How committed are you?

[Sarah Doepner]

I realize this is a pretty select group and any summary of responses will not be science, but I am curious.

How strong is your committment to your self-identification as a crossdresser? Are you about to enter a program to end all this and do a final purge, or are you serious about moving toward transition? Who among us feel comfortable and don't really have much in the way of self doubt, satisfied they are a crossdresser and are happy to remain one?

For the record, I'm a crossdresser and don't want to purge and I don't want to transition. I'm comfortable where I am and have been for several years. Just lucky I guess. What about the rest of you?

[Amanda Katharine]

I'm a man who simply likes to wear women's clothes and occasionally makeup. I enjoy being a guy too much to transition from MTF.

[RobynBella]

I'm a crossdresser and happy with it. I would like to be more feminine, even in boy mode. And having breasts would be great... So yeah... Idk. If I did ever feel I wanted to go fulltime... I'm still pretty committed to my boy parts...

[Tina2]

I think I would give up the desire to crossdress if I could.

But I don't think that is possible and repressing it isn't an option.

[Jilmac]

I'm with you Sarah. Save for about eight years of experimentation, I've been dressing for almost 50 years. In the past, I had many doubts, much anxiety, and went through umpteen purges. I came out to the world and myself in 2007 and will never go back in the closet. I don't have any intention of transitioning, I'm happy with my male and female personnas and it's the best of both worlds.

[marlacd]

I am a crossdresser, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Now, in my line of work its not advisable to come out to everyone. But, I still am what I am. And I'm not going to worry about it.

[weyburn]

if I were 25 yrs.younger would probably go all the way........Andrea

[eluuzion]

I am not the type of personality to allow things to build up to a point of causing personal conflict and crisis.

Unresolved issues will ruin your physical and mental health like a cancer. I quickly recognize those things which have potential to cause the wheels to fall off the cart if not addressed. I make a mental list of all the options to resolve conflict, and pick the most productive option, and move forward.

My CDing is enjoyable. It does not negatively impact my ability to carry out all of my regular responsibilites effectively, or cause any mental conflict. So, I'm happy doing what I am doing now...whatever that is...lol

[boy2girl31]

If I had the money I would transition in a heartbeat. I have wanted to be female for almost 20 yrs. Though as I get older the desire fades as I want to be as sexy and attractive as possible. I am almost 33 now but would still transition if I could.

[Persephone]

I'm so committed that I'm continually surprised that I haven't been, uh, committed, as in committed to an institution!

It was a Hell of a lot of years and a Hell of a lot of pain before I realized that I had better accept who I am and live in my own skin.

I finally figured out that I've been given a tremendous number of blessings in my life, an incredible spouse, a wonderful son, a physical body that has, so far, held up very well, lots of love and happiness, many friends, an incredible lifestyle, a beautiful country to live and travel in, and the gift of being a crossdresser with far more insight than the muggles ever get, and it is up to me to take these miraculous blessings and to enjoy them, living life to the fullest and helping others.

As Popeye said, "I yam what I yam and that's all that I yam."

[gabimartini]

Though I've been CDing since childhood, I'm still finding my bearings. My true acceptance process began just 2 years ago, in which I learned more about me than in the previous 30. Today I can say that I'm ok and no longer hold a grudge for being gender-gifted.

Nonetheless, I'm still struggling to find that measure of balance between male and female. While at the peak of my pink fogs, I think there's no other way for me but to transition. However, when I'm out of the fog, I like being a guy, too, and I wouldn't dream or HRT and SRS.

As the self-discovery process continues, I guess that with time I'll just settle and stick to CDing only.

[ChainedJane]

I'm really just getting started on my journey into CD, but I've thought about transition a lot in the past, and while I would love to spend a day (or even a week) as a physical, anatomical woman, I don't think I could give up my male entity. I like dressing, and there are parts of my personality that are definitely female, but I'm also a man and get entirely too much joy and satisfaction from my man parts. I guess I'd say I'm committed enough to want to be a woman, but only if I could flip a switch and be a man too on occasion, if that makes any sense!

[Jocelyn Quivers]

For the record Cross Dresser. Which I am totally committed towards developing and improving my femme appearance, persona etc. In other words I'm totally committed to the cause. While still being in the closet though of course.

[Raychel]

I am a crossdresser too, Very comfortible where I am, Have absolutely NO desire to transition, and even less desire to purge. This is me, get used to it world.

[PretzelGirl]

Well, I haven't tried to purge once and don't plan on it. As far as "trans"ition (funny how these words are put together), it isn't even on my radar. I am happy where I am at as a crossdressing male and I love my family life and professional life.

Now drilling down a little further, there is some exploring to do. How much do I want to go out? Will I eventually travel en femme? How open do I get as I go along? etc... I know the answers to your general questions, but the specifics are developing as life unfolds.

And I also want to recognize that sometimes our feelings change. A number of the transitioned individuals on this board have stated that they didn't see themselves heading down that road before. So, an open mind is a good thing or else it can cause personal demons later as a person tried to reconcile changing feelings.

[Ashley S]

I've very recently admitted to myself that I am a crossdresser, and so I'm not entirely sure yet what I want from it and how I want it integrate it into my life.

Like others have said above, I think I've accepted that it's part of who I am, and always has been. I don't feel that my identity is feminine, but I do have fem aspects of my body and personality.

I'm almost positive I don't want to transition, I'm just a guy who needs to feel girly sometimes.

[sherri52]

I am a crossdresser and although I dress more fem than I do male, I have no plans on transitioning. Most people that know me know either I dress or I'm a little feminine, includung those that want me for my muscles. I like being a man but like being a woman more. I wouldn't mind be a female for a time but I might miss being man. Not the most glorious thinking but as a hetero male it's how I think.

[Jennifer in CO]

having been there done that would I go back? I wish I could but know I can't.
Since I had just turned 14 (1971) when I started on t blocker (kidney med) testosterone had not wracked my body with masculine traits. That allowed for a near blank slate for when I transitioned back in 1979. Although tall at 6ft I was very feminine looking with a 32c breasts, 27 inch waist and 33 inch hips on a 135 pound frame with long, thick black hair by the time I was done taking hormones and taken off the kidney med almost 3 years later. Even when I transitioned back in 84/85 I still looked more feminine than masculine. I feel I know full well what a Trans-man feels like early on in their transition doing everything they can to look like a guy.
Well, I don't look like that now.
Age, testosterone being turned back on, steroids, and a plethora of other things have destroyed that girl. She is still 6ft+ but 220 pounds, pudgy and just not a pretty site. On top of the visual (which I know doesn't really matter), I have to say that more importantly, I'm not mentally a girl anymore. I honestly think that has more to do with it than anything else. If you feel like a woman, if you think like a woman, your are one no matter what you look like. Maybe that is why I have clung to the clothes all these years is I still really want to feel and think like one and wearing the clothes hopefully will help me hold to that dream. Ok the clothes do for the most part still fit me better, and they are far more comfy than anything from the guys dept but we digress...
I guess can you be begrudgingly happy your a guy?

Jenn

[Bunny Girl Zoe]

After I accepted myself for who I am then I am very happy being a crossdresser and would be more than happy to live life as female as my feelings are so strong but I don't think I consider srs or hrt as happy with my body just have stronger feelings of a female but still only fancy females if that makes sence.

[Mary Morgan]

I am at peace with my transgender nature, and it does change from time to time. At present, I am satisfied that I will always wear the clothes of my true gender, but I am also a realist and doubt that I will ever transition. I love my wife very much and she would not stay around. I am grateful for what I have and I truly enjoy it.

[Cassandra]

I am serious about moving toward transition. I'm a woman 100% of the time now and I love it.

[Alaceann]

I'm happy with my male side and do not want to lose it but I love the girl in me and would love to get hormones to develop nice breast but not transition, I love my wife to much to lose her.

[mklinden2010]

Interesting question.

I guess it's really asking, "How much do you "get it" about yourself and how much do you support yourself in being who you are and doing what you want to do?"

"Know thyself" is a wise precept. Cding has informed me about society, human nature, and so many other things. And, as the question implies, it's not what you say in life so much as it is what you do.

To be honest with myself, I had to make allowances for other people being who they are and pursuing their own happiness.

So, I'm committed to that notion and act on it daily.

People seem to like it too.

"It" works; I'm sticking with it.

[Nikki A.]

I'm more committed than ever, to a point where I I know this is a part of me. Would I tansition if I could? Maybe if I was younger and better looking LOL. That said I am not uncomfortable being out in public dressed as long as it does not affect my family or career. Therefore I dress when away from home or only in certain places near home.

[StarrOfDelite]

I'm happy with my status quo. I work in fairly casual surroundings, long hours and fairly well paid, and can wear easy to take care of male clothing (jeans, tweed jackets, loafers/sneakers) without worrying about makeup, runs in my stockings, or a five o' clock shadow. So I have to admit that it's much easier to be a man in the workplace, and I don't want to change that at all. When I'm home and want to express my feminine side, I can do all the prepping and primping, and either just be happy about my duality home alone, or call some friends and try to organize a soiree. Or, if I'm tired I can just take a shower, make myself a martini, pull on some sweat clothes, order a 'Za or some Chinese, and watch a movie. Not so bad.

It's taken me a while to come to terms with the duality of having feminine and masculine sides, but now that I have, life is good. I've been married three times for a total of thirty plus years, and have finally discovered that Living Alone is not the worst thing in the world.