I am a knows but does not accept, will not talk about it but doesn't seem to want to stop me either, she found out we discussed it and then nothing more since, but she knows where all my things are kept and no naughtiness with any of them, no throwing them out or anything, just happy to ignore I think
Married 5 yrs; she fully accepts it... even encourages it...
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Love your woman within...
Know thy self -- Be your true self......
Well,, As I said earlier in this thread, when I met my Polar Bear, I was dresses as Sarah Palin for Holoween, and I gave full disclosure from the start.
But, what I wish to add at this point is, as I think about it, I think we have an obligation to tell right up front. As ohters posters have said, it saves a lot of stress and hassle down the road. I remeber with my first wife when she found my stash (and not matter how well it's hidden, she will eventualy find it) I was accused of having an affair. Needless to say, that was an ugly scene.
I really don't mean this to sound cold, but it's just a reality I must face, that I will likely find myslef single again, (PB has a bad heart) when I'm ready go looking again, I will be in a dress when I first meet my next SO.
I think she is currently at #1, but she still struggles with many issues.
Michelle
It almost seems like choices are missing. My wife would fall under 1. as knowing. She understands and is working with me on my cross dressing. Even after 9 years, I don't know fully where our relationship will go, shoot I've known her for almost 20 years now! But we are still trying and working on it.
I have to go with number 1 here. She actually started it with a dare so ... but I can't say I wasn't at least interested. We get along a lot better this way since I started dressing with her.
My love has, within the last couple of years become very supportive. It was not always that way though. She did not initially find out until after we were 7 years in to our 30+ year marriage. We struggled with what a lot of folks did (or will do). Because how she found out she thought I was cheating on her but after the disbelief of the explanation we went through many many years of the same questions laid out in previous responses. Was I gay and just using my wife to keep up a facade for my employer; was I going to just up and leave her; I stopped smoking cold turkey I should be able to just stop doing this if I loved her; etc. My wife’s anger is well founded. My greatest mistake, taking away her choice to decide if she was able to deal with this "prior" to the marriage and not after 7 years and 2 children. Sure she could have divorced me but she didn’t for a whole host of reasons but it has also taken us working with a therapist over the last few years to come to truly understand, accept, and help each other with what has become our common ground in this area. After 30+ years my wife has a clinical understanding of why I am the way I am, and the only area of tension we had between us 'is' fading away. Hugs, Di
1a knows and tolerates, but does not accept.
Discovered 5 years after marriage, but apparently sublimated this discovery.
Rediscovered 4 years ago after 29 years of marriage.
Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.
We have been married for 29 years. I started wearing her lingerie during sex. She really got into it. She would dress me in her clothes, do my make-up and hair. But as the kids got older, those times diminished. She has known our entire marriage, buys me stuff quite regularly, but has not seen Karyn in about 25 years. I really never thought to ask if she would like to see her now. Now that the kids are all grown and out of the house, she does see me walk around in panties and a full slip most days. So I guess you couls say she is supportive.
Definitely 2!
If she finds more items or catches me wearing items then I will probably be moving out and single again...
Has found some items, caught me in an OBG and stockings but porbably no idea of the extent or range of my lingerie/stockings collection...
So perhaps partly a 3
Last edited by chrissie; 03-21-2011 at 03:40 AM.
It's Don't Ask-Don't Tell at my house, too. I was married in 1967, and I didn't even understand my desire to dress. I thought being married would make my desire to dress go away. It didn't. She found out by accident a few years later. She made it clear she was not happy about it. We haven't discussed it since. I only dress when she's away or I'm away from home. I shave my body, wear girl's short shorts and sometimes girls underwear, but we never discuss it.
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