Are you afraid of being caught? (and what if you were?)

[Carly D]

What am I afraid of if I were caught?? The unknown more than anything else.. I figure there are the known elements of "are you gay?? are you weird?? molest children?? molest puppies??" yadda yadda yadda.. But the truth is telling was attractive to me a few years ago (ten years ago and then a couple years as well) but my fear of telling isn't the known or the unknown but rather the fact that this little secret I've been keeping for the better part of my life couldn't be undone.. To tell would mean it's out there.. Everyone knows and there is no going back.. No way of being the way it is now.. For better or worse this is the way I want it to be for now and indefinitely.. I have gone out dressed, and being out doesn't mean in public but rather in controlled situation such as a one person situation... I can honestly say maybe up to a hundred people have seen me dressed this way but didn't know it.. I was going about my normal day to day things just not in male clothing and it was night time as well.. Dimly lit areas..

[Cassi3]

I'm not really worried about the neighbors finding out, except for one or two. What I am afraid of is my dad finding out. He has no clue and as homophobic as he is, though he says he isn't, he would definitely ask me to leave. He equates CD'ing with being gay or having some serious mental issue.

[julia ann]

That is a question that had always bothered me. However, about two months ago my three boys found out about daddy, it was all good they seemed to understand. Since than I have thinned my eyebrows alot, thinned and lightened my arm hair and go out on a regular basis with a light coat of mascara and always clear polished nails with no fear. The wife already knew and now that the kids know there is no one else to hide from. If an accident were to happen it would be a little embarrasing but once I got past the kids anyone else will be easy.l

[bobbiexd]

Yes! The SO knows(has known for many years) and I believe 1 of my 2 daughters, but in this scenario and were I live(the other side of the backwater-redkneck town) embarrassing would be the least of the problems.

[Michaela42]

Well, yes and no. On one hand I think being 'outed' would allow me to further express my feminine side. I am under no illusions thought that not everyone would accept me; hell, most of them do not accept the 'me' that is here now.

As I have grown and matured I have pretty much cut anyone out of my life that was not absolutely necessary and who would not accept 'Makaila' in any way, but there are still a few that would not accept me that I have not been able to cut ties with yet. That time will come, I know, and hopefully everyone involved will be able to keep control of their emotions and think rationally.

[Tess]

. If and when it does happen, I'm going to be super nonchalant about it all. Like it's the most natural thing in the world. If I'm "pushed into a corner" I'll just shrug and say "yeah, I know its weird to some people, but I happen to like it"

I like that and it is now my contingency plan if discovered. Most of you girls are far braver than I. The fear of being outed keeps my feminizing to a minimum. My wife doesn't know but I'm able to go a little further than you would suspect because my wife has medical issues which give her horrible vision and almost no sense of smell. Her medical condition is to complex to go into here but it allows me a certain level of freedom with feminizing baby steps. I wear panties most days, shave my underarms, keep my toe nails buffed and shinned to a high gloss, wear women's deodorant and sometimes perfume. And I'll probably continue to push slowly forward without going over board. As far as a situation that would put me in the ER, I'm in denial.

[jessica renee]

Mine is a unique situation. While I have been out shopping, running errands, and doing day-to-day tasks in girl mode, my friends and family do not know about Jessica. I don't really worry about an accident or something similar, because as previously stated, I figure that ER personnel have probably seen most everything. Also, if I'm hurt bad enough to need emergency care, I would hope what I was wearing would be the least of their worries.

As for my friends, family, and co-workers finding out, I actually do worry about that because I know that some of them would not be accepting. Granted, some would be, but I just don't want to test my ideas of which would and which wouldn't.

[BRANDYJ]

Hmmm? Being caught? It depends on who might catch me. I am out to my SO, so that's not an issue. I had to go to the hospital for surgury once and the 2 nurses commented on my shaved chest when they were hooking up the EKG. One asked why I shaved it. I simply said that my sweetheart likes it that way and that was the end of it. They did not ask about the shaved legs or pits though. I think in the future if a doctor or nurse asked about the shaved body, I'd simply say I prefer ti that way and let it go.

[chelle]

I wear panties every day except when I have a Dr appointment. I did have my panties on several times at the Dr, but they were rather bland and could be seen as male undies. Once however I have my better panties on and the Dr said I needed a shot in my hip so had to expose my panties and nothing was said. I keep my chest and underarms shaved and get a echo cardiogram done every year and heart Dr never said anything. I even taught his kids in school. I drove about 200 miles home tonight fully dressed and wondered what I'd do if I had a wreck. I often am dressed on long trips with wife. She has said "one day its going to happen"

[eluuzion]

Yep, I have wondered about the issue. Nope…have not been “caught”, yet…

My curiosity took a different but similar path on the issue in a past thread. It’s around here someplace. I had a hernia about a year ago, which of course I procrastinated seeing a surgeon about, just like I do with dental issues and dentist appointments, lol.

My question was…if some catastrophe presented itself when I was “dressed”, would I risk further injury by taking the time to “change clothes” before I called for help?

Well, lucky me, I got to find out the answer to that question. That minor “bump” in my groin turned into an emergency one night while watching TV. I ended up flat on my back on the bathroom floor, (in a little black dress and 5” pumps) holding my palm over my groin in an effort to keep my entrails from squishing out under my skin.

As I lay there living the nightmare every person living alone hopes to avoid, I got my answer. I would rather risk my health than commit “social suicide”, lol. So, I took a deep breath and began the mission of trying to change clothes and “clean up” before calling for “help”. I lived happily ever after, but it was interesting to learn how much I am willing to risk to maintain control over who knows what about my personal life…

Oh, and yes, the next day I did schedule hernia repair surgery …

[Juanita O]

well the biggest fear I have is being caught out in public. I used to worry about getting caught in public because the job I retired form you need a security clearance. I know that I don't pass very well and that is what is holding me back.

[Sarah Doepner]

I was caught by my mother nearly 50 years ago and nothing really happened. Several years ago my wife came home while I was changing and although I wasn't formally caught, I outted myself to her. After a couple of weeks, some research and discussions she was comfortable with it. Just over 2 years ago I retired and, as far as I can tell, the Retirement system won't fire me or dock my pay because I'm a crossdresser.

That leaves friends and family. My friends will find out one of these days, I'll tell them, just to get it out of the way and I'm confident they will remain my friends. The rest of the family will be an issue because my wife doesn't want her very elderly parents to have to deal with it. Since they live next door, I am careful at home. Our kids will probably be okay with my crossdressing, but the grandchildren will be a big judgement call. We'll probably have to be out to their parents before anything is addressed there. However, they do approve of my Nurse costume on Halloween.

What will I say when I'm caught next time? I'll try to focus on how nothing is different about me from the last time that person saw me other than how I'm dressed. If I can do that and not panic, things should go well enough.

[Jilmac]

I used to worry about being caught (especially by my kids) when I had a hidden stash in the basement and dressed covertly. My wife knew but totally disapproved and was in deep denile. My wife passed away in 2007 which gave me the opportunity to dress as I wish any time. I have a new SO now who knows all about Jill and my kids are all on their own so I don't have to concern myself with being caught by them.

That being said, I now wear panties 24/7 (drab or dressed), keep my toenails painted and lags shaved, had my ears pierced, and keep my closet filled with all my pretty clothes. I have had physical exams, that wonderful (LOL) experience of a prostate exam, and various checks by my nurse/practitioner at my local VA medical center, and I don't really give a rats a** if somebody sees my panties, shaved legs or painted toenails.

The biggest reason for my change of attitude is simple; There's no harm being done to anybody, and it's nobody's business what I choose to wear. I always try to use discretion in respect to certain boundries between me and my SO, but being caught is no longer an issue for me.

[Emily Ann Brown]

When caught, I had the big talk and dumped it all on the table. Was January 2006...the hell started August 2006...I signed the separation agreement May 2007...the final divorce was March 2008. Any fear is it becoming an issue a work, but I have pierced ears and wear studs. The hair is mine. I have too long for guy nails. I survived the accident..had painted toenails and pantyhose on when the meds saw me. Oh well. Put me into the "don't give a flip anymore"catagory.

Em

[CuriousAdmirer]

I'm terrified to be caught but at the same time I think it'd be a lot less stress off my back with the truth out there.

[LoriFlores]

These two quotes pretty much sum up how I feel about it all. I'm me, no one can tell me what I should and shouldn't do (except maybe my wife LOL ) .... I'm not breaking any laws and I'm not hurting anyone.

Over the past 2-3 years I've steadily increased and feminized my boy self to to the point that I do think I stand out as being "different". I have no body hair. My eyebrows are tweezed very thin, my nails are long for a guy (1/8" past my finger tips) and are shaped and and always painted in either shiny clear for work, or a subtle color on the weekends. My toenails are always painted in a bright color. I always wear a bra and panties and sometimes my girls tees are thin enough to show a suggestion of a bra strap. I have not got "caught" yet by anyone at work or the neighbors or whatever. My wife is supportive so there's no problem there. If and when it does happen, I'm going to be super nonchalant about it all. Like it's the most natural thing in the world. If I'm "pushed into a corner" I'll just shrug and say "yeah, I know its weird to some people, but I happen to like it"

Rachel and I are in full agreement here. If I'm ever in an accident, I have bigger things to worry about than my bodies feminization. I've gotten to the point that this is me and I'm OK with it.

[paulaloha]

I must admit I am still afraid of being outed.

Though mostly it is to my friends, I think they might be OK with it, but I'm still too afraid to find out.

I think my parents would be cool with it as they are pretty open minded and understanding. But I still haven't really talked to them much about it. I know that at least my dad knows I dress a little bit. He came home early one day while I was dressed, I didn't hear him come in the house so he just walked into the kitchen while I was sitting there dressed in a skirt and tank top with a stuffed bra under it.

I never go out in public dressed, but sometimes I will drive somewhere if it's early in the morning or late at night, with a skirt on or something. I always keep it below the waist.
Though if I were in an accident or something I wouldn't really worry about it if I were seriously hurt. I know Paramedics, Doctors and Nurses get to see lots of things and I don't think that would be terrible if they found out. I'm sure they have seen worse in their line of work.

[Jorja]

Before I decided to transition and become a girl I always worried about being found out. The longer I stayed in the closet, the more mistakes I made until one day it happened. When accidently left my stash trunk unlocked and my then wife found it, I answered like this. No, these are not womens clothes,THEY ARE MINE, EVEN THE HEELS! We tried to deal with it but she just couldn't handle it. She filed for divorce 3 weeks later.

[Amy Lynn3]

I figure if it happens I'll deal with it then, like the other day. I had a sinus infection and went to my doctor, which is female. She said I must give you a shot, along with pills. I pulled up my shirt sleeve to take my shot and she said no....this must go in the butt. When my pants came down my white Shadowline panties were all that was showing. I started pulling those down and she helped get them down and gave me the shot and never blinked an eye.

[Sallee]

I think only us CD worry about getting caught I have known a few guys who where toe nail polish usually black so that is kind of macho. I have done it several times and have been questioned. My answer was that I was getting pedicure and I had to pay for the painting whether I got it or not. Don't now if it worked but nothing more was said. Most folks won't notice and if they do nothing will be said

[Asako]

Honestly, yes I was afraid of my parents seeing me. Today, my dad happened to do just that. We both kept our heads at the time but I think for a while I broke his mind with the way his body language came across! Me? I know my body language was a little akward but I acted as if nothing was amiss. ^.^ He didn't say anything when he dropped me off at work or when he picked me up. It's probably picked at him all night too. =/ So yea, my contingency is to act like nothing is wrong and honestly, nothing IS wrong.

[lingerieLiz]

Well once upon a time I was worried about getting caught. Then I was caught, caught again ... , and again. Nothing happened much after the first time when I was about 11. My dad gave me a terrible explanation about sex and had no clue about CDing or much else. I've worn panties most of my adult life and now wear a bra much of the time. My wife told me the other day that I have bigger boobs than a lot of women.

My military neighbors knew when I was in the service. Thin drapes. Had a girl where I shopped for clothes introduce me to her dad (sgt) by saying. "He buys all his clothes at our (dress) shop."

Had a doctor notice my panties during treatment. She snapped them to let me know she was aware. She was cute and the next time I came in for treatment she said wow we have on the same.

Have had neighbors walk in unexpectedly. My neighbors where I live now know I wear women's clothes. My wife once outed me to her gg friends about my choice of lingerie by accident. I'm sure they told their husbands. All are still friends. I go shopping with the gg's and buy things if I desire.

I have traveled a lot and have worn bras. Been wanded a few times and had a gg flight attendant put her hand on my back to balance and feel my bra band. She apologized, but recovered. I told her it was fine. Had one gal look down my shirt and see my bra. She gave me the biggest smile. Have gotten up on stage to claim a valuable door prize in a silk shirt with bra under it. None of the couple hundred mostly male audience said anything later except how lucky I was.

All this is to let you know that you will get through it. Some people may have a problem with it, but that is not your problem. It is theirs. I've always been friendly and easy going. I have had a few people who had issues with it over the years. No one has tried to verbally or physically do anything even though I'm not big. I usually don't go out enfem, but do wear women's clothes openly (no skirts or dresses, no one does here except for special occasions).

[t-girlxsophie]

I would suggest that doctors and other medical staff have seen all sorts of weird and wonderful things,so a guy with painted toenails aint gonna freak them out.Although the last time I was rushed to hospital I did have time to clean of my toenail polish

I do a lot to Feminize myself,but most of it is undercover,Although I play soccer,and my bare legs and arms are on show,but I've never had any cause for concern,Anything further i may want to pursue will be after discussion with my wife,before deciding whether to go forward with any changes

Sophie xx

[Rachaelb64]

I got caught by my ex-wife, hence her being my ex.

I have gone thro a lot of heartache and struggle to accept myself and to tell those who are important to me, my GF, kids, sister and mum.

So if anyone else finds out, my answer to them is; 'And your problem with it is....?'

[GingerLeigh]

AAAAAGH! My heart would explode in fear and I'd probably c#$p my pants!

Well, I would at first...but...

Given a second thought, who really cares? There are far worse things being caught doing than crossdressing. Committing a major crime? Hurting someone intentionally? The planet will continue to turn, and life will go on. OK, so now someone knows you like women's clothes. Maybe that someone is one of your coworkers or significant other. So what? Is it something I want people to talk about behind my back? No, but at least they're not saying I'm a complete idiot, or saying I'm incompetent, criminally insane or abusive.
So I like silk, lace and pantyhose? Who doesn't? Wanna borrow a dress?


GingerLeigh