My wife has known for years and supports me 100%.
My wife has known for years and supports me 100%.
Mine knows and basicly accepts it. We have been shopping together, but I was not dressed. We have been out to gay/drag bars with both of us dressed to show off our stocking tops and garter straps. I have been told I have better legs than hers but with her natural 40D's she beats me out in the tit and ass department!!!!
She now refers to me as her big sister she never had, but is quick to point out that she is not into incest. lol
Oh well, I will take whatever I can get.
[SIZE="3"]My wife knows and accepts to a degree. She does not want to see me in a dress, wig, or make-up. I can where shorts, Capri's, jeans, bra, forms, lipstick, frilly tops, and heels around her. She incouraged me to go to a Tri-Ess meeting and join. We have gone shopping with me in drab. She has also picked up makeup for me. She is slowly getting there, maybe. She has only known for almost a year. We have been married more than 20 years. I vote to tell before marriage, easier in the long run.[/SIZE]
Marcia (LOVES) Blue
My life partner knows, loves, supports and accepts! We have play dates at least once a month! But it dint start out that easy, I did have to work on it a lot to get to where I am now. But it was all a worth it!
My wife is very accepting with the acception of being a little freaked about people she works with finding out. I can live with that. She went with me yesterday to pick out new boobs. We clothes shop all the time. She is a nail tech and does my mani pedis and just waxed my eyebrows for the first time. i talked to her about going to some clubs or weekend things and she seems excited to get out and meet othe people.
I believe therefore I can [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
My wife knows, but she told me she will never accept or participate And as long as I don't dress around her, she's satisfied. But ever now and then, she will give me someting. Like a pair of panythose or a bracelet she doen't want.
My wife has known of my dressing since a few weeks into our relationship and we have now been together for over 16 years.
She accepts that I dress but that is where it stops for her. All wardrobe acquisitions, dressing and the like are done on my own time and money and out of view. It is not exactly what I want but I am fortunate for this and accept it as is.
My Lovely spouse supports me more than I could wish for. But please do not try to hide it, supress it, deny it, for twenty years like I did. Twenty years of living as who I was not. Good luck on your journey my friend.
Charlena
Last edited by Charlena; 08-22-2010 at 08:13 PM. Reason: add
May the stars carry your sadness away,
May the flowers fill your heart with beauty,
May hope forever wipe away your tears,
And, above all, may silence make you strong.
Chief Dan George
The SO has know for about 1 1/2 years, been marrried for 40 plus. Having the talk before a steady relationship developes is the best idea. I dress in front of her but I'm nervous. She hasn't seen me dressed to the nines yet but I'm working on it.
Hugs,
Alice
Thanks for talking about your SOs, everyone. I appreciate the input and feedback. It's great to hear that so many of you have loves in your life that are so accepting.
I told my late wife I was a CD when I proposed to her. She not only accepted me, but also supported me for the almost 50 years we had together. Always doing my makeup and fixing my wig! I live in the U.S.A. and my girl friend lives in the U.K. She does know and also supports me. I believe in total honesty, so any lady in my life is going to know all about me!
Stephanie
Lady on the outside, but man underneath!
My wife discovered my dressing this past spring. It has not been easy or comfortable, but she has helped me tremendously. She found me a wonderful woman therapist who has transitioned. She even dressed me up and took me out to a drag show at a local bar one night! Things are not always easy though. Open communication is key, although it isn't always easy. I just wish I would have told her when we met. Things would be a lot easier right now.
I've never rally told my wife, but she does have some suspicion. She hates it when I shave my chest and makes a big deal about being clean shaved. "Oh, your at it again" she'll say. And she has told me things like she knows things about me I think she doesn't know. I have dressed in full en femme for Halloween and she told me I enjoyed it too much. I have never openly admitted it to her, I have given her hints and have talked about cross dressers and then she says it sick, appalling shes just plain negative. However, my Halloween adventure was considered harmless. Its ok if she's teasing me about it, but if I agree to it than its going to be ugly. I know her too well. So why haven't I told her already? Well there are many reasons. Last year her dad died, the year before that we were struggling with our mortgage and it goes on. we have enough problems, and kids. I did the Halloween thing in 07. At that time I was close to telling her but of course other thing stressed her out. She is too stressed out all the time. I can go on all night, so I'll shut up now. Valerie
All I wanted was a Pepsi and she wouldn't give it to me.
my wife tolerates my crossdressing. She prefers that I don't dress. Although, she doesn't mind me underdressing and has occasionally bought me bras and panties. Andrea
My wife tolerates my crossdressing but she is certainly not enthusiastic about it. That said, she has been to support group meetings with me and I have no problems if I'm fully dressed in front of her, as long as I don't do it to often.
I'm on my own for shopping (have mail order sent openly to the house), I try to fit dressing in while she's out and she basically doesn't want to talk about it that often. This arrangement seems to be working for 10 years now.
Melissa, if you're serious about this gf (i.e. you plan to marry or make a long-term life together), tell her sooner rather than later.
I came out to my wife, five years ago, six months into dating. It was hard, she doesn't understand completely, but she deals with it. I'm not a CDer who has to dress all the time, so this helps a lot. We make a lot of compromises, but I'd rather be with her and have some tension on occasion, rather than be without her and no tension. Depends on what's important to you. . .
-Sedona
An S.O. that knows and accepts is actually not that rare. Most times the non-acceptance comes from not knowing and or from not wanting to let it be known.
My situation was different from most. I not only have a knowing and supportive S.O. and have for years. We are both now T.S post-op. So as you can guess its been a strange road we traveled.
Danni
My wife knows I dress and is ok for the most part, she has gone out a few times with me shopping but sometimes doesn't like when I keep shaving my legs. She seems to like my shopping for clothes with me which I really enjoy
I am in the group with the lucky girls. I told my GF a year ago and she was accepting and supportive right from the first conservation. We have gone out shopping numerous time together and have also gone out to the clubs a few times.
I have very recently told her that I wanted to grow some breasts and start on HRT. She accepts this and says she will support me 100%. She has no problems telling her friends or family about me. She seems un-phased by other peoples opinions. I have a wonderful woman!
Hinting is not telling. If you really want your girlfriend to know, you need to have a proper discussion about it. She may feel hurt that you've hidden this side of yourself from her, that you didn't trust her enough to share it. Hints go way off target. They don't work.
Why are you so sure she would not approve? Is she not as broadminded as you? Is she closed off to other things that you like - films, books, plays, nights out? Do you share anything as a couple?
I've asked the question many times on this forum, but i'm asking you because I guess you're young and because we now live in more enlightened times. If you accept that the CDing is part of who you are, then it's fair to share that with your partner, the person who you might end up sharing your life with. If she is unaccepting now, then is she really the person you should be with?
I'm not married. but my girlfriend knows and is completely supportive. I absolutely love having her involved in this part of my life, but then I have made it a point to be honest with her. I told her within our first week of going out, and haven't hid anything since.
Crystal
My last g/f was really cool and we even turned it to our advantage ("pretend your a lesbian coming on to me but I'm straight"). She used to help me shop etc too. My wife is OK to a point. She understands it's something I need to do and it's not going away but she doesn't want to see it or help with it although in the early days she did help me shopping for undies. She's also very much of a 'I like my men hairy' so I can't shave in any shape or form which is a real bummer. Still, could be a lot worse! I'd echo what others have said though, tell early if at all possible. In most cases, it's the deceipt that hurts not the crossdressing.
Melissacd33 I really feel for you, you really should talk to your gf about this, you are a cd. I went 28 years of marriage before I told my wife, and it hasn't been easy, sometimes better than others. The deceit and lying, loss of trust has been the worst of it, was a real mistake not telling her before marriage. If you tell her you may lose her, but if you dont you may lose her because she'll suspect somethings wrong somewhere, somehow. My advice is let her make the choice before its to late and may not have any other options later on in life.
My wife knows of it and accepts it, but she does have her limits. Most of the "heavy dressing" she prefers I give advance warning, she doesn't like coming out in the morning looking for her husband and finding her girlfriend, which I can understand. She knew about it before we got married and actually mentioned at one point that once we got to the hotel room after our reception that we'd trade outfits and I'd wear the dress didn't happen but that she felt open enough to talk about it like that makes me glad I married her!
Hi Melissa!
Lucky one here!
Jean has known since the day I asked her to marry me.
Here it was, the hardest thing that I had ever done before and had never told anyone. I told her that I just couldn't get married without giving her the option of not wanting a life like this.
She looked at me and said "So!"
That conversation was twenty years ago this month!
She is the one who helped me accept who I am.
So yes, I am one of the lucky ones.
I wear the clothes at all times I am home. We ask each other about fashion sugestions all the time.