Damn! I spotted her....

[susandrea]

This morning when I was standing in line for the cash machine at the bank I spotted a crossdresser waiting to speak to one of the managers.

Positive I.D. I'm sure, and it got me to thinking how much I've changed in the last few years.

I remember about ten years ago I helped a CD in my store. She was dressed to the nines, very nicely, but about 6'3", broad shoulders, and no doubt a CD. I remember giggling after, along with the rest of the sales help-- but feeling kinda shitty and stupid later.

Then a few years ago as I got interested in the subject, if I spotted a CD I was curious. I certainly didn't feel like giggling, and remembered that time with shame. Instead I felt like approaching her and asking a few polite questions, but I didn't. Somehow it seemed intrusive, especially with a stranger.

Today when I spotted the CD in the bank I felt compassion. My first thought was, "Hey, there's a crossdresser". And the next immediate thought was, "Damn! I spotted her, but hurray for her I think she's passing for the most part".

I know for certain that I've gotten people around me who are completely clueless to re-think their reactions if they come across a CD, that staring or smirking is childish and uncool. When they find out the topic of the story I'm writing they're usually curious and ask questions. Some people say to me, "But I just don't get it". I answer, "That's not as important as being adult about it. Aren't there plenty of things in the world you don't underststand? Don't you think a CD who's brave enough to go out, especially alone, has enough to deal with without someone who knows better, staring at them? If it's all you can do to think of a crossdresser as a person with feelings, then that's a positive thing, and it benefits you as a person, not just them and their privacy".

I know for a fact I can't win everyone over. There are several people in my life that have their heels firmly planted in ignorance and fear. But the few who listen, may they will pass it on. I can only hope so.

Anyway, just sharing an observation that seemed appropriate here.

[urban gypsy]

When I make a postive ID of a cd I think you go girl. because they have more courage than me. because i will only go out in female clothing trousers / blouse and flat shoes, if my wife is with me as i seem to draw positive support from her. but definately no make up wigs or enhancements in day light hours in the street. and i only go out enfemme at night or earliest twilight again if my wife or one of my gay friends are with me, so this does not happen very often.

[Tristen Cox]

I've seen one person downtown here unmistakably a CD dressed sort of androgynous but certainly a CD. They held themselves quite well. Only wish I had that kind of confidence to 'walk alone' so to speak.

[susandrea]

I've seen one person downtown here unmistakably a CD dressed sort of androgynous but certainly a CD. They held themselves quite well. Only wish I had that kind of confidence to 'walk alone' so to speak.

Tristen, in all honesty you look a lot more feminine than half the women out there. If anyone spotted you as a CD it would be because they had a very keen eye and was paying particularly close attention (probably because they were interested in you as a hot babe!)

[urban gypsy]

I agree with susandrea. tristen you would put alot of women in the shade with your looks. I've seen most of your pics and you are stunning.

[Tristen Cox]

You haven't seen the drunk make up job I did

[erica michelle]

Can we see the drunk make up job you did , i am sure you would still look hot

[Tristen Cox]

Can we see the drunk make up job you did , i am sure you would still look hot

Now if I had actually 'used' the make up.....

[susandrea]

Now if I had actually 'used' the make up.....

A little "purge-a-rama-drama"? Uh-oh! :nerves:

[Tristen Cox]

No purge, I don't remember a thing!

[susandrea]

No purge, I don't remember a thing!

Well, that's okay once in awhile! Scares the boogymen away.

I just had to use that smiley!

[Kimberly]

Never seen a CD as was described in your story... seen some androgynous peeps... but no CDs.

... just me then? ... right.

[MsEva]

You are not alone!!!!

[susandrea]

Never seen a CD as was described in your story... seen some androgynous peeps... but no CDs.

... just me then? ... right.

Sometimes when I wear my 3-1/2" heels and tower over everyone I know, including most of the men around, (it puts me at 6'-1/2" and for some reason all my girlfriends are pretty little) I feel like the Incredible Hulk!

But it doesn't stop me wearing my killer heels.

[sportschick]

are you a GG? just curious about your status as a writer, that's all

[JocelynG]

I haven't spotted any CD'ers besides myself in the open. I almost feel like I am the only one around here that has actually ventured into the open. I can say that if I did spot one I would encourage her any way that I could and compliment her on her wardrobe,makeup, etc especially if it appeared that she looked nervous. I feel there is nothing like a compliment that makes us want to get out there and be proud of who we really are. And as for those who don't get it thats okay because maybe they are not ready for it and the more of us out there that do support it will maybe help those out there understand it

[Jen_TGCD]

Just something to think about...

A lot of those "crossdressers" that you see, out and about during the day, are probably pre-op Transexual. I have seen quite a few TS's but very few CD's. I could be wrong, but the TS's that I do notice, are usually wearing the most ordinary feminine clothing... the blending in thing... and usually not high-end fashion. TS's generally have financial problems... finding adequate work and the expense of transitioning. CD's seem to be more "fashion conscious", very neat and slightly over-dressed.

Again... I could be wrong. It's just something that I have observed over the years knowing both TS and CD women.

[Tristen Cox]

Eh hem, I lied Jen. There was another person completely dressed who came to the adult shop I used to work for. I'm not sure if it was the hamstrings the trashy high heels(very worn at the corners), the face(apple) or the fact that the dress she wore was way out of fashion and definitly not something you go shopping in to buy screens for your...for your....SINK... yeah sink that's what it was

[Jen_TGCD]

Eh hem, I lied Jen. There was another person completely dressed who came to the adult shop I used to work for. I'm not sure if it was the hamstrings the trashy high heels(very worn at the corners), the face(apple) or the fact that the dress she wore was way out of fashion and definitly not something you go shopping in to buy screens for your...for your....SINK... yeah sink that's what it was

Okay... I didn't mention the trashy, poorly made up guy with ugly legs and no sense of fashion that hangs out at "Adult Stores"...looking for "sink screens"!!!

Again... just my opinion... he was probably not a TS! :rotflmao:


Tristen... you worked at an Adult Store [slash] Head Shop??? OMG>>> There goes your rep... [size=3]again!!![/size] :-

Girls... on Tris's resume', it says, "Worked with trannies". I thought it meant she knew a lot about cars!

[tari]

thats a good point Jen. I came across a tg sister on a hike in yosemite natl park. Ts/cd/tg could'nt tell. She was doing the blend in thing. We spoke briefly, and I would have loved to talk at lenght, but I was with family. I made her and she knew it, but it was pleasant.

[Tristen Cox]

Again... just my opinion... he was probably not a TS! :rotflmao:

Actually she may very well have been a pre-op TS - it did look as those someone had don't some bone work F.F.S. surgery on her face but otherwise it was that blend in thing which the clothes did not accomplish.

Yeah it was a head shop and yes I sold those 'devices' daily to the young and old and had to answer questions. Now I bet you're wondering how I came up with the answers huh. Good luck sweetie, I don't kiss and tell :-

[Heelwearer2002]

had a cd come into my store twice now, helped her many on both occasions,,, i feel scared of complementing her on her bravery of fear in being outed as a cd myself, but would love to make friendship too.....

[Deidra Cowen]

Funny this thread has been going the last few days and I get the following email today...

HELLO BABY I SAW YOU @ THE MALL. I LIKE WHAT I SAW. IM
A BLACK TALL MAN AND I WOULD LOVE TO SPEND TIME W\
YOU. LETS TALK 678 xxx xxxx

....guess I'm not as passable as I thought I was. Funny thing is that I don't remember a tall black guy looking at me when out shopping Friday afternoon. But he had to have known I was a CD and knew enough to find my yahoo profile.

Oh well....makes me think about having public profiles...but I'm sure not going to stop going out. Its too much fun!

Deidra

[Wendy me]

here's somethink abought how manny did you not see that were out there????

[Lisa Maren]

Hi everyone

First, Tristen, you really do look pretty damn good -- I wish I could look that pretty. Maybe someday if I either get a wig or grow my hair long (and lose my think facial har lol).

Also, Susan, I wish there were a whole lot more people like you out there. If only everyone could see us with as much compassion as you do we'd all be much better off.

Hugs
Lisa