Today was my first big day of going out into the cold, cruel, judgemental world. Two of my gg friends agreed to go out with me on a Girls Day Out which included Olive Garden and shopping. First let me say that shopping is exhausting work. Being a woman is no easy task either and Dress Barn is awesome! So I had been kinda freaking out all day Friday and Saturday morning. I had a headache and an upset stomach. Then "L" came over with her son and I started to "get my girl on." I choose a demin capris and white peasent blouse that I found at Target days earlier, very cute. Next came the makeup and then the hair. We were running a little late to Olive Garden but timed it right with meeting up with "K." She was a little nervous about how she would handle seeing me for the first time all done up considering we dated a few times and...well nevermind. Suffice to say, she was totally cool with me. So in we go - moment of truth being seen by people. OMG the staring, the laughing, the pointing, the WTF is that that just walked in the door - freak!!!! Wait nope, that didn't happen. Instead it was a man saying hello "Ladies" and he showed us to a table. Then it was the waiters turn, hello "Ladies" and the people at the next booth that could see me, no they were to interested in making googly eyes at "L's" baby boy. I must admit, I had a hard time excepting whenever someone would say "Ladies," it was like don't you people realize that I am a dude in women's clothes, come on, take a closer look. Ok there was one guy who was looking occasionally at me but he would go back to talking about something else to his girl. As a thank you to L and K, I paid for lunch and used my check card, thank god they do all of that at the table. Now L had to do some pumping so K, the baby and I went for a walk around the area through their fake downtown. Busy with traffic and pedestrians and no one had an accident or got killed in the crosswalks due to me, cause that would have sucked.
Then it was on to a strip Mall and Dressbarn. We went into DB first and started browsing, found the clearance racks and some ugly tops even my Grandma wouldn't wear. I mean please, some of those tops were just screaming, "buy me and lets go play shuffleboard down in Florida with all the other retirees." Then we found some tops, then some dresses, then more dresses. Pretty soon we had an arm load of about a dozen or more items for me to try on. An SA came over and took them for us and placed them in a large fitting room. It was large enough for all three of us and a stroller to fit and yes this might seem weird, but L and K were so cool and I was wearing a few layers of undergarments, layers being the operative word here. There were some dresses that I really liked, one dress was sort of a 50's style metallic purple, just awesome, but the collar was so big and bulky. Most dresses would require taking in or they were tight in the underarms giving me armpit cleavage. I ended up buying a top and a top/sweater set that I can wear with many other things in my closet.
Then we decided to check out the TJ Max store in the mall for perhaps a skirt and I have been wanting a hoodie, something casual but cool like the Pink Brand at VS. First we headed down the mall and no one stared. They all just walked right by me without even paying attention. Why is it when I want women to acknowledge that I exist, I can't even get them to blink in my general direction? This was the one time that I didn't want any of that and of course no one looked. I live in Minnesota, and we are known for being "Nice" and polite, but there is no way that everyone in the St. Louis Park area got the "Be nice to the Crossdresser" message.
So now we are in TJ Max and it is busy and this kinda caught me off guard because everything else was quiet in the mall. All the racks are close together and lots of people moving around each other, so this would be a huge test. I was always aware of my surroundings but it was fun to just browse the racks looking for things to consider owning. No hoodies, didn't really find a skirt but I found some grey slacks to try on. I always loved the wool winter coats that women wear that extend down beyond the butt a little and are usually in black, grey or white. White is the cutest color for those coats, so we started looking. Found some, but most just didn't fit right and were awfully expensive. So both L and I went to try on our items, we both struck out on those. By now, I was in need of a bathroom. So we wandered around the mall and found the public restrooms and well I certainly can't go into the guys looking like this. Ugh, layers, ugh fake fingernails, ugh buttons and zippers. How do women even survive the day. I can't even cheat and stand up like Mrs. Doubtfire cause there are other women in the bathroom and that would just be to loud. The vending machines have totally different products then in the mens. It is all condoms. Who goes to the mall and suddenly decides "hey I need a condom," tampons, yes that is necessary. So I came out - of the bathroom and found the 2 sitting on a bench looking exhausted. I sat down and we watched other people and talked a little. We were tired and decided it had been a long day, it was nearing 6pm. So we headed out to the car, dopped K off and L, and her son and I headed back to my place. It felt good to "get my girl off." It was only then that I realized - NO FREAKING PICTUREexcept for one bad closeup of just my face and I can't use it.
I do want to thank L and K for being with me. Only a few months ago, I kept Shelby locked away from the world, I took her out a few times but that was small in comparison to today. I am thankful that I found this site. A few years ago when I was preparing to dress as a woman for a interactive murder mystery, I checked this place out. I resisted the idea of admitting what I always knew I was. I thought that it was just something that will go away or I can deny. I even tried not coming here for awhile, but that didn't last long. Soon I was in for a penny, in for a pound and contributing and making friends. I have so many great friends here and love you all. This site does bring out a side of me that does effect how I live my life as a guy and for the better. If there are any real women out there reading this and coming to terms with your guy wanting to dress please know this, he is a better human being because of this but is no less of a man or less of the man you love. I hope that I find a woman who will love and except me for how I live my life. I am also thankful for being a guy when it comes to shopping cause that is way more easier and cheaper, so thank you genetics for balls. I have a great life even if it isn't all complete yet.
Shelby
