Potentially Busted

[Rhonda Jean]

I've been looking for a house, and today met a real estate agent to look at one. I had come from work and was completely drab, hair in a ponytail, not even wearing earrings. We met at the house and went through the usual small talk and it happened that she used to live near where I did. She know exactly the house I used to live in, her kids knew my kids, we knew some of the same people, etc.. I also told her where I work. Typical. I wanted to see what else was in the area, so we went to a coffee shop to look at what was online.

I carry my laptop in a Coldwater Creek bag that looks for all the world like a purse. That's why I bought it. I carried it into the coffee shop and started to take my laptop out and she said, "OMG, that's the cutest laptop bag I've ever seen! I thought it was a purse. Where did you get that?" A minute later she says, "Now I know where I've seen you before. Do you get your nails done at Tanya's?" Busted. She said she knew I looked familiar, but couldn't place me until she saw me carrying that "purse".

I don't always get my nails done enfemme, but back when I was going there I always did. I've always been so careful to keep my male and female lives separate. This is the first time I can recall them being so thoroughly and undeniably crossed. She didn't ask me about it, or even comment on it, but now it's out there. I strongly considered asking her to keep it quiet, but decided to just let it go. Even if she broadcasts it, which I assume she will, I doubt that it'll ever get back to me. I hate being the subject of somone's juicy dinnertime gossip, but I guess I set myself up to be just that. I'm surprisingly unconcerned about it.

[Andrea's Lynne]

6 degress of Kevin Bacon here! Wow, what a small world, huh? My heart might have skipped a beat, but it sounds like you are right to be unconcerned.

[AKAMichelle]

at the end of the day it won't matter. You will be able to go on with your life.

[Karren H]

The customer is always right.... Sounds pretty much like a level of acceptance to me...

[GingerLeigh]

EEEEEEEK! I felt the same way when I noticed someone I knew looking at me at the thrift shop while I looked at dresses... This inevitably happens to all of us at some time. OMG is that..... oh crap. BUSTED.

I didn't think I knew anyone that shopped at the thrift shop. Stupid mistake on my part.

Ginger

[Sallee]

I'd say congratulations on a new friend who knows you for you and the shops and services that like your money. It just says one more time people don't much care. Even the gossip which will happen will only last for a few minutes, You won't even get your 15 min of fame.
No worries

[Kelly DeWinter]

...........I hate being the subject of somone's juicy dinnertime gossip,......................

Ok First off Girlfriend ! Where did you get your laptop bag ? I'm dying to find one like you described ? And who cares if it looks like a purse !

Secondly, I was a real estate agent for a few years and HATED going into the office, the gossip was unbearable ! They would talk about other agents and because I ignored them, lol I became the talk of the office, "Did you see his pink shirt today ? Why does he allways wear pastel ties ?" Then there was the office 'clique' just like being in high school again. On agent irritated me so much, with the chatty run at the mouth gossip, On my last day at that office, I brought in a batch of (ahem , cough, cough I'll say it's a lie if you repeat it) browines with a double dose of ex-lax mixed in. I typed a note to the agent " Thanks for showing me the houses last week " And left them in the conference room where the 'clique' allways had lunch. By 1:30 I had the whole office to myself and the reciptionist. Best damn day I ever had at that office !

You definatly will be gossiped about, and If it gets to be too much , remember the are other real estate offices
Kelly

P.S. Yes I knew it was wrong !

[Christina2008]

Busted for sure, congrats!

I can imagine her at home at dinner with her husband, telling him about you going and getting your nails done etc., all the while the husband is thinking “I wish I had the confidence to go out in public and get my nails done, lucky girl”

[Christina Horton]

That has not happene to me yet but then again I don't care if someone who's knows me in drab (outs) me. Cuz I'm out to the people that matter anyway. For me no biggie. In fact. Would love that chance to see what they thought. Did that think she was a man or no. Did she look nice or great. Or wow she's sexy. Lol. I think it would be fun. Then again I don't have a girlfriend/wife at the mo. Even if I did she would know right away so it would not be any prob either.

[kristinacd55]

Wow Rhonda. You just go with the flow sweetie. Let the tide just carry you........

[Debra Russell]

I had a picture of my self on the screen at at my business when a client came in I went to get coffee and saw her looking at it. When I got back she looked at me and back at the screen, then said," OMG can I ask is that you?" I said yes I had dressed up at Halloween and sent a Picture to to my sister to show her how much we looked alike--and I did. I ask her what she thought-"well your hands ar too big but other than that......" Well a few days later while shopping at Target and trying on ladies boots who should come around the isle but the same client -- I had one boot on and one boot off....she was on her phone but I am sure she saw me as I hurriedly hobbled around the end of the isle
I havent seen her since but I Know she will be in and ... Oh well

[Kathi Lake]

Yes, it is a gulp-inducing moment, where the boys want to crawl and hide, but you made it through with grace and aplomb! Like I told you earlier, you think that I am out? You, chickie, are just as out there. You know what? The world didn't end, did it? Yah. Didn't think so.



Kathi
(p.s. still lookin' for that Hannah Montana skirt - just to show you! )

[Rhonda Jean]

Here's the bag, Kelly. http://www.bonanza.com/booths/Garage...aptop_Case_NEW

And Kathi, I thought I was out of range. 30 miles from where I live now. Thing is, the nail salon is about 2 miles from this house. I at least TRY to keep these things compartmentalized!

I appreciate all your comments, girls. You do this stuff long enough you become fairly comfortable with the inevitability of something like this. I suspect the most common comment on this when it gets spread around will be something like "I'm not surprised." If I thought the news might make it to where I work I'd be worried. I don't see that happening. I don't have hardly any contact with the people she and I both know. I guess it could turn in to something, but I'm pretty much writing it off.

I'm actually interested in the house, and I'll be talking with her more. I bet it'll never come up.

[eluuzion]

One of the cardinal rules of maintaining two separate identities or assuming a "false" identity is to keep every detail separate. (Including places you frequent in one identity and the other).
Both "identities" must remain unique in every detail. It is not as easy as most people imagine it to be. In many areas, it requires purchasing two of everything, so nothing is "shared". It can be expensive for those with tight funds.

Most get tripped up in the same fashion as you did. The biggest challenge of course, is the vehicle. Few have the resources to have one for each identity. (or the insight to think strategically when driving and parking it).

Anyway, your goal is obviously not to become a spy...so this is just fun FYI stuff for the fun files...

[Jenny Gurl]

Maybe there was a reason your real estate agent knew where you got your nails done and was so accepting. Was this her? http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...ht=real+estate

[Freddy12]

The fact that you are not terribly concerned says that you are at a higher level of self-acceptance and more mature than you realized. That's wonderful. Many of us still care a great deal about what others think, and are overly concerned about pleasing others rather than just living our own lives. Way to go, girl!

[msniki48]

Jenny, Way too Cute! How did you find her?

[Jorja]

I realize that many are still in the closet and really nervous about being outed. Still, I say, if you are going to go out and about enfemme, get over it. The fact is at some point someone is going to recognize you. If you are not prepared to deal with it then you need to keep it private. As soon as you quit worrying about getting "busted" the more fun you will have and the more relaxed you will become.

[Jenny Doolittle]

Gotta agree with Jorja, although I know how opening a new door out to the public can be nerve racking.

Look at it as a step to fulfillment.

Congrats