So, What is the deal anyway?

[Billie Jean]

I don't carry just the male chromosone I also have the female one and sometimes I like to express that side. Kinda like the old Mounds Almond joy commercial said, "Sometimes I feel like a nut, some times I don't." I can be just a fminine as I want and just as masculine as I want. Billie Jean

[melissacd]

For me, being dressed and socializing dressed en femme is the only time I feel at peace in my skin, I am never comfortable dressed en homme. It is not about being female because I have no idea how to be that. It is not about being male because quite frankly I am at a loss as how to be that either. It is about being me and that person just happens to feel most at home in a dress.

[Melinda G]

I think about it from time to time. I've been CDing since maybe 12 or 13 years old. I was married for 17 years, and I've had several long time relationships with women, and plenty of girlfriends in 30 years of single life. Yet I always come back to the CDing. The CDing fades away for a while during the excitement of a new relationship, but it always comes back. Yet I have no interest in men, even when dressed. I know I'm not gay.
For some of us, I think it is just an extension of our fascination with women, their clothes, shoes, underwear, and all things femme. It's also a kick to just become someone else for a while. To look in the mirror, and see a nice looking woman still takes my breath away. It's a visual thing for me. When I'm all dolled up in a short dress, nylons, ankle strap heels, wig and makup, perfume, etc, I often think to myself, "why don't women dress like this more often".

[nini]

I'm so glad to have stumbled upon this thread. Thank you all for being so open! I'm a loving (and accepting) SO of my CDing partner. The more I read, the more confused I get, lol. But with this thread I realize more and more that it is a personal thing and that every single person is exactly that: an individual. It is great to read so many of your stories and explainations. Still, there is one that is most important to me: my partners story. Reading this thread has made that clear for me. Because in the end, it is like some of you said: we all have our reasons and to us they're valid.
I wish it could all be more accepted in society as a whole. But change is coming. I really believe we go into a more loving and accepting era. Anyway, I'm glad I was able to read so many reasons why I hope and wish every single one of you can accept it and be loving towards yourselves, cause I really believe every person deserves to be happy.

[Kate Simmons]

I'm glad the thread help somewhat Nini. We change over time as well. Even since I started the thread, I've changed from a bit of a hard liner as Denise to a person with a softer outlook as Abigail.

[Yolanda_Voils]

When dressed "endrabbe", or male mode, I am soley attracted to women....

When dressed enfemme, I find myself attracted to other CD'ers and somewhat to very clean and neat men.

Upon thinking about being with a man, I think of them generaly as gross, sweaty, unclean and undesirable.

Go figure
As someone PM'd me lately, I sometimes say what many others think, yet more openly.

[Jocelyn Quivers]

I'm at the point in my life where I no longer dress up to feel like a women, or because I like the feel of clothing etc. Perhaps going through all the effort is how this side of me comes out and into being. Lot's of issues have been occuring in my male side's life. As a consequence there has been litterally no time for this side of me to come out. As a result I just feel as if something is missing and that a part of me is slowly being chocked out of existence. I again cannot say why I have to be completely 100% dressed up in order to feel complete. Maybe it's just that this side of me does not feel right sitting around in boxers, and a sweat shirt, or doing the partial or underdressing thing.

[Sophie86]

we may just as well be "guilty as charged" when some say that CDing is totally self centered.

Where else should I be centered if not on my self?

[lingerieLiz]

I think I’m imprinted that way. I don’t know why, but wearing women’s clothes seems so natural for me. Sexually I relate as a male towards females. On the other hand wearing men’s clothing has never felt normal or interesting. I did dress as a guy when working in the corporate world. When I was younger, primping and wearing sexy clothes was fun. As I have gotten older I still like really fine feminine clothes, but comfort has gained substance too. I don’t spend hours primping very often anymore. I tend to wear clothes similar to what my women friends and neighbors wear. If it is where I need to wear a dress, then I make the effort to look as feminine as any of the woman.

While I wear women’s clothes I don’t hide my sex, but I don’t broadcast that I’m a guy. It is hard to explain but I’m comfortable in a group of women wearing the same outfits. I love to shop with women, especially in groups where we compare our finds. Most of the time, I’m treated as one of the girls even when talking about lingerie. All my close friends are women. I love my wife and love being with her. I have never wanted to transition to womanhood.

[Fab Karen]

And there must be some kind of big payoff for a woman to go to all the trouble.