Not wanting to sound too pervy I hope, but is there anyone else out there who gets a right thrill out of seeing shop assistants reaction when choosing female clothes and paying for them at the counter. I just love to see a slight reaction from female shop assistants even though it may be hardly noticeable. Old ladies serving in charity shops are the best - LOL very loud!!!!
I don't know that I've noticed any reactions when buying articles of clothing ... I presume that my wedding band suggests the items are a present for my wife even if I'm buying panties or bras (or maybe the clerks assume I have a mistress ... LOL). But I have had actual comments from clerks - usually younger women - things like "Oh that shade will look good on you" or "That shade is SO you ... " when I buy lipsticks or nail polish. I just respond "Oh thank you ..." and leave the rest to their imaginations.
I had to think about that for a minute, but yeah I suppose I do get a bit of a thrill when I get a reaction. I must make it clear that I have never had a truly negative reaction either in guy or girl mode, but I can't imagine getting a thrill if I cause an SA visible distress.
I have found that generally the best, most positive reactions come from the younger gen. Some young ladies have just about fallen over each other rushing around finding different dresses and skirts for me to try on. They are usually chatty and helpful and have no reservations of giving an opinion on outfit choices. The neutral, or slightly "nose turned up" response usually come from the SA's about my own generation.
Tash
I'm not really interested in getting a reaction out of SAs, except perhaps a friendly smile. The first few times I bought undies or stockings I was so nervous that I hoped for no reaction at all. One SA in particular put me at ease. I'd purchased some E/F thigh highs (hanes btw) and she asked quite appropriately if I had the right size. I am sure I blushed about 3 shades of red, and said yes. At that point she realized they were for me, saidk, great", then asked if I'd wait a minute. She ducked back into the store room and came back with an opened package of garter stockings. She explained these couldn't be resold and offered them to me for free. I said something to the effect that I'd love them...maybe a bit too enthusiastically, and left feeling really good. From that time on she recognized me every time I entered the store and was always very friendly and helpful.
Now I really don't think about it. At the stores I frequent the long-time SAs recognize me by now and know I'm shopping for myself and its no big deal to them - money is money. And a few have become so familiar that we have a pleasant conversation whenever I'm in the store.
For some reason they all seem to just be interested in getting my money and moving on to the next person in line. Am I forgetting to pay attention again?
Sarah
Being transgender isn't a lifestyle choice. How you deal with it is.
At a thrift store I frequent regularly, I had an older woman, obviously a new employee, flat out tell me "you're in the wrong section, the men's section is over there". I was sooo taken aback that I couldn't reply. Whenever I see her there now, I can just sense her attitude of ignorance, and I don't even acknowledge she's there. I just do my own thing. The other ladies that work there I think suspect at least, but they've never been so nosy as to ask. Though they have complimented many of my fashion selections I just let them speculate on their own. Hugs,Tonya
"Be yourself, everyone else is already taken" = Oscar Wilde
I've had many great responses to picking out ladies clothes and at the check out! It just adds to the joy of shopping!
No, I don't get a thrill out of a SA or cashier's reaction if any. Especially if that reaction would be one of showing any signs of embarrassment or discomfort from them. I'm sure that's the major reason I do most of my shopping on-line. I'm not into public humiliation either while faced with it or my thinking it's behind my back when I leave the store. In some ways I envy those that don't care what others think or feel about us crossdressers. But it's not me to embarrass or be embarrassed.
With that said, on a few rare occasions where a cashier made a joking comment about how the bra panties or whatever will look on me, I smile and joke back, go along with it leaving her to decide if it was really for me or a special lady in my life.
Interacting with people is the ladylike thing to do. I always want to go back to the places where the SAs are friendly and helpful. Shopping and trying on clothes is a lot less fun if no one notices that I'm there. There is some scared/thrilled/relieved element that I am getting away with violating a taboo. But I also just enjoy being a girl, and doing what girls do--shopping & chatting!
Lainie
You're only young once, but you can be immature forever!
Yes, I do. Like everyone here when I first started loooking at fem clothing, picking up lingerie and feeling it, nervous that a SA would be watching and thinking you were a pervert and the nervousness of going to the checkout and saying its a present or for your wife. After years of buying, getting older and having more self esteem and self confidence I too like the challenge of how it will go, and I'm ready for them. Recently I went in a department store, picked out 2 bras and 2 lacy silky bikini panties and when I got to the checkout the 17 year old SO gave me a stare like "are you buying these for your self" and I think the little smile was suppose to make me squirm and turn red. I simply locked eyes with her, she blinked and bagged the lingerie and I left feeling I showed her her little prank didn't work and hopefully she won't try it on someone else. Another time in J.C.Penneys I deliberately asked the SA a ? about womens jeans knowing she would know they were for me. After trying them on I paid for them at her register and as I was leaving she said with a smile, enjoy wearing your girl jeans. Another time the SA figured out I was leaving the womens section with fem clothing, taking it to the mens fitting room, but was very nice and handled it. In my mind all of this is training women SA that men have a right to buy, dress and wear fem clothes just like every one accepts women wearing mens clothes, so there, enough said , time to close.
I've never really had a negative reaction either when shopping. Most clerks seem pretty indifferent unless I specifically ask questions, and then they are usually very helpful!
The only thing I am ever concerned with now is being seen by someone I know when out shopping, but I can probably handle that pretty well at this point also. Just say I am shopping for the wife!
I've never had a clerk do much more than take my money and wrap my purchases, always in a friendly manner. Oh, once one SA admired the Rosetti wallet I carry in my drab mode shoulder bag. That's about it.
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
I have several differnt reactions some good and some bad the good ones I go back and shop and write a letter thanking the company about how i like the service provied to me. me .THe bad ones I get one line an write a letter about how shittty i was treated adn dont go back
I had two sisters growing up and it was pretty normal to hike down a mile to the local dry goods store and get everything from smokes for my dad to tampons for my sisters. The old guys in the back eating slivers of cheese from the block of cheese kind of gave you the eye, but the owner didn't say boo. Later in life I find myself chuckling when I buy nail polish or a blouse or bra. The clerk is flustered while I stand there with a big smile. Doesn't faze me in the least. I was shopping local in our small town and the girl behind me grabbed my hands when I was swiping my debit card. She said," Do you have false nails on. You have fake nails on." I just smiled and told her that my real nails were broken beyond belief and these fake nails protected them. My wife got her nails proffessionally done last week and she asked the lady if men got their nails done. K. Pay attention everyone. Many men get acrylic nails done and it is no big deal. Especially if they work in construction, etc. She didn't ask about nail polish> heh heh.
I don't think I buy something looking for a response. I just try and act normal like no big deal. I don't think I've gottrn a negative response yet, I've bought dresses, skirts,blouses, panties, nightgowns,high heels, bra's, makeup, nail polish, perfume,earrings. Maybe they think it is for my wife since I wear my wedding ring.
I've only gone shopping three times yet, and every time, the clerk makes unusually long eye contact, and most smile
I don't go looking for a response, but I am ready for one. To be fair I don't get comments hardly at all, though. I think a lot of this is down to status and confidence: go to the checkout with your shoulders back and hold your head up, make firm (but not aggressive) eye contact and smile. Occasionally an SA might look down and get on with the transaction, but usually they will just carry on regardless. I might make some shatty small talk as they do their thing which can be nice
I like the interaction. It's nice when an SA will make a comment about your purchases. Recently at a Rue 21 the checkout girl asked if I had found everything OK. I said yes. She said "these are cute". (bought 2 tops - one a low cut, not very heavy long sleeve sweater). I said yes, I really like the sweater. She replied "I have one like it and it hangs just right, I really like it". I'm having difficulty but getting better at making conversation. Most SA's like the interaction as I'm sure it gives the job a little variety.
SheriM
In a very conservative area where I live I have never had a negative reaction. In fact have been helped many times although I'm not sure all of them knew I was buying the item for myself. One time a SA in Lane Bryant seemed to sense that I was buying for myself and commented "don't be nervous, it's a very nice blouse." Another time at another Lane Bryant I was purchasing a bra and the SA asked if I liked a balconette with padding of full coverage. She then showed me the difference so I'm pretty sure she knew it was for me.
Curious, a lot of jc penney stories here........I will admit it is a great store for misses dresses and pants.Last Memorials day the sa at jcp said to me
"your buring a dress on Memorials day"! Which I replied, "why not".....dana.
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