How to tell your partner

[Donna]

Marla has given a wonderful gift to all of us still in the closet.

Thank you

Donna

[Raychel]

Hello Marla,

I found your post very informative. My wife knows that I like to wear womens lingerie and swimsuits. I don't think that she knows that I also like to wear dresses also. I have not built up the courage to tell her that too. I am not sure why I feel that I should not tell her that. She is pretty accepting on me. I guess that I just don't want to push the issue.

I am sure that my wife knows that I have been on this site. She has walked into the room when I have had it minimized on the computer, and I am sure that she has seen the button for it on the bottom of the screen.

Anyway I find that you have some great information to add to the group, and I have a question to ask of you. I am thinking about telling my wife about this forum and I am wondering if you would have some helpful tips on that subject. Without freeking her out.

Raychel

[Marla GG]

Hi Raychel,

You can PM me if you'd like to chat more about this. I assume you are you asking how you should tell your wife that you like to visit this site?

I think the best way would be to explain to her that you are trying to learn more about crossdressing in order to understand yourself better and be more sensitive to her needs. Tell her that you have found a forum which is dedicated to sharing crossdressing information and support, and explain how much it is helping you. Emphasize that it is a tasteful site where wives and family members are welcome, not a sleazy porn site. Offer to show her the site if she wants to see it.

I think, given what you've said about your wife's level acceptance, that she should be okay with you visiting here once she understands that it is really a support forum and not a XXX site. And telling her would be a good idea, because minimizing things when she walks into the room is probably making her suspicious.

Best of luck to you.

[Colleen Boucher]

HI Marla,

I am on the Committee of The Seahorse Society of Victoria...I would just love to have your writing published in our monthly magazine with your kind permission. It would be a great article for our memebrs.

Cheers

Colleen

[Marla GG]

Hi Colleen,

I'm very flattered that you would like to reprint this. If it is too long for your magazine, I can send you a condensed version. I'll PM you, okay? Thanks!

[Colleen Boucher]

HI Marla,

Just love to get it our magazine editor..if you wish include your address and we will arrange to send you a copy of our mag with the article in it.

Just email me privately on

charterbuilder@optusnet.com.au

Cheers

Colleen

[ginafaye]

great post marla best wishes to you and angel

[Abby Lauren]

I'm so glad Gina Faye rescued this thread from the past. It is so thoughtful and well-written, it deserves to be right up front. A glowing tribute to Marla.

[Veronica E. Scott]

Hi Marla

Thank you for your post,I have realized that every now and then our creator sends us Angels to watch over us and help us with what ever we are going through it is because he loves us and wants the best for his children.I believe he has sent us You to heip us and our SO. Thank you I believe we are truly blessed.

[windycissy]

This is without question the most inspirational post I have read on this forum. Would that all GG's were as understanding and accepting as Marla! I have always kept my femme side under wraps, and when I come out of the closet for a little while it is so hard to go back in! Maybe someday I'll find the courage to follow your advice....Cissy

[Tina Dixon]

Fantastic post, this should stay at the top all the time

[suanne]

To Marla. My day started out kind of ho...hum and as usual I checked in on the forum. I went to the M to FM section and again noticed your thread. I opened it and started to read. I really needed that. It just opened up a flood gate of emotion within me. I have been so troubled with my crossdressing through out the years and your advice and show of affection for all of us (closet crossdressers) really touched my heart. I want to tell you that our lives (my wife and me) was changed forever when she caught me dressed so many years ago. I know that she has never forgot that moment and neither have I. I wanted to tell her about this important part of me before and after that time but have never been able to go thru with it. After she caught me we separated. I went to see a shrink and swore I wouldn't do it (dress) anymore. That is one of the few promises I haven't kept. We got back together and I have been in the closet ever since. I have tired to stop (and did for some years) but always started dressing again. I really think she knows that I dress, but that is as far as it goes. Every now and then she makes comments about people with weird life styles. I am sure that is directed in part to me. I just want you to know that your understanding and support is very important to me and as you can see from the response, it is important to many others as well. Please continue with your efforts. I can say this for certain. To us who are still struggling with our SO's or wives and still in the closet about this part of us, your words are very, very, helpful. We do not need people giving us poor advice. We need sound, mature counsel. You are giving us that. Angel is very fortunate to have you as a helpmeet and we in this forum are very, very fortunate to have you as a leader and friend.

From my heart, Suanne

[Theresa9]

Marla for that necessary information for the CD SO.

Angel Darling you are indeed a lucky person to have such an understanding and supportive partner in your life.

[Carole/CCD]

what more can i say very informative

[RebeccaLynne]

Marla, for the first time today I read your post and the suggested references. Funny I never noticed it before, having joined this site late August of '05. I've just recently become a member of a dating site, and have been agonizing over the issue of disclosure. I realize the importance of complete honesty with any potential partners, and have gained insight and understanding of the complex reactions of those who may be impacted. The dilemma with which I am now faced is when to tell? I'll solicit the advice of my confidants here through the posting of a new thread, but wanted you to know I'm eternally grateful for your words of wisdom and the inspirational links you've provided. Sincerely, RebeccaLynne.

[Kristen Kelly]

I can't help but play devil's advocate for this idea. People will do what they have to do but i feel it will end in sadness as mine did.

I have come to the conclusion of what as meant to be will be. For myself I had supressed the urge to dress for almost 3 years, but found myself unhappy and didnt care how I looked. I put on weight something I would have never done when I was dressing. I know I must tell my GF of 10 years(not live in) about my dressing before we make any wedding plans. I have not told her up until this point out of being uncertain of my true feelings about dressing, fear of telling her and the rejection, and most of all how she could ruin my life. I want to thank you for a wonderful post you presented a very good general outline I can use. As for her accepting me she has always enjoyed the feminity I showed in the things I did and could accept and loved that in drab dress. I feel when I share my secret with her it becomes her secret to for I am not out to work, and with my daytime dressing the neighbors have seen me by now, and someone might just say something. So Im now ready to face my fears and turn the next card over, and hope to mold my fate into what I want.