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Thread: Fetlife

  1. #1
    One Perky Goth Gurl Pythos's Avatar
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    Fetlife

    What is this?

    I have been referred to it a couple of times but the name puts me off. I have heard it could be a good meeting place for women that like CDers, but that name implies fetish, which to a big extent I am leery of.

    Anyone here part of this group?
    "I am not altogether on anyone's side as no one is all together on my side"
    Tree beard. Lord of the Rings, The Two Towers.

  2. #2
    Silver Member Barbara Dugan's Avatar
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    Its a good place to explore and if you are into certain fetishes ...yes I believe you will find much more open minded ladies there

  3. #3
    Aspiring Member
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    Well it looks cool so im going to see whats up. ill post back any info.

    -Donni-

  4. #4
    The avvy pic isn't me
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    It is Fetlife, you misspelled it, and i still pop on occasionally. You say the "name implies fetish", uhhh yeah it IS a place for fetishists of all varieties. And it is a huge huge place that has a group for every fetish imaginable and some you wouldn't even begin to fathom. One can find people to chat with and get to know and the CD/TG groups found there do have some GGs that participate.
    But given the way you worded your OP i would think you would be highly disappointed. In fact i think it is no better than any other social group for meeting potential romantic partners. The vast majority of members are there to meet people interested in fetish activities.
    Having said all that Pythos, and i hope you don't mind me bringing this up, but you have spoken of your GG girlfriend and that she seems interested in some fetish type roleplay in a "somewhat" D/s or fetish way, for that purpose it might be a place the two of you could check out together. Think of it as a way to learn somethings and see if that is something you are interested in.
    Be very aware though, it is a very "in your face" atmosphere, peoples avatars are commonly very kinky and there is no such thing as clothing rules/policies.

    Cassie

  5. #5
    Silver Member BRANDYJ's Avatar
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    I've been a member of fetlife since it's early days. It is for anyone into any type of what we call kink. Mainly for those that are into any number of things that fall under the way to broad umbrella of BDSM. I hate that what I'm into is under that umbrella. (Dominant/submissive) D/s It includes things like bondage, spankings and of course women that are, or like to be the Dominant one over men. This of course includes women that like crossdressers since many, if not most are very accepting of other alternate lifestyles.
    Yes, it can be a place to meet whatever you are into. fill out a profile, state what you are looking for and just maybe a match will come your way. Same can be said for bondage.com I met the love of my life there over 4 years ago.

  6. #6
    Member JamieTG's Avatar
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    I have met women who have fetishes or are into BDSM and they are definitely more open minded. Especially the BDSM crowd. A lot of dominant women like Xdressers. I'm not sure why you are leery of people with fetishes but it if the fetish lifestyle is not for you then I wouldn't bother with the site.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  7. #7
    One Perky Goth Gurl Pythos's Avatar
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    I guess I am leery of the idea of fetish. It seems in our culture only men are labled fetishists, and it is almost always in a negative connotation. I have been accused of having a fetish because I prefer leggings to jeans. It is not done in flattering manner.

    I most likely will check this place out though.
    "I am not altogether on anyone's side as no one is all together on my side"
    Tree beard. Lord of the Rings, The Two Towers.

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member
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    It seems in our culture only men are labled fetishists
    LOL

    My Favs:

    Mistress Dragonlilly
    Bobbi Star
    Isis Love
    Lorelei Lee

    All Top fetish Women, Before and after thier scenes on thier website, they are interviewed about who they are and who thye are doing the scenes with. All very healthy minded and kinky as they come.
    Oh and they really like crossdressers too!

    Perception and Perspective my dear friend....

    You friendly neighborhood Kink,
    -Donni-

  9. #9
    Silver Member Rogina B's Avatar
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    Fetlife...and it is a great active community that encompasses lots of things,not just the fetishes you may know.I have suggested it to some people on here as another avenue to meet people close by them,and they have had success.There is a place in this world for both this site as well as that.After all,if you scroll down this page you can click on a whole lot of things that are less vanilla than this forum.

  10. #10
    Silver Haired Member Phyliss's Avatar
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    Kinda wander through there occasionally, look for Phylisswilling
    Lead me NOT into temptation
    (I can find my own way)
    I HAVE WALKED THAT MILE IN HER HEELS
    CURTSY to all BOW to [SIZE="3"]NONE[/SIZE]


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  11. #11
    Junior Member and GG cordgrass's Avatar
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    I joined there with Rogina's encouragement, and also the encouragement of another woman I met in an unrelated forum. It was very offputting at first--so much latex and bruising! But, on the other hand, most women would consider crossdressing a fetish and I would think most women like me who definitely prefer crossdressers over drab men are fetishists. And I've tried to be openminded and discovered there are some aspects of BDSM that appeal to me; I have found my inner domme. Domming isn't necessarily about pain or humiliation.

    On the other hand, FetLife is definitely not a dating site. It's more like Facebook. It's a way to make friends and join the local scene, so you can go out and meet people and then date if you find someone who clicks with you. The good thing is most FetLife get-togethers wouldn't be a problem at all for crossdressers to go if dressed, particularly if they are dressed in something edgy and sexual.

    The other issue is that the ratio of men to women there is very favorable towards the women, and most of the women there are already in long-term relationships. For example I generally get one or two PM's a day from men wanting to meet me and so forth. So I think a regular dating site and revealing in the first several months would probably be better for finding a compatible woman, particularly if you are vanilla besides crossdressing.

  12. #12
    the happy camper
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    I was pointed to FL over a year ago. It was the first forum I found where I could discuss CDing, and I still visit to talk to friends and check out their latest pics. It's not a dating site, but it is a place where you can meet people. As someone who likes goth fashions, you could find people with a similar interest and check out their photos. If BDSM stuff squicks you out, though, don't go there. Not everyone posts those types of photos, but you will definitely run across them.

  13. #13
    Senior Member Sherry-Stephanie's Avatar
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    Just another place to hang out at...afterall we aren't your everyday normal gal right???? But then again, dressing is what I would think most would consider "normal" plus "variety" after all, is the "spice of life"....

    Also another place is "tagged.com"....

    Iuse to be there awhile back but left...might go back and the wife's on there as well...."ecleptic" group of people to say the least....
    Last edited by Sherry-Stephanie; 02-20-2011 at 02:07 PM.
    Discovering the female self aka "Bitch with an Attitude"

  14. #14
    Member ChristiesGurl's Avatar
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    I'm not into BDSM... oddly enough I would accept someone who want to play at it, as long as I was the one in control, even it I was the "sub"... makes no sense, I know. I may try fetlife, and be very specific about what I'm looking for. I have looked at and joined dateacrossdresser.com, but to read messages you have to be a paying member....and there seems to be a very few that I'm attracted to on there.
    "I know the difference between myself and my reflection. I just can't help but to wonder, which of us do you love?" ~Evanescence~

  15. #15
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I checked it out. Seems to be a lot of SM involved with their BD! NOT to my taste. However, they have many local get togethers where u can meet other locals. May be to gage things u have in common and compatibility? I haven't attended any.

    It's definitely NOT a lot of CDs hanging out together!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  16. #16
    Silver Member LilSissyStevie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pythos View Post
    I guess I am leery of the idea of fetish. It seems in our culture only men are labled fetishists, and it is almost always in a negative connotation. I have been accused of having a fetish because I prefer leggings to jeans. It is not done in flattering manner.

    I most likely will check this place out though.
    Just think of "fetishist" as being the N-word for people who deviate from the "norm" sexually. It wasn't too long ago that masturbation, homosexuality, bi-sexuality, oral, anal, and sexual activity using foreign objects were all considered fetishes, paraphillias and perversions. Now they are considered normal due to political pressure to drop them from the fetish list, not because of some scientific discovery that they are wholesome activities. There is no scientific basis for the idea of fetishes or paraphillias. It's all cultural bias. It's ridiculous that only coitus in the missionary position could be considered "normal" sex. I mean, who does that anymore?

    I don't know anything about fetlife. I'm well taken care of in that department.

  17. #17
    Member MonicaTC's Avatar
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    I came to this forum from Fetlife. I friend here was also on my Fetlife friends list (Thank you so much for suggesting this website Mary Ann). Fetlife is a good website for expressing the sexual side of things. This site is for the support I need to just be me, but I'm still living and do have desires. That's where Fetlife comes in lol. Fetlife is a site for being open with your desires with others who are nonjudgemental about such things. You don't have to like the various fetishes there. On the site everything is considered a fetish, even straight up vanilla sex lol. It's kinda laid out as a facebook for various "desires". It's not just about bdsm, it's about whatever that appeals to you in sexual side of life. It's not called bdsmlife, it's called Fetlife. Yes there are quite a few into bdsm, but that seems to be what goes for "out there" for most straight people (it's a generalization I know, please forgive me on that). Breaking the gender rule like we all do here on this forum is actually beyond bdsm in terms of normal according most. The site is worth checking out. If not for you, no biggy.
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  18. #18
    Junior Member ronniew's Avatar
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    i am also on fetlife and i love it. i am learning all sorts of new things and if you are looking for an understanding SO, this is the place. fetishes come in all shapes and sizes er i mean all kinds of things. some just have a fetish for feet, while others have a fetish for fisting.... all in all it is a place to hook up with people who are into what ever you are into with out feeling like a freak. everyone i have met so far have been extremely nice and encouraging. of course there are the few trolls and a**holes. but look past that and a have fun. there are all sorts of forums for just CD in traverse and northern mi and CD and the girls that love them... all sorts of stuff. i'm sure you would find something that interests you.
    Ah well, will have fun anyways.

    https://www.facebook.com/ronnie.wagner64 feel free to add me!

  19. #19
    Countess in Exile divamissz's Avatar
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    I'm a FetLife member, which if you know me is not that surprising. And if you can't guess my username there you are not trying...

    What is FetLife? It's a social media site for the BDSM/leather/fetish/kink/etc. communities. You'll find people who have interests that you might find fun, and others you'd never, ever go near. There's a number of transpeople there, who go from gender fetishists to post-op TS. I don't see it as a place for CD's to meet women-it's not really set up for that. But you will find people who share common interests, in your area. If you're not really into kink, you probably won't like it. If you have an interest, try it.
    Countess in exile
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  20. #20
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    Pythos,

    No need to be leery. It's just a word.

    Like it or not, and I know a lot of members here won't like it, crossdressing isn't exactly what you might call "vanilla." Some of the kinkier folks in the fetish community might think it's vanilla though... which is why it just may turn out that you meet some pretty cool people there.

    One thing about it -- people who are open about their sexuality like that, in a social setting, are guaranteed to make you more welcome than your local Baptist church!

    Give it a try. The very least it can do for you is accustom you to meeting new people and making friends -- and you might even find your Mistress Right.

  21. #21
    GG ReineD's Avatar
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    I am although I don't participate any more. I think very highly of the place. People are respectful of one another. There's a very wide spectrum for play, and no one puts anyone else down for their preferences ... or lack of certain preferences as was my case. lol
    Last edited by ReineD; 02-22-2011 at 01:07 AM.
    Reine

  22. #22
    Bad Little Girl Yolanda_Voils's Avatar
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    It has it's places of fetishes for sure, but only if you wish to go there.

    All in all it's sorta just another "portal" to enter areas of interest to you.

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