The Continuing Saga of Jamie's Ballet Lessons

[JamieG]

[Note jump to the end of the thread for more recent reports]

Those of you who have been reading for a while probably remember that I started taking ballet classes last year. For those who are new or don't remember, these are classes held for adults (ages range from 18 to 60) and I take the classes in male mode (which means I still get to wear tights, they're just black and very thick, not pink).

After a near two month hiatus, I began my second year of ballet training last night. Once again, I am the only male-bodied person in the class, but nobody makes a big deal out of it. The class started off well; a number of times the teacher said "nice work" to me and one of the other students said, "You're doing a really good job. You've improved so much over when you first started."

At one point I was singled out to demonstrate a position. Unfortunately, it was because I was doing something wrong (for those with some ballet know-how, my retire had my raised foot resting flat against my other leg, instead of with the heel pointing out). Our teacher gave us a tip on how to correct it and asked me to try it that way. I did, and she remarked, "Beautiful." She also told the class that I have "pretty feet." I think I heard a few snickers then, but of course I secretly loved hearing that.

It definitely showed that I was out of practice. I had trouble doing some combinations that I had mastered last year. Also, after 80 minutes of stretching, jumping and dancing I found it hard to move. I'm still sore today! Despite all this, it was wonderful to be back at it. Ballet is a great way to get in touch with your feminine side, even if you are presenting as a male.

Is anyone else taking dance lessons right now? If so, how is it going?

[Avana]

Cool!

I'm beginning here in NYC at Ballet Academy East next week. I am really into the ballet (member of the nyc ballet) and it's something I've wanted to do since I was young. I'm really into dancing in general, but I've never had any formal training, just freestyle and various hippy spiritual dance rhythm type workshops, so I'm quite excited.

I was just about to sew the elastic on my shoes today!

Also I should say as a tip for all - male dance belts for ballet make great undergarments all the time. They are effectively panty gaffs with thong backs and really tuck it all away, especially if you get a size smaller than whats normal for you.

[JamieG]

Cool!

I'm beginning here in NYC at Ballet Academy East next week. I am really into the ballet (member of the nyc ballet) and it's something I've wanted to do since I was young. I'm really into dancing in general, but I've never had any formal training, just freestyle and various hippy spiritual dance rhythm type workshops, so I'm quite excited.

That's awesome, Alana! Ballet Academy East sounds like a good school. And I imagine in NYC there will be a few men in the class. Although, honestly, I like it when it's just me and the ladies. The few times other men have dropped by it only served to remind me that I was different from the majority of the class. I'd be interested in hearing about your experiences after your first class.

[Jennifer Marie P.]

Yes Im taking ballet lessons and love to wear the tutu with the pink stockings and also involved in yoga.

[pointeshoes30215]

Hello girls, I started ballet,tap and jazz in my early 20's and danced for 10 years till I got married. I loved ballet the best. When I turned 54 and my sons were grown I started again but just taking ballet. I take 3 classes a week for two hours each. I have always dressed in male dance clothes, but oh how I wish I could wear a black leotard, pink tights, and pink soft ballet slippers. Sometimes I have to make up classes in the girls beging pointe classes (adults and teens). My teacher has told me that if I was at proper weight and in better health she would let me do pointe work at the bar only. thank you, pointeshoes30215 Fred

[CamillaCD]

After the beginners course last winter I have continued with ballet dancing. The first school discontinued the beginners class for adults, but I found a new one in time for the autumn semester. This new school offers courses for many other types of dances.

This semester I am also taking a beginners course in jazz dance (e.g. the style used in shows and musicals). It hasn't got so many "rules" as in ballet. It is equally challenging though since I am not at all used to the moves.

[docrobbysherry]

I'm SO JEALOUS of all of u! Unfortunately, I can't pass the "under 60" barrier!

Here's a tip to all u prima ballerinas; DON'T go to see the Black Swan! Depressing ending! Plus, did she really learn to do all those moves herself? And, after being a pirate for so long?

[JamieG]

Hello girls, I started ballet,tap and jazz in my early 20's and danced for 10 years till I got married. I loved ballet the best. When I turned 54 and my sons were grown I started again but just taking ballet. I take 3 classes a week for two hours each. I have always dressed in male dance clothes, but oh how I wish I could wear a black leotard, pink tights, and pink soft ballet slippers. Sometimes I have to make up classes in the girls beging pointe classes (adults and teens). My teacher has told me that if I was at proper weight and in better health she would let me do pointe work at the bar only. thank you, pointeshoes30215 Fred

That's so cool. One of my regrets is that I didn't try ballet sooner, but if you were able to get back to it at the age of 54, that gives me faith that I've got many good years of dancing ahead of me.

After the beginners course last winter I have continued with ballet dancing. The first school discontinued the beginners class for adults, but I found a new one in time for the autumn semester. This new school offers courses for many other types of dances.

This semester I am also taking a beginners course in jazz dance (e.g. the style used in shows and musicals). It hasn't got so many "rules" as in ballet. It is equally challenging though since I am not at all used to the moves.

It's good to hear from you again Camilla. I'm glad that you're keeping up with the ballet and stretching out to jazz as well. Right now, I don't have time for more than one class a week, but I'd like to eventually take ballet three times a week and maybe try out a jazz class here and there.

Here's a tip to all u prima ballerinas; DON'T go to see the Black Swan! Depressing ending! Plus, did she really learn to do all those moves herself? And, after being a pirate for so long?

I liked the Black Swan. It was intense! However, it's not for the faint-hearted and do not see it if you're looking for a feel-good movie. I thought it did a good job of communicating the kind of pressure that professional dancers are under, and that a lot of hard work and anxiety is behind those pretty movements you see the ballerinas do on stage.

[marthaCD]

As you know Jamie I took lessons for a year en femme without the wig at a dance studio specializing in classical ballet. From day one i was in a leotard and tights underneath. The only issue is the tights over or under as men wear over. Nevertheless the owner never said a thing. Her only issue was if the tights covered the leg hair. In you pictures the scoop neck leotard with the cap sleeve is also sold as a mens by bal tog, mondor, millskin etc. Putting black tights over that would be acceptable mens ballet attire so I would not get hung up on wearing leotards in class. Rivers Edge, Action Dancewear, NYC dance all have MENS leotards on their site. Rivers Edge even has a mens long sleeve leotard. You might as well get some use out of it.

FYI Lady Ellen of LeFemme Finishing School of Piscataway, NJ, who was teaching me ballet en femme in Phoeonixville, PA is no longer out there. However she did a gurls class at a location in Bristol, PA about a month ago for 4 gurls.
I did not attend. Rates were very reasonable as I think it was $25. However if you google LeFemme Finishing School Meet Up she has 3 posted pictures of her CD ballet students from her classes. Contact her if you want to do a class.

[juno]

I just started Belly Dancing, as the only male in the class. I hope it will do good things for my waistline. The women are so accepting. Normally, when I try to get involved with the female activities, women look at me like I have ulterior motives. In dancing, I am accepted as a male dancer, like I've already passed the test for not being a primitive macho-man.

[JamieG]

Hi everyone! Just wanted to give you a little report on class. I've now had four ballet lessons this year. After a period of feeling like I had slid backward, I made some breakthroughs in the most recent class. For the most part things came naturally; I only made a few mistakes and got back on track quickly when I did make them. I'm really starting to hear the music and move in time with it, as opposed to focusing so much on what the next step is supposed to be and how to accomplish it. And as an extra confidence boost, the teacher said that this was the hardest beginning ballet class she's ever taught, and said I did well in it! Yay!

My biggest concern these last few weeks has been... costume malfunction!
No, not Janet Jackson-superbowl-level malfunction (thank god), but malfunctions nonetheless. I typically wear an underarmour-style tee and men's ballet tights. Well, last week I tucked the shirt into the tights to get it to stay in place. As a result, the tights didn't grip so well and started to sag. I was constantly trying to pull them up! If I didn't, it would look like my crotch was 6 inches above my knee! This week, clever me decided to put the tee over the tights. Tights didn't sag: win! But my tee kept crawling up around my chest: fail! Honestly, I don't know why male dancers don't just wear a leotard over their tights like the girls do. It would make things SOOO much simpler. Next week, I'm thinking about wearing a leotard under the tights, but I'm worried I'll still have the sagging problem. I think maybe I need to get a unitard, but we're on a spending freeze right now. I'll keep you posted.

Before I go, I wanted to respond to something that Juno said about her belly dancing class (which sounds really cool, by the way):

The women are so accepting. Normally, when I try to get involved with the female activities, women look at me like I have ulterior motives. In dancing, I am accepted as a male dancer, like I've already passed the test for not being a primitive macho-man.

I've noticed the same thing. It's possible they assume we're gay and not a threat, but I think it's more likely that they consider us more refined. I wear my wedding ring in class, and many of my classmates met my wife when she came to a few lessons with me. I think they realize I'm not gay . I think they respect us for being courageous enough to do things that would cause most "manly" men to melt in puddle of fear.

[katrinakat]

I luv the thread, I used to take ballet classes and it was sooo much fun!!!

When I was in college I would go to a weekly adult ballet class. I loved the femme, motions and the outfits (jealous). lol I would wear, black tights, a black leotard, black leg warmers. And over all that I had some cute oversized shirts and short grey shorts. Walking in to class was so much fun. I bought the cutest pair of pink satin ballet slippers. After class some of us would have a ciggarette and chit chat. They were so nice and encouraging!
They taught me proper femme dance positions and gave me directions to dance wear stores in the area. At times I felt like just another one of the girls. W


I think I might try and find a class. It's great exercise for your legs and buns.

[JamieG]

Just a quick update. For the first time, I wore a leotard to class and the world didn't end! Okay, sure it was underneath the tights (in traditional male style) and then further covered up by long sleeve tee, but at least I wore it. :-) It solved my problems of the last two classes: the tights didn't sag and there was no shirt crawling up my chest.

My biggest challenge this week was on Saturday I went out to a T-gathering and wore my really cute brown boots. However, standing around in those heels for hours killed my feet. They were sore for days afterwards. I was worried that it might affect my ballet, but fortunately my feet had almost returned to normal in time for class.

[Dawna Ellen Bays]

Do we get to see the boots? I LOVE boots!

[Empira]

I started ballet when I was 16. Loved it! Took it for a year stopped for a couple and resumed in college and then when I lived in L.A. I fell out of it in the past few years as I was in graduate school as well as working full time. Now, I am getting back in shape with returning to ballet as my goal. I built a barre in the basement and have been doing barre routines in the mornings which really makes me feel sharp all day. For my basement classes, I like to mix it up from wearing more male outfits one time and female the next.

Ballet is really the only way that I can get into shape.

When I was really into dancing, I took pas de deux classes and even took pointe classes! It felt soooooooo good to actually tie on pink satin shoes over my tights and be expected to do so! A thrill to the body and mind!

I wish that I could find a school where the men were allowed to come dressed en femme. That might be more than I can expect, but if I find one, I have the clothes ready and go.

Empira

[Randee]

I took jazz/ballet for two years and started out in my first class in black leotard and tights, all guy, no fake tits, no wigs, and no coverups. The ladies in my class must have liked it cause they fussed at me when I wasn't in leotards. My advice to Jamie and Empira is just go for it and don't worry about it. You won't be so nervous about it after you get through your first class. After that it's no big deal.

[Diane Smith]

My biggest challenge this week was on Saturday I went out to a T-gathering and wore my really cute brown boots. However, standing around in those heels for hours killed my feet. They were sore for days afterwards. I was worried that it might affect my ballet, but fortunately my feet had almost returned to normal in time for class.

Darn. All the while I've been reading your thread, I've been hoping that ballet exercise might actually make it easier to feel comfortable and walk in heels. Hearing that it actually works the other way (the heels make it more difficult to do the ballet) is kind of a big letdown.

- Diane

[JamieG]

This week in class, one of the ladies asked me why I decided to start taking ballet. I answered (honestly) that "It was something I'd been thinking about for some time, and finally decided to just try. I never would have had the courage to do it when I was younger." I conveniently left off the part about being a crossdresser and liking the fact that it made me feel feminine. She just nodded and said "I know what you mean. I didn't take ballet when I was younger, and even if I had, I wouldn't have tried as hard." I found her response interesting. I know that some women who might be interested avoid ballet perhaps because they don't feel graceful enough, but there's a whole other level for boys. I'm not sure if this didn't occur to her, if she was just trying to empathize, or if she was responding to me as she would to another woman. I didn't want to belittle her reasons for not doing ballet as a child, so I just nodded sympathetically and we talked about something else.

I do want to reply to something Diane said:

Darn. All the while I've been reading your thread, I've been hoping that ballet exercise might actually make it easier to feel comfortable and walk in heels. Hearing that it actually works the other way (the heels make it more difficult to do the ballet) is kind of a big letdown.

It is true that ballet will make you move in a more graceful and feminine manner. I have definitely noticed this, although I worry that it might be bleeding over into my drab mode. However, standing on demi-pointe in ballet slippers is very different from walking in high heels. I believe most professional ballerinas try to minimize their time in high heels in order to protect their most valuable asset: their feet. That said, if you do not spend 24 hours a day in heels nor aspire to be a professional dance, I don't think there's any harm in alternating ballet and heel-wearing. Just try to stick to your more comfortable heels, especially before you have ballet class!

[Randee]

Jamie,
Nice that that lady in your class asked. You missed your chance to add something like, "I was fascinated at the gracefulness of the girls dancing in their leotards and tights, but was just unsure of myself to try it as a boy." You never know when you might get a direct invite to get into some leotards and tights and join them. I got nothing but encouragement.You would like being able to dress for class like that even if you could not do it enfemme wouldn't you. You will have your answer ready for next time you get the chance I am sure.

[JamieG]

You haven't heard from me lately. We had a week off from class, and then I missed a week due to a minor family crisis. This week, I finally returned to class. One thing I've learned is that it's harder to get back into the dancing groove when you've had some time off. Although I did okay for most of the barre exercises, I really struggled when we moved to the floor. There was one dance that they had covered while I was out, and I was completely lost. I felt like such a klutz and that I was just in everyone's way. It made me kind of depressed. We're starting up a new session in two weeks. Since we always start slow for the newbies, I am hoping that the next class back will help me build up some confidence.

[Persephone]

Have been following your story with great interest and a sense of longing as I never had the chance to take ballet and am far too old now. I admire you. Sorry to hear that you had to miss a couple of weeks, Jamie. The new session will make a difference.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[JamieG]

Have been following your story with great interest and a sense of longing as I never had the chance to take ballet and am far too old now. I admire you. Sorry to hear that you had to miss a couple of weeks, Jamie. The new session will make a difference.

Hugs,
Persephone.

Thanks for your kind words, Persephone. It's funny that you talk about a sense of longing for a missed opportunity; I find myself wishing I had started when I was far younger. Although its true that both of us are too old to dance professionally, there is no maximum age for learning to dance. I'm in an adult beginner class, and the age ranges quite a bit. The class is mostly middle-aged, and there are as many senior citizens as there are people in their 20s. Based on your posts, I get the feeling that you are quite active, so you should have no problem with the level of physical activity. Maybe you won't have ideal "turnout" or be super-flexible, but you do what you can and don't sweat the rest. If you really want to try it, I say go for it. Why live a life of regret?

[Pinky188]

My S.O. and I are going to take some swing lessons. She has years on me in the art, but I want to learn!

[JamieG]

So our new session started up three weeks ago. I made it to the first class and the most recent one, but missed the second. Almost everyone is from the previous session, and everyone treats me like I belong. Many of the ladies are even quite friendly. One nice thing is this seems to be the smallest class yet; the other night we just had 14 of us. I really prefer the smaller classes. There's plenty of room to move and you get more individual attention. Our teacher also seems to think that our group is more advanced than in previous sessions, so she's excited about pushing us harder and further. I think there may also be a little bit of sadist in her ;-).

The teacher does have a tendency to tease me a little bit because, in her own words, "as a male I have so many natural advantages." However, nothing is mean-spirited, so I just play along. She does seem to spend a lot of time correcting me, but I've heard that ballet teachers do that for students that they think are working hard and have potential. She also gave me a lot of compliments when I hit such-and-such position well. To make up for the class I missed, she encouraged me to take the Jazz class she offers right after ballet, but I declined, since I had a family to get home to.

[JamieG]

It's been a month since I reported, mostly because I haven't danced much since then. After missing a week due to bronchitis (I'm much better now, thank you) and two weeks due to a scheduled break, I was back in class this week. As I said in my last post here, the teacher feels our class is one her most capable in recent years, and is giving us more difficult work to challenge us. The combinations involve many steps and are hard to remember. When she described the first one, I was completely lost. Fortunately, we repeated it many times, and I was starting to get it by the end. There was another that she did where I was like "There's no way I'm going to get this." But, I surprised myself and actually did okay. I at least got the major components down, although I know I messed up many of the finer details.