I'm wondering if ANY of u r completely free to dress whenever u like at home and/or in private!?
I have my daughter part time, so I'm NOT! If u have roommates, an SO, (live in or NOT), or live with relatives, you're NOT COMPLETELY free either!
I'm wondering if we must live alone and NEVER have unexpected guests, to be COMPLETELY FREE to do our private dressing?
If you're a closet dresser and can dress whenever the mood strikes u, what is it about your living situation that allows u that luxury?
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
Doesn't being "in the closet" MEAN you're not free to dress whenever you want, doc?
If you are free to dress whenever you want aren't you OUT of the closet?
Or does that just mean you "dress" only when completely alone?
Stephie
Oh, and BTW, I just LOVE your broom!
You're right, we are never completely free to dress whenever. My wife is supportive of doing this, but I don't push my luck by coming home and throwing on a skirt if the mood is right.
Honestly there are some days, if work was rough or just the end of a bad week, I just want to come home and get dressed, all nice and pretty with lipgloss. I'm slowly learning how to apply makeup myself without having to turn to my wife every two seconds and say "now what" (plus I always ask which make-up I can use since I have no idea what I am doing) Anyhow last weekend I really just wanted to dress on Saturday night so I did while my wife went out with a friend, so it was so alone "Alexxis" time, which was nice.
But yeah, I'm never truely free to dress, if I am expect to meetup with someone for one reason or another or if I need to run so errands, dressing would be my first thing I do after I am assured I won't be seeing another person that night, except for my wife or if we invited someone to chill with me being dressed.
Always with love... from Sexy Lexxi!
I live alone, in a house that I own, and am probably about as free as anyone could be to dress when I wish. (I do have a dog, but he's very accepting.) I live fairly quietly and unexpected visitors are extremely rare. The funny thing is that as I've gotten more and more into being out and about as Diane, my motivation to dress up fully at home has waned quite a bit. If I am going to go to the trouble to "go all the way," I want there to be some opportunity to show it off to the wider world. I usually have a few chances every week to do this, but when I'm at home, I don't much care what I have on. And it doesn't help that I usually come home pretty tired from work and often use my house as little more than a place to hang my clothes and rest my body at night.
I do wear heels 90% of the time and have long nails, earrings, permanent makeup and a few other things on all the time ... so the finishing touches are just that, the last details I put on before I go out. In the house, I'm usually in whatever drab clothes I wore to work that day, or something like a nightgown or bathrobe.
- Diane
I am in the position where I have my own private accomodation and there is only myself here, however, my ex partner and my children live within 200 yards of me and both my sisters are not above 1.5 miles away. As I have a slight mobility problem, both my sistres and my son have keys to my front door to gain access should I have problems (prone to falls and fractures etc.) One of my sisters calls weekly to help with housework and one calls to help with shopping etc, these calls can be entirely at random. Whilst none of these guys would even dream of looking in my private areas such as wardrobes or drawers it does mean that I cannot dress at will. Even at this hour of the morning (06:10 am UK time) it is not advisable as my son may be passing on his way home from night duty, see the light on and call in for a cuppa (he is a Police Constable BTW)
So on the face of it, it seems some of us have total freedom but in fact we do not. I agree with Lucy, family and friends first, my own needs second (I believe that is a femmine trait in it's own right anyway).
Did any of that make sense?
I do, I do! I can, I can!!
Ok, first of all, let’s clean up that misconception about your daughter. My daughter lived with me every Fri-Mon, most holidays and additional time from age 2 through 16. You will soon discover as I recently did, that when you buy her a new car at 16, you will be lucky to see her one day a month,. (picking up allowance). So enjoy the time you have with her now, lol. There, now for the rest of the program…
I do live in a house and I live alone. I am also self employed. That resolves many obstacles. But I still have unexpected guests pop by, and plenty of annoying peddlers sticking tape and flyers to my front door glass. Solution: I park in my garage. I covered the garage windows with cloth from the inside so nobody can tell if my car is here or not. I keep the louvers closed on all of the front windows. I disconnected my doorbell and I never answer the door. I have a motion sensor mounted over the front door that sets off a chime in my office when somebody is on the porch. I have 3 surveillance cams mounted on the front of the house and a multiplex receiver that allows me to see (and hear) all three cams simultaneously on one monitor screen in my office. (remote control pan/tilt too). So I know when somebody is out front, and can observe the activity. I have locks on my gate access to the back yard. I just allow my dog to bark when somebody is outside. My office is on the backside of the house so nobody can tell if I am home at anytime. I only use a cell phone set to vibrate, and got rid of both landlines so nothing “rings”.
Nobody but me has keys to outside doors. My daughter knows to call me when she is coming over. The people who do have keys to the house, actually have keys that do not fit the doors here. They just do not know it. My 2nd story sundeck is surrounded with sailcloth and all windows are tinted making it impossible to view inside, but I can see out from the inside. So my next door neighbors cannot even tell if I am home.
I have more cams/sensors/lighting/deterrents in the back. All windows have sensor alarms. I am friends with my neighbors, but not enough for them to consider coming over here without an invitation. They are afraid of setting off one of the alarms or activating some security equipment.
My stereo/tv/etc can be on without it being heard outside. Even the noise of shooting my pellet rifle/gun inside is not detectable. At night, all cams have IR and sound, and there are flood lights activated by motion/heat, or my handy remote, as well as other surprises.
If anybody (or animal) sets off my front door alarm, I simply walk into my office (carefully so I do not trip in my 5” pumps, lol) and watch the show on my monitor. It’s pretty cool knowing how close they are, but how far they are from discovering me. Even if the police tried to raid my house, I would know in advance and have a minimum of 15 seconds to “disappear” first, with every trace of CD activity locked securely away.
I know, it sounds like overkill, but I do this stuff for a living. Plus after the initial set up I can totally relapse, er, uh…I mean relax…without any concerns about privacy.
But if I ever suffer a stroke or heart attack…I’m screwed…lol
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
I live alone, so I'm fairly free to dress when I want. BUT I currently have a GGfriend who doesn't know about my dressing. So I need to dress around her schedule of visiting me. Thankfully she's not the type to just "pop in" and she always calls before coming over. Other than that, I can dress when I want pretty much.
WOW Diane, you and I are quite a bit alike! I could have written that.Originally Posted by Diane Smith
Last edited by Nigella; 11-05-2010 at 02:46 PM. Reason: Merged consecutive posts
I wondered about that! If u start out as a private, closet dresser, but were free to dress whenever u liked, would u eventually begin to go out dressed? Out of boredom, or simply "natural progression"?
On the other hand, I KNOW everyone lives their own way! So, I was SURE some would continue to dress privately! And, thot we mite hear some interesting stories! Like Eluuzion's!
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
I'm free to dress around my wife whenever the thought strikes me. Our kids don't know, and by mutual agreement aren't going to know at least until they're adults. So, in practice I don't have freedom to dress when I want, however I want.
I could get away with dressing more then I do, but!!! Its OK with my SO, but we live in an apartment comlpex, so during the daytime I really am not free to dress, as you never know who will drop by.
I now have my house that I own all to myself. After work and at weekends I’m free to dress whenever I like.
Due to this freedom I can go shopping when I like and get parcels delivered to my house which is nearly every day at the moment (dam pink fog! = my excuse for being a shopaholic).
When I get home from work, my male self is gone until morning. When I wake I’m thinking, right which panties and stockings I’ll wear to work today, then at work I’m thinking, what shall I wear tonight, what style of make-up, or should I really go late night shopping again!!!
Doc,
Great thread!
No I can no longer dress when and as I please, I have my daughter and her family living here now. I can dress in private anytime I please tho just to be clear. I will never place dressing over family or friends . But thats just me , I could be selfish and a hermit and run them all off but thats not me.
I do not!! Claim to be an expert on any topic, when I post a new thread or reply on any thread my imput is strickly that of a crossdresser. Not to offend Gay people , Transexuals or any other life style, I am only commenting on one of my own.
I am free to dress when ever I wont to around the house, as just me and my wonderful wife live here, however I am not free to do so when we have company as I am only out to my wife. so yes I am tottaly free to crossdress when I want to and then I am still in the closet with the rest of the world.
Currently dress whenever I'm home. I come home, the boy clothes come off, shower, live as a girl until I have to go out. I buy my Cosmo, Glamour, Seventeen, etc., once a month, and toss the old stuff out. I tend to read a lot of the beauty/fashion forums; it's quite interesting, to read a girl's point of view, I've learned a lot over the years.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
My wife has no problem with my dressing and I can do as much of it as I want to ... in the confines of our home or when in a motel.
Pretty much the same for me, although my subscriptions to Cosmo and Glamour keep me plenty busy reading about all things girly, and I'd be overwhelmed trying to add to the list...
I have the luxury of complete freedom to dress whenever I want within my residence, as my kids are grown and on their own. My GF knows I CD, and the enjoyment I derive from it, but prefers her boyfriend be her man... which I understand. I'm her BF when I'm with her.
Yet, I prefer being en femme alone, rather than submerging my desire to CD in order to cater to her preferences.
She'd love a marriage proposal, but unless she comes to terms with my needs, ain't gonna happen...
I'm another with an understanding wife, and no kids in the house, so I dress pretty much as I please, except when I need to go to town, and I don't answer the door if you didn't call and let me know you where coming, so no surprise visitors.
The fact that we're "closet" crossdressers kind of suggests by default that we are not at liberty to dress whenever we like. However, when there is any kind of prolonged "alone" time, out come the girly things!
Any money found in the laundry is MINE!
"This is no social crisis....this is me having fun!"
www.flickr.com/photos/tgmarla/
I am coflicted with this thread. I am seeing and reading too much hiding from family members, that in some cases are lucky to be able to live under your roof (daughters, sons). This is one of the main problems. Why are you hiding from something that should love you unconditionally.
Now the reason for the conflict. I hide my skirt, hose and heels wearing from my mother. But then again, if I wear a nice shirt just because I wanted I am asked 20 questions and viewed suspiciously. LOL. So in many respects I am no different than you all that hide.
I pray I find a female that loves me, and I love her, and she loves my little quirk.
Lived alone for the last 9 years and free to dress whenever I want as no one really ever comes over and my family always calls before stopping by, so I have time to put things away beforehand. Apart from at home I tend to dress fully male for school (not willing to risk anything in the department) and either underdress or wear panties, girl jeans, and tights most everywhere else. At least that's the way things have been lately. I still haven't made it out fully dressed, but it's on the short list of things to do in the future!
U OBVIOUSLY don't have children! There's NO WAY for me to list all the things that COULD happen should my kids discover my CDing!
But, I can assure u, 99% of them r NOT GOOD!
If u want: love, hate, ups and downs, anxious nites, extreme happiness, followed by hurt feelings and disappointments, have children!I am conflicted with this thread. I am seeing and reading too much hiding from family members, that in some cases are lucky to be able to live under your roof (daughters, sons). This is one of the main problems. Why are you hiding from something that should love you unconditionally.
If u want "unconditional love", watch Leave it to Beaver, or get a puppy!
Anyway, that's what I've found in MY many years on this planet!.gif "Big Roll Eyes")
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
LMAO! Well put doc! It is one thing to be a parent. It's an entirely different thing to be a responsible parent, lol.U OBVIOUSLY don't have children! There's NO WAY for me to list all the things that COULD happen should my kids discover my CDing!
But, I can assure u, 99% of them r NOT GOOD!
If u want: love, hate, ups and downs, anxious nites, extreme happiness, followed by hurt feelings and disappointments, have children!
If u want "unconditional love", watch Leave it to Beaver, or get a puppy!
Anyway, that's what I've found in MY many years on this planet!
Technology does help when you share custody...GPS vehicle trackers being my favorite, hehehe. (Particularly when the 3 days a week custody drafted when my daughter was 2 yrs old, has now gradually age appropriately self-modified itself into dinner once a week...if I am lucky.
Yo, Pythos, regarding that "hiding from those who should love you unconditionally thought"... That's a great point, in an ideal world...Unfortunately, that decision in my real world...has potential consequences such as providing fuel for a golddigging "ex" to blow the wheels off of many different carts in a shared custody arrangement.
My situation does not require any "sacrifices" specific to my relationship with "family" members. So there is nothing to be gained by disclosing my private interests. So I agree with doc's 99% negative outcomes of disclosure.
As a general rule, I do not try to fix things that are not broken...(computers being the exception, of course, lol).
Also wanted to add the point that my extensive "privacy" set-up at home would be the same with or without CD being part of my life. I just feel it is necessary to maintain privacy in these times. Also, I had 3 roommates my first year of college. I have never had a roommate since...just does not work for me...
Last edited by eluuzion; 11-08-2010 at 02:38 AM.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
I wear skirts and dresses in the house all the time as I live alone. If anyone is coming over they call. Outside I wear jeans and tops or shorts and tops depending on the season. My favorite indoor outfit is a chemise.
I am married to a very understanding woman who also is very supportive, She understands my desires to dress and never Say's anything negative when I do. Which for the last year or so has been every day. I do not have to hide any of my things from her, We share a huge walk in closet and its got more of my girlie things in it then hers. I can go out dressed anytime I want to, and with her blessing, she hates society's stigmas as much as I do, But I live in a very small redneck town and my business would suffer tremendously if I do go out on the town, So I chose to stay in the sanctuary of my own home.
Are daughter knows that I dress and is also accepting (she is out of the house now) but I try not to dress in her presence when I know that she is coming over. Its not because I am embarrassed to be dressed around her, but I do not want to make her feel uncomfortable around me (her dad). Most of the time she comes by is because she needs some fatherly advice and it is hard for me to mentally do when dressed.
Well, I guess that my closet has gotten a lot larger over the years! I dress every day while I am at home.
Jaen has known about me since before we were married.(which will be 20 years this December 22nd) The second person to ever know and see me dressed was her daughter.(She is mine also. I usually don't differentiate between step and not)
Since the years have gone by, I have told numerouse people. My mother, sisters, friends, a niece, ect.
I used to do the hallway dash while changing clothes on the way. Now, I just open the door.
Friends know that I will most likely be dressed as a female.
Looking back on things, I have not lost a single friend when they found out.
One friend was actually pissed at me because I didn't tell him a lot earlier.
It sounds like some of the problems that come up when an SO finds out and gets mad because of the deception.
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