometimes to some people, i never pass all the time to all people. However, I do want to always leave the impression that I care about how I look and have at least a modicum of style sense!
    I think that's a great attitude Renee!

  11. #11
    The Anima Corrupt Wen4cd's Avatar
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    I've been told I am attractive, but I am certainly nothing close to 'passable.'

    If you search your own (personal) archetypes of what has deep meaning to you, and be as honest with yourself as possible, you will probably find an image that represents both you, and what you feel is beautiful, at the same time. Then the idea of passing isn't so important, because you have found yourself.

    And if you see parts of you mother in there, don't fret, that means you're doing it right.
    And so we go, on with our lives...
    We know the Truth, but prefer Lies.
    Lies are simple, simple is Bliss.
    Why go against tradition, when we can admit defeat,
    Live in Decline, be the victim of our own design?

  12. #12
    Aspiring Member msniki48's Avatar
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    Kim

    Of course it is possible. if you look at most of the girls here in the forum.

    the largest percentage look wonderful, pretty , glamorous, natural...or all of the above....but yet...that percentage drops dramatically for who can truly pass under any scrutiny.

    yes you can look pretty, and i'm sure you do.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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  13. #13
    The best of both worlds Kathi Lake's Avatar
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    I think Renee has said it best so far. Am I passable? I don't think so. Am I attractive? People have said so, so I will defer to their judgement.

    Like Renee, I strive to be the best I can be - hair, clothing, makeup, deportment - and I think it shows.

    Kathi

  14. #14
    Full-Time Duality NathalieX66's Avatar
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    There are attractive TG's, and there are attractive women. I'm happy to leave it at that. I think it's possible to have attractive feminine features and yet not look so literally genetically female, though we all try so hard in vain to achieve this.

    Beauty vs. realistic-ness.....think about it.

  15. #15
    Senior Member Deidra Cowen's Avatar
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    Absolutely I see it all the time. They dont' know makeup well enough, or wear wild outfits, wigs that prevent passing. But natural androgenous facial features make them pretty CDs. For that matter pretty guys too. For example Johnny Depp in even in his forties would make for a pretty CD.

  16. #16
    Silver Member Loni's Avatar
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    Smile

    well i must say yes.

    not into the big and bold. but i have seen some of the larger gg looking very good.
    and if they can look that good to me...then i should be able to make my self look good.

    there is a lot more than just having a pretty face it includs the whole look and how you feel about your self.
    as in confendence, that is a must, how you hold your self, your walk, the types of clothing you have on, etc.

    .

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    Quote Originally Posted by Loni View Post
    well i must say yes.

    not into the big and bold. but i have seen some of the larger gg looking very good.
    and if they can look that good to me...then i should be able to make my self look good.

    there is a lot more than just having a pretty face it includs the whole look and how you feel about your self.
    as in confendence, that is a must, how you hold your self, your walk, the types of clothing you have on, etc.

    .
    Good points - I do tend to look at the GG plus sized models for inspiration and encouragement, as well as a sense of what is proportionate for a taller person.

  18. #18
    Pausing To Femme-flect melissacd's Avatar
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    Once you get past the whole nonsensical notion of passing then the answer is yes. You need to learn how to do what women do and accentuate your positive features and as Ryan stated, the best feature to have is confidence. Confidence will take you a long long way. Then passing becomes passe and the adventure becomes about just being yourself and expressing that in whatever way makes you happy.

    Melissa
    Last edited by melissacd; 02-06-2010 at 03:51 PM.
    What stop do I get off at? Hmmm...

  19. #19
    Inner Princess Mandy Burgundy's Avatar
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    Oh yea, absolutely.
    "Don't hate, epilate"[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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    Junior Member jennyscott's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ReneeT View Post
    That is, in fact, my goal. Although I pass sometimes to some people, i never pass all the time to all people. However, I do want to always leave the impression that I care about how I look and have at least a modicum of style sense!
    I also have to agree with Renee. It reminds me of attempting to speak German in Germany to locals. Once they see you try, they open up and start speaking English to you, lol. After all they want to practice too. I think as long as we can avoid the "call girl" look and dress appropriately for the occasion the outcome would normally be positive, neutral at the worst.

  21. #21
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    Is it possible.....

    Hi Kim,
    People are always concerned about passing. I hate that term.I am 52 and 6' 6" in heels. I know I don't make a terribly attractive woman, but I do PRESENT well. Make up, mannorisms, attitude. When I am out and about because what people see is what I Present I am always, At least so far, treated like a lady, doors held for me, referred to as Mam, had people buy me drinks, etc.
    So yes it is possible to be attractive But if you do not PRESENT the entire image than you will be made every time.

    Stop thinking about passing and start tihinking presentation.
    Hugs Phyliss.

  22. #22
    I like to be pretty Joanne Curl's Avatar
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    Passing is over rated! I know I'm a fat old guy and when I'm Joanne I'm a old fat cross dresser. However when I'm out as Joanne I always try to look my best and act like a lady. I'm sure people know I'm not a GG but I try to fit in and act like the woman that's inside of me. I'm not hurting anyone and I've never had a problem. My biggest problem is my own self confidence.
    Joanne

  23. #23
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    I see GG women everyday that would be happy with passable too...and certainly wish they could be as pretty as you are Joanne.

  24. #24
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    I think it is totally posible. It sometimes looks a bit wierd, because we are so used to seeing woman's styles on woman. However, I have seen some guys who look like guys, yet work very well in their girly clothes.

  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by kiralove View Post
    I think it is totally posible. It sometimes looks a bit wierd, because we are so used to seeing woman's styles on woman. However, I have seen some guys who look like guys, yet work very well in their girly clothes.
    The more I think about this, the more I agree with you. Not just the clothes but even some make up. I think a lot of guys look good with a little eye make up...androgynous, but sexy.

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