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Thread: To Pass or Not to Pass?

  1. #51
    Silver Member kellycan27's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fab Karen View Post
    You've implied passing equals being seen as "hot stuff" ( women come in a variety of forms ), & that girls ( GG's ) get such special treatment because they are female ( when as I mentioned the reality is there are GG's your age who don't get that special treatment from guys ).
    No, I answered the OP's question based on my experience. if there is any disparity between the way one girl is treated from another you need to put the blame squarely where it belongs...and that is men. You are probably seeing some conceited little b***h, but the truth of the matter is, that it makes no difference what I think because it's men who will ultimately decide if they find me ( or anyone else for that matter) attractive or not.Take passing completely out of the equation and look at the relationship between gg's and gm's... Right or wrong, this is how it's been played out for years and years. true?
    I never said that one has to be Penelope Cruz to get attention.. all you need is for men to find you attractive. Yup women come in all shapes and sizes, and so does the attraction for them.

    Kel
    "one day I'll fly away..... leave all this to yesterday"

    http://youtu.be/kR7NlgwVHHg

  2. #52
    Gold Member Kaitlyn Michele's Avatar
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    this is always such a hot button thing...

    i don't see why anyone would get attacked for making statements about how great it is to pass...especially in a forum where we see questions like is passing the holy grail? or OMG I PASSED!! as topics..

  3. #53
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    about and being mehere is nothing wrong with passing and there is nothing wrong with not passing. The truth is all of us will never know when we pass or when we dont, because passing realies on another person. Well maybe the mind readers know. In Kelly's case she recieves affirmation that she is a woman but being referred to as maam, miss, etc. Also by the looks she gets from men, and maybe envious glances from women.

    In my case i am sometimes referred to in the female vernacular. Is that being polite or just being kind. I dont know. I am also referred to as a male at times. Yet I have always been treated with respect. I have been approached and asked if I know the time or for directions. I havent got too many strange stares so is that passing or being accepting. In the end I am ok with just being out and about and being me. I appreciate what Allie showed me, just being yourself means that you pass as a human being to most people. They will respond to kindness and friendliness with the same.

  4. #54
    Fab Karen Fab Karen's Avatar
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    We all were young once, and some of us had some attention of being treated as though we were special because of how we looked. At least eventually we know it shouldn't be taken seriously. It's not about any particular person.
    The point being made is that "passing" if you INSIST on repeating the term, does not necessarily mean you have to look like Kelly or ( insert name here ) or literally be taken up close for a GG- the definition changes according to the ideas of the person using the word. And inexperienced girls will bolt the door to the outside world because "I can't go outside, I won't pass!" ( meaning meet the harshest judgement of what passing supposedly means ).
    And as many have said & will say, we don't know what people are thinking, though they may show basic respect for our gender-identity. We do the best we can with what we've got ( unless we feel a deep need to change our body with hormones & surgery ) & and get out when we can and live out in the world because we are fellow human beings & have that right. Focus on being treated with respect as a member of this diverse society & time we live in, stop thinking about "do they/will they think I'm a GG??" & go. None of us regret doing so. You hold the key to your prison cell, as well as the key to greater understanding from society.
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  5. #55
    Silver Member kellycan27's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fab Karen View Post
    We all were young once, and some of us had some attention of being treated as though we were special because of how we looked. At least eventually we know it shouldn't be taken seriously. It's not about any particular person.
    The point being made is that "passing" if you INSIST on repeating the term, does not necessarily mean you have to look like Kelly or ( insert name here ) or literally be taken up close for a GG- the definition changes according to the ideas of the person using the word. And inexperienced girls will bolt the door to the outside world because "I can't go outside, I won't pass!" ( meaning meet the harshest judgement of what passing supposedly means ).
    And as many have said & will say, we don't know what people are thinking, though they may show basic respect for our gender-identity. We do the best we can with what we've got ( unless we feel a deep need to change our body with hormones & surgery ) & and get out when we can and live out in the world because we are fellow human beings & have that right. Focus on being treated with respect as a member of this diverse society & time we live in, stop thinking about "do they/will they think I'm a GG??" & go. None of us regret doing so. You hold the key to your prison cell, as well as the key to greater understanding from society.
    Karen
    I totally agree with everything that you just said. My only intent was to offer a slightly different prospective. A prospective that I have been lucky enough to have experienced.

    Kel
    "one day I'll fly away..... leave all this to yesterday"

    http://youtu.be/kR7NlgwVHHg

  6. #56
    The Girl Next Door Sally24's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tulip;2230686m
    What is your take on this? If you have experience passing for female, was it all you thought it would be? If you are more like my friend, what helps you accomplish goals? Or are you happy to be the best you can be, and find sojme pleasure dressing around accepting loved ones? Is it about passing so no one knows...or others know but the acceptance is the overall goal? Acceptance is passing?
    To get back on topic.........
    I would have to say that passing has been more than I ever even fantasised about! The times that I receive full GG treatment are some of the best times of my life. Especially when out with my wife and daughter I get just a taste of what my life could have been.

    That being said, I have gotten by the early days where I was deathly afraid that people would "know". When out with other tall t-girls I am quite content with being seen as feminine but not female. Looking attractive is enough of a goal for me.

    If your friends face has the possibility of looking feminine he might benefit from some professional makeup instruction. Also, attending a convention like SCC can be a very safe relaxing eye opening experience.

    Kudos to you for caring about your friend so much!
    Sally

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